Friday, November 7, 2014

Yikes! You Married a Man?

So you married a man? Do you love that man? God commands that you love him. It has nothing to do with your feelings or your expectations. If you do not love your husband, you are living in sin. Love is not a feeling. It is a choice. It was the choice you made on the day you said, "I do" and vowed to love him until "death do you part."

Strange how easy it seems to be for some women to expect their husbands to be women; to act like women, to do what is expected of women. Instead of that, they are men; they act like men, they do what is expected of men, and thus they do the unexpected. They surprise their wives by being men and some wives wake up to the awful truth that it is not, in fact, a man that they wanted after all. It was marriage, or some vague idea of marriage, which provided the fringe benefits they were looking for: a home, children, security, and social status. But somehow marriage has also insinuated into their cozy lives this unpredictable, unmanageable, unruly creature called a man. {Elizabeth Elliott}

 Yes, some of you will have tribulation in your marriage and are married to a very difficult man. Life down here is far from perfect. You are married to someone who is far from perfect. You are far from perfect but this is how God shows Himself to the world, through us and our imperfect marriages. We love because He first loved us; not because our spouses are worthy of loving but because He first loved us.

If God who is perfect can love us who are imperfect and God lives and works mightily within us, we can love our husbands. We CAN walk in obedience to Him and He commands that we love the man we chose to marry. Way too many women are not taking this command seriously. Actually, they probably don't even realize it is a command, but it is and we must obey it if we are to reap God's blessings in our lives.

You see, when we obey God's commands, we are spreading the Gospel, our first love. When we love someone for all of our days, the world takes notice. People even marvel at couples who have been married 20, 30, 40, or more years. "Wow! What has kept them together for so long? What is their secret?"

Here is the one word answer, "God." God is the secret. He commands we love our husbands, so we love them until death do us part, because He always knows best. This preaches the Gospel in a powerful way. Living out the Gospel should give us the power to do the impossible; stay married to one man all of our days. If your husband is unsaved, it may change him and bring him to repentance. God says you sanctify him as you live with him. 

This also asks another important question. If your husband married you, who is at times imperfect, unloving, unsubmissive and maybe even rebellious, would you expect him to be a man of his word and a man of God? Or instead should he throw you out of his life because you do not measure up to his expectations? Do you not desire the same thing you should be willing to give him; kindness, patience, love, understanding and most of all, commitment, if not for love's sake, for the sake of the Lordship of Christ? When the stronger believer is unwilling to do their part through the tough times of a marriage, it makes the Gospel look weak and powerless to change lives, beginning with their own life.

Therefore, wives, love that man you married. Yes, that one! If you find it impossible because of unfaithfulness or abuse, go seek godly counsel, but obey God. Preach the Gospel to a lost world by loving your husband. Please him, serve him, respect him, submit to him, and yes, even obey him. "Wow! She's doing the impossible!" Yes, but with God, ALL things are possible. And will our obedience return void without its proper rewards in this life and the next? NEVER, as God is no liar, but is always faithful to His Word and His children.

Older women...teach the young love their husbands.
Titus 2:3-5

***The picture is of my parents who have been married over 60 years. How did they do it? God. Now they have three children and ten grandchildren all walking in Truth. {And all of their children's spouses and grandchildren's spouses are walking in Truth.}

***If you are being physically abused or are in 
emotional turmoil because of your marriage, please read THIS.