Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Love Never Fails


The following comments are taken from an article from the Huffington Post ~

These women are done. They say they aren't happy. They say they aren't in love with their husbands {or any other man -- they aren't having affairs}. They say they simply wish they were no longer married to him. They aren't fulfilled. They wonder if this is how they are doomed to live the rest of their lives {and God-willing, most of them have another 40+ years ahead of them}.

The common factor amongst all of these women is that they say that their husbands are really solid, good, nice men. They are not victims of physical or emotional abuse. They are not married to felons. They are not married to alcoholics or drug addicts. Their husbands are not having affairs. In fact, they tell me, there really isn't anything "wrong" with their husbands ... they just don't want to be married to them anymore because they have fallen out of love. It's actually a depressing conversation. When did we all become so unfulfilled with life?

It goes on to say that these women wish their husbands would have affairs so they could divorce them.  This behavior happening in the secular society is to be expected.  They aren't taught to love others and to keep their vows, but I am seeing it happening a lot among "Christians."

Many women are married to very good men, yet their supposed happiness is more important than obeying God.  The thing is they will never find true happiness apart from obeying God.  We are called to love, serve, and please our husbands.  The more a woman decides to live that way, the happier she becomes.

Too many women think that divorce is the answer.  They are fooling themselves along with the many secular women who feel this way.  They are trading one set of problems for another and usually, worse problems.  They will never have the joy of growing old together, shared experiences, and well-adjusted children.  They have allowed selfishness to run their lives instead of love.  Selfishness is from Satan and breeds unhappiness.  Love is from God and breeds happiness.

So if you are like one of the many women who are "unhappy" in your marriage, decide to be happy in your marriage.  The choice is in your head, not your circumstances.  Remember those very important vows you said to him on your wedding day.  Be a vow keeper.  There are many women out there that would love to have your husband.  Hold onto him tightly and never let him go.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
I Corinthians 13:4-8

Comments (32)

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What a timely post. My sister in law has just done this, she has a beautiful loving husband, but she decided that she is not happy or fulfilled for whatever reason and asked him to leave. I am not sure of particulars as she wont talk to us about it because she is not a christian, and she knows our view. I only wish she would read it (this post) and take it to heart.
Beautifully written. Our culture teaches us to be "never satisfied" and to always want something better. The grass is greener where you water it! So thankful that I have a happy marriage. :)
1 reply · active 679 weeks ago
Can't wait to share this one! :)
I read the original article and I feel like she left something out of the article. Toward the end she said, "One viewpoint is, "Suck it up, you made a vow, you made a commitment, stay married for the sake of the kids, doesn't 'until death do us part' count for anything?"
Another viewpoint is, "You only live once, people change, you shouldn't have to live unhappy and unfulfilled, the kids need to see what a happy, fulfilled marriage/partnership looks like."

