Friday, January 29, 2016

Sickened By Immodesty Among Christians

Paul Washer said in a sermon called The Basics of Biblical Courtship that what Christians wear to the beach today, just 60 years ago would have been jailed or fined by unbelievers since it was against the law. The women in the chat room were discussing the onslaught of immodesty our men see on the television screen, in the supermarket and everywhere. Even before a football game begins a woman who claims to be a Christian is singing and dancing provocatively on a stage in a dress up to her fanny. It actually looks like a top that is missing its pants. In church, women who lead the songs wear skin tight pants. The church doesn't even set and uphold standards of modesty that Paul says should take place in the Church. It's sickening how much Christians look like our culture instead of being beacons of light shining in a dark and decaying culture. Now, we shouldn't expect modesty from unbelievers but from those who claim to follow Christ, we should.

People will tell me that I am not to judge. Yes, we are to judge those within the church and we are certainly supposed to call any and all sin what it is, SIN. We shouldn't have to worry about going to church and seeing immodest women. This should be a safe place for Christians to worship the Lord and learn about Him. The Church and its leaders shouldn't be afraid of the women in the church but should set standards for modesty. When we visited Michael Pearl's church as a family, the women were all very modest and it was wonderful! It was a peaceful and secure feeling. All of God's ways are like this; peaceful and secure.

  A friend of mine said her father was a pastor and he had a very strict dress code for those who were going to be on stage. I asked her why pastors today don't seem to have those same standards and she said that they cater to the young. This is not how it should be. The young should be catering to the older since they are the ones with wisdom. Some churches have robes for their choir like David Jeremiah's church. This is a great idea!

If you are a woman of God who desires to please Him in all that you do, dress modestly. Don't spend a lot of money on your clothes since this is forbidden by the Lord. Wear clothes that are neat, tidy and even pretty but make sure they are modest. Ask your husband what is modest if you're not sure since he is a man and thinks like a man! Be a godly example of modesty to those around you.

In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array.
1 Timothy 2:9

***Please take five minutes to watch this clip by Dennis Prager about a man's sexual nature if you don't believe showing more flesh is difficult on a man and why you should dress modestly around every man, except for your husband's eyes only.

"Why are men so easily turned on sexually by a woman's legs, but not vice-versa? Why are female strip clubs so much more prevalent and popular than male strip clubs, but not vice-versa? Why is the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue a nationwide hit every year...among men? In five minutes, Dennis Prager explains why the answers to these questions reveal so much about male and female sexual nature, and how the visual impacts the two sexes in totally different ways."

Comments (47)

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This is an excellent and timely post! I lived in Australia for several years and served as a chorister in an Anglican church. We had robes and a special white overlay called a "surplice" that was worn over the top of the robe. Wanting to be good and ready on my first day there, I arrived early and put on all of the vestments. I was stopped by another choir member who kindly explained to me that we were to wait to put these items on until just before entering the sanctuary, that these items were meant to be set apart and special, worn only during our time of serving, and that we choristers would all put them on right before walking in. It was such a beautiful way to think of these simple garments. When I lead the singing at my church now, I have outfits that I have chosen to set aside for those mornings. (I wish we had robes, but we don't). I have taught my daughters to set aside outfits for church. Our clothes are simple, modest and inexpensive. The point is that we have decided in advance what is appropriate. We older ladies have to teach this; otherwise our lovely young women will go the way of the world. It isn't easy to swim against the current, but it can be done! We don't need a lot of clothes, as you pointed out in another post recently. Just a few simple, attractive and modest items will work, and it makes dressing for church so much easier.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
I agree with you 100%. When I went swimming for a long while I wore my one piece with my cover up which looks like a dress over it, the entire time I swam. Now I have a one piece with a skirt attached that goes down to my knees. I still wish I could find one that covers a bit more of the shoulder and not so low on the neck line. If we would start being an example more will follow. When there are only 2 girls wearing bikinis and everyone else is more covered they will notice they are not the norm for modesty. Of course I live in the midwest. If one was to try and set the example in California there would be a stark difference because so many there (not all) are about shallow looks and attention.
3 replies · active 478 weeks ago
You are right in what you say. I can explain some of it. I grew up United Methodist and never, not once, ever, was modesty mentioned. I didn't come to the real truth about salvation until my late 20's, and even then it took many years to even hear about modesty. Thanks to Beth Moore and Dannah Gresh, I learned about modesty standards, how and why it was important. Unless you are raised in a truly Bible believing home, you may not even know about it! I'm shocked though at church how many teens wear such short skirts, and I go to a Southern Baptist church! Some of the women wear very low cut tops too. Most kids go to public school, so there's that influence, but parents should put their foot down and women do need to set standards for girls. As for me, no bikinis allowed for my girls, their stomachs can't show when they raise their arms, etc . . But my point is, I just didn't know! So it's good you wrote this article, because we need more awareness.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
Oh, goodness - so true.

