This list was on Stumble Upon. I have no idea who wrote it. There was nothing to click on to find out. It was definitely written by a man, probably not married. I don't think he is a Christian so take that into account when reading. I did delete some of them that I thought were inappropriate. This list is VERY informative and telling how most men think. I think you will enjoy it. Your husband will REALLY enjoy it!
1. Sometimes we just don't want to talk. Don't take it personally.
2. We notice other women because we are men and we are alive.
This does not mean we're planning to dump you and jump them.
3. Our favorite T-shirts are not "disgraceful." They show our loyalty to
our college, our favorite sports team, our favorite beer,
our favorite vacation or number 23.
4. Helpless is not cute.
5. Get to the point.
6. Understand that men are single-minded and can only do one thing at a time. So don't talk to us while we're doing something. We will either ignore you, because we don't hear you "honestly", or we'll screw up what we're doing because you've distracted us.
Exception to Rule 6. Interrupt us if something is on fire, if someone needs immediate medical attention or if there is an emergency that needs a hero.
7. You can't complain that there are no good guys around while some of us are still single.
8. If you ask us, "Do you think she's prettier than me?" we just might say, "Yes."
Then what are you going to do?
9. Don't expect even a great relationship with us to solve all your problems. Just because we love you, doesn't mean your cellulite, your credit card debt or your bad mood will disappear.
10. We would not wear high heels to impress you.
11. Breathe occasionally so we can get a word in.
12. For us, driving is not just a means of going from point A to point B. It's an opportunity to control a couple of tons of steel. We drive, therefore, we are.
13. If you want us to notice something, help us out by saying something like,
"I went to the beauty shop today."
14. If you have to have a cat, at least don't call him "Mister" anything.
15. Hide the self-help books when we come over. They make us nervous.
16. We need to vegetate.
17. We don't go shopping. When we need something, we buy it.
18. We believe our bodily functions are perfectly normal and, at times,
19. We don't believe you when you say money isn't important to you.
20. It's not that we don't want to make you happy, it's just that sometimes,
we don't know how.
21. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
22. If it itches, it will be scratched.
23. If you ask a question you don't really want an answer to,
expect an answer you didn't want to hear.
24. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
25. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss topics such as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
26. Sundays equals sports. Period.
27. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
28. You have enough clothes.
29. You have too many shoes.
30. Crying is blackmail.
31. Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one: Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints don't work. Just say it!
32. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a
calendar you know we check.
33. We're not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
34. Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes you think we'd be any
good at choosing which pair - out of 30 - would look good with your dress?
35. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
36. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we
do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
37. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
38. Check your oil.
39. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take any quiz together.
40. It doesn't matter which quiz.
41. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
All comments become null and void after seven days.
42. If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
43. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
44. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
45. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
46. If you wear a Wonderbra and a low-cut blouse, you lose the right to
complain about having your boobs stared at.
47. Our relationship is never going to be like it was the first
two months we were going out.
48. Men see a limited number of colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach is a fruit, not a color.
49. Ditto melon.
50. If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing is wrong.
Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.