But for me the huge problem with the entire story is that these women's fundamental unhappiness has nothing to do with thier husbands, but everything to do with themselves. They are unhappy on thier own and will remain that way divorced or married. Husbands aren't supposed to make their wife's personal happiness and joy that should come from God. I think for these women the problem really is the self. By the way I am unmarried so maybe I don't have the best perspective :)
Michelle
3 replies · active 679 weeks ago
"Love is Patient". I must remember this lately. My hubby has been working an odd shift and it's really messing with our family life. Nerves are rattled all around. I'm trying to be patient, but I'm afraid I haven't been very good about it. Maybe I need to move my Bible out of the bedroom so that I can keep up with my daily devotionals, because I'm gonna be losing it soon! As a human, it is so hard to not be selfish. I think it's an ongoing issue with most people. Stopping by from the hop. Have a wonderful Wednesday! If I'm not already a follower of yours, I'll be following on Linky Followers now.
People wouldn't believe me if I said I decided to fall in love with my husband. Society says you cant help who you fall in love with. I disagree. You may not be able to help who you are attracted to but you can most certainly choose who you love. It's one lesson I hope to pass on to my girls.
1 reply · active 679 weeks ago
I almost destroyed my marriage by convincing myself that I was meant to seek my own "happiness". Thankfully, God's power and will greatly overcame my own, and Josh & I remained together. Love wins!! :)
I went through something similar, feeling unhappy in a marriage to my husband who worked a lot and didn't have time or make time for his family. He wasn't a bad guy, just sucked in by our society's view of success. I made things much worse by focusing on the negative and day dreaming about "true love" and a different life as us women will sometimes do, we let our emotions get the best of us and cloud truth. I want to let any other woman out there who is going through something similar that things don't have to stay the way they are. After a few years (and a very patient husband) I was able to work through all of this by seeking what the Lord had for me in my life and in my marriage. I daily turned to Him to fill any void I felt was empty and to daily renew my committment to Him and to my husband. It wasn't easy, it was hard work. It was a difficult time in our marriage to say the least. But we were committed. Not committed to the same marriage we had but to a new and different thing we had never had, and to not getting a divorce. In time, my "feelings" changed. My love for my husband returned and was stronger than before. God can do anything with the pieces we give Him but we must completely surrender them to Him. And ladies, remember, our world would have us believe we are to "follow our hearts" but our hearts are deceitful (and only for pumping blood) and our "feelings" will lead us astray. Think with your brain, trained and focused on the Lord with scripture as your life's owner's manual.
1 reply · active 679 weeks ago
Stumbled onto your blog via the blog hop and just wanted to show you some blog luv! def enjoyed this post new follower! :)
http://infinitelifefitness.com http://mscomposure.blogspot.com
I noticed this happening even before I got married and actually discussed it with my (soon to be) hubby. We decided way back then that divorce was not even going to be an option. We meant it then and we stand by that commitment today. Marriage has not been easy. We have walked through some difficult places. Yet, with the Lord's help, we made it through. My marriage is strong today because when we were challenged, we stuck it out and fought together. We would have missed so many blessings had we been willing to give up so easily!!
Oh, this post is "spot on." My pastor likes to call the train of thought described in this articles as "stinkin' thinkin'." -- Seriously, it reminds me of the Israelites complaining about manna in the wilderness. Thanks for reminding me to cultivate thankfulness in my marriage -- to be a "vow keeper."
How sad! I think this just shows how powerful our minds are. Jesus tells to to put on love, to be content, to forgive . . . those are acts of the will that His Spirit does through us, not feelings that can be tossed on every new wave. Thanks for sharing this. May it open the eyes of many!
I have actually felt these feeling before. But I made a commitment and have a vow to honor. Besides, love is a active, ever-changing thing. You have to work on it all the time. I love the book "The Love Dare" because it really proves that you have to constantly be working on loving your spouse. This was a wonderful post.
Dropping by from Ann's . . . such a thought-provoking post. . . . as well as the comments. Thank you.
Our society has taught us that the main thing in life is our happiness. It's a very selfish mindset. Thank you for sharing this very timely post.
Blessings,
Charlotte
this is a good message not only for husbands and wives but I think business people too. To walk in love....looking for the good in other's interests...and think of their good and now only of ours.
Thank you for this! It's always good to get back to the basics "Love is patient. Love is Kind." I always ask myself, am I treating my husband like he deserves to be treated?
Wonderful post. My parents (not Christians at the time) said they too "fell out of love." It brought much discord into my life as a teenager. I love my step-parents, but wish that my parents would have made good on their promises to one another. I look forward to teaching my children someday about the covenant marriage commitment my husband and I have made to one anther.

Marriage is like any other relationship (although vastly more important)- there are going to be highs and lows- hence the vows "for better or worse" etc. etc. You must stick it out, pray, and be there for one another. I am so blessed to be a married woman and I cherish what God created!
I want to help these the devil would fool learn to love their mate. God's plan is best!
Amen, very well written..
Very true. Thanks for sharing your insight!
As my husband and I face the challenges that come with the first five years of marriage, new children, finances, figuring out our roles, sexuality, etc I know the main thing that keeps me firmly rooted is the fact that I am COMMITTED. The choice is mine to fine fulfillment in my the Lord first and then my marriage. I cannot give up. I will not give up.

Thanks for the wonderful post. My parents are divorced and I know the affect it has on kids. We can't let it be an option.

Blessings,
Monica www.myredandpurplelife.com
"There are many women out there that would love to have your husband." That'll hit you between the eyes. And I hope it does, so we all work a little harder.
Right on, we don't take our vows serious enough now a days. Make up your mind to be happy indeed!
I enjoyed your post! Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Lori.

Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis ღ

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