I think one of the main problems is simply that pastors (in all times) feel the pull to stay away from topics that will draw congregational anger. If they have divorcees, they don't talk about divorce. If they have working moms, they don't talk about women being at home. If they have women dressing immodestly, they don't talk about modesty (or they talk about it as a "heart attitude"). I think pastors of all ages are tempted to this sin (people-pleasing), but in an age like ours that is sliding fast, the temptation is all the more. We do need men of God who are willing to preach hard things to congregations that desperately need it.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
I am very blessed that my pastor sets standards for all who serve in the church. Ladies are to wear skirts to the knee or longer and modest tops. Men are to wear suits or nice dress shirts and slacks. I have a 16 year old son and he loves wearing his suit to church. He looks so handsome and grown up in his tie and suit. Makes my heart skip a beat to see how wonderful he looks. I also have a 13 year old daughter and she has made several comments about girls that go to her public school and how immodest they dress and how it makes her upset to see them with body parts hanging out for all the world to see. I am so very thankful that my children are Godly children and they adore the Lord as much as I do. Our preacher has no problem preaching from the Word of God. He will tell all the congregation that if they have a problem with what he is teaching and it's found in the Bible to take it up with God when they get to Heaven! That is awesome to me!!! You can tell when a pastor / preacher is a true God chosen man and is a true under shepherd. He has no problem telling it how it is when it comes to teaching on the Word of God. He doesn't do it with discord or any anger, it is done in love and with much concern for his "flock". That is the stripes of a true man of God.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
I like to call these kinds of churches "come as you are, leave as you were" churches. Yes, there will be immodest dressed women who are new Christians or who have never been taught-we should show grace to them, but the hope should be that through discipleship/mentoring etc, they will grow and come to have the desire to dress modestly.
2 replies · active 478 weeks ago
I think that those women that you see with tight pants and shorter skirts in church are modestly dressed in their opinion and probably in the opinion of their families. What a person thinks is modest varies widely by age and culture. For example I think that leggings as pants are inappropriate but most young people would disagree and leggings as pants are incredibly common. My jeans and tshirt wouldn't be considered immodest by most here, but there are countries where I could be arrested for this outfit. Modesty is relative.
8 replies · active 478 weeks ago
I couldn't agree more!!
Lady Virtue's avatar

