Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Are You A Mad Wife?


Ryan O'Neill had an affair while he was with Farrah Fawcett.   He was asked why he had an affair if he loved her so much.  He said that Farrah was always mad at him and he found someone that wasn't mad at him. Very sad...both the affair and that she was always mad at him.

So many wives are mad at their husbands.  I was mad at Ken for 23 years.  My mom was usually mad at my dad.  We just had dinner with a couple and she said for most of their 30 years of marriage, she was mad at her husband.

God doesn't want us to live lives mad at our husbands.  I sure wouldn't want some one mad at me all the time.  The commandments He gives to wives concerning their husbands are as follows ~

Love your husband.  {Ephesians 5:25}

Please your husband.  {I Corinthians 7:34}

Reverence your husband.  {Ephesians 5:33}

Serve your husband.  {Galatians 5:13}

Submit to your husband.  {Ephesians 5:22}

Obey your husband.  {Titus 2:5}

I don't see being mad, having disdain for, or trying to change him in those commands.  Those commands aren't given with a stipulation that he be a good husband.  Love him if he is a nice guy.  Reverence him if he is worthy of being reverenced.

No, there are no stipulations except one...because God commands you to do these things. He is a good God and His ways are always good.  Trust Him.  Forgive your husband and be mad at him no longer.  A woman who is mad at her husband cannot be joyful and God commands us to be joyful.  Life is a lot better when you are rejoicing.

For the anger of man does not
       produce the righteousness of God.        
James 1:20

Unveiled Wife

Comments (6)

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My mom stayed mad at my dad for 23 years and divorced him. He never knew what hit him because he just thought that's how she is. I so wished she would have stopped being mad at him but when I told her...she got mad at me! Oh well. I too was mad at my husband for 26 years and through reading your blog I realized that I was mad at him for the same reasons I fell in love with him. I also read the Pearl's book and it transformed my marriage and my life. Thanks again for your voice!
Great post.
Another Lori's avatar

Another Lori · 655 weeks ago

I learned this lesson the hard way but God healed and restored our marriage. He made it better than ever...and yet it is still easy to fall back into that nasty habit. Thankful for this reminder.
This kind of anger is deeply rooted in pride, isn't it? Your question is profound. Clearly no one would WANT to go through life in an unhappy, angry marriage, but I can see where it would easily become a habit without us realizing. The stressors of life somehow replace that initial loving relationship and resentment can take hold. Thank you for your succinct challenge. Blessings!
I love my husband...but feel he cheated me out of something. My husband knew he was the only one, I'd "saved" myself for him; due to his silence, while dating, I thought he'd done the same for me.
Later, not even six months into marriage and finding out that wasn't the case, I felt as though I'd been lied to, that I didn't get to be that "mystery revealed" for him that he was for me. Someone else had that privilege ...I never would; and, I feel like I should've had a choice -not just "BTW..."
First, I feel like I was cheated on.
Second, no matter how much I love him, the joy of our physical relationship disappeared.
I said "I do" & I have needs, as a woman, but have never learned to cherish our life in the bedroom.
I don't deny him attention; I've just never learned to trust him fully & still feel as though something is missing -after 24 years- like a precious bond was severed while still on our honeymoon.
I am a divorced mother of 3 girls, now remarried for 12 years and have 2 more girls with current husband. My first marriage was nothing but lies, anger, and abusive (mentally and physically). I left him because I couldn't be with someone I could no longer trust or respect. I tried with him for 6 1/2 years, but I didn't want my girls to think that this is what love was. When I remarried it was to a man that I adored and had been friends with since high school. He was so great to my girls and myself. He undoubtedly loved us. However, over the years we moved into a home that required a lot of remodeling that we had to do ourselves since we couldn't afford to hire help. I stay at home while he works, this is our agreement. I feel that I am the only one that wants a clean and nice looking home. He collects a lot of stuff and it gets scattered all around. His garage is such a mess that I don't like to enter it. Then he tells our kids that they have clean up their messes and that they have to take better care of their things. I feel a lot of anger towards his behavior. I don't feel that he respects all that I do around here. He shows this great deal of respect towards the women in his workplace, but I am known as the "Crazy" lady who is always yelling at people to help out more around the house. Have I lost it? I want to find peace in my life and get past these feelings but I don't know how. Please, any advice would be great.

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