This was the question Steven and Cassi asked Ken recently. Steven had asked me earlier about the beginnings of our relationship. I told him we argued quite a bit after we got engaged and then a lot after we were married. They couldn't understand why we would get married if we argued all the time.
Good question. That is all I saw. I had never been taught that we shouldn't argue. I didn't know arguing and quarrelling was so condemned in the Bible. I wasn't taught to pursue peace with everyone, especially my husband.
My children don't argue. They have been taught differently. They have been taught to pursue peace with all men. They have figured out that there is nothing good that comes from arguing. Even arguing with your neighbors or relatives about politics shouldn't characterize your life.
So Ken told them he married me because he knew I would be a good mom and I had a heart for the Lord. Thankfully, he could see the good in me and stuck it out with me. Was he perfect? No. He had a lot of things to change about him also, but I have learned at my old age that God does a much better job at changing someone than we do. We can't change anybody, except our self.
When you don't have any good role models in your life and aren't taught what a good marriage looks like, it is difficult to have a good marriage. This is why the Bible commands the older women to train the younger women. They need help like I did.
The above picture was taken at Alyssa's wedding. Ken can honestly say that he is happy he married me now. I have become the wife that he has always wanted with the Lord's strength working inside of me to change me. I praise God for His amazing grace and ways. He is so good and worthy of all of our praise.
May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.