Lady Virtue · 478 weeks ago

I'm curious as to whether any of the readers here have had opportunity to speak to a younger lady about being more modest in dress. I've read on various web sites similar to this one that the younger ladies are usually not receptive, even when the admonishment is delivered gently and lovingly. That is concerning.
7 replies · active 478 weeks ago
Bravo for this post, Lori.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
Hi Lady Virtue,
I am 29 and a wife and mother. I have been a Christian for 5 years. I did not have a change of heart about modesty until reading different Christian authors. No one at my church talked with me about modesty, not even when I wore a bikini to a church swim party! In fact, the pastor's wife was complaining that her husband would not allow her to wear a bikini. Although obedient, she was obviously angry about it.
There is a young high school girl in our church who leads worship about once every 6 weeks. After watching her lead worship dressing immodestly for the last 2 years, I finally got the nerve to say something. That morning she had worn a see through white dress that barely covered her rear end. When she dropped her sheet music she about flashed everyone trying to pick it up. I prayed for the Holy Spirit and graciously and lovingly talked to her about it. I emphasized that the way she is dressing is drawing attention away from the Lord Jesus and onto herself. She was not receptive, instead she took it as I was only talking about this one outift. The next Sunday she led worship again, this time in her regular skin tight jeans and tight fitting shirt. I am thankful my husband has finally decided to leave this church (for other reasons, one being that women are on the leadership board and the women are so rebellious and leading their homes that they are totally against even speaking about submission to husbands).
Thank you for your post, Lori.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
Lori, I've noticed a trend about myself while reading your blog. If my immediate reaction is to get defensive or angry, that's how I know you've touched on an issue I need to work on. I know for a fact some of my dresses are too short and I do the leggings as pants thing. As my mother would say, I wouldn't feel guilty if I knew I hadn't done anything wrong.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
Take it from me as a 45yr old man, it's extremely difficult to protect my eyes!! Temptation lurks everywhere!! Doesn't it?! As Lori pointed out and a lot of these great comments it's everywhere even in churches. I am at a point when I see some of the outfits in our church I am stunned some husbands would allow their wives to dress like that. We go to church to worship, fellowship and have our kids go to Sunday school. For some it's a fashion show. Which sickens me actually. There is a teenage girl around 18 who comes with her mom and she wears the shortest mini skirt and fish nets and the mother allows it. This mom comes from parents in our church. Even our pastors wife wears skirts well above the knee.

I am training my girls to look modest and I need to protect them from the eyes of others even though they are only 9 and 6. When we are getting ready for church I tell them quite often to change. So it's got to point where they say dad is this ok to wear?? It's so cute.

We live in a world where sex can sell almost anything. Half naked woman attempt to sell cars, cigarettes you name it and they advertise for a product. It's just sad.

I mean this with all do respect and love when you are leaving your house have a second look in the mirror and say to yourself hmm should I really be wearing this? Don't make yourself eye candy for men, just your husband. For me anyway I cannot speak for other men, but training my eyes and mind is a constant battle because of the temptation of visual sin, but I am at a point when I see someone dressed immodest or as I call it inappropriate I just feel sad for them!!!!

I'll give an example I have a new job in a whale house where it's 99% men, on Wednesday morning I was leaving work after working the night shift and one of the office staff walked by me as I was exiting the building and she had on a short short mini skirt nylons and those long boots. And heading in where she has to pass every guy in the warehouse to get to the office. Shameful!!!!!
3 replies · active 478 weeks ago
At a church we used to go to in my home state, the pastors daughter often led the singing. She was a married woman if I remember it rightly and after several Sunday's of seeing her up the front in revealing outfits my husband had enough and wrote an anonymous letter to the board of the church asking they deal with the issue and tell her to cover up. They responded by demanding he reveal who he was so they could deal with HIS problem. We left that church to move to my husbands home state. But we were disgusted by the churches response. Males do need to control their eyes, but that doesn't mean that females should make it harder on them to do so.
Another church we went to the pastors wife dressed almost like a prostitute. My husband confronted her about it and she said she wouldn't stop dressing that way as her husband loved it.
1 reply · active 478 weeks ago
Amen Amen Amen ! On Time the problem is we need pastors and not hirelings ! To be in God's will we can't please everyone
My grandma goes to church with extra silk scarves and gives them to the younger ladies who wear short dresses and skirts to cover their legs. Even though she asked the pastor's wife to say something, she refuses to do so because so because she is scared.

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