Sunday, June 24, 2012

Being Selfish And Manipulative


She is an old woman now who has raised a lot of children.  When being interviewed she was asked what is different about today's women compared to her generation of women.  She said, "Women today are selfish and manipulate their husbands."  That doesn't sound too complimentary.

Selfish and manipulative.  I think the reason we struggle with these two characteristics is because when we are growing up we are taught to pursue our dreams, be strong and independent, and don't depend upon a man.  These are completely opposite of what the Bible teaches.

Pursue our dreams.  The Bible teaches us to pursue God and then He will give us the desires of our heart.  It teaches us to become more and more like Him as we are transformed by the renewing of our minds.  It tells us to seek His will for our life, not our own.

Be strong and independent.  The joy of the Lord is our strength.  We are to lean on Him and Him alone.   We know in ourselves that we are weak and fragile.  We can do nothing apart from Him.  We are told that when we are weak, He is strong.  His strength is made perfect in weakness.  We are also called to deny ourselves and serve others.

Don't depend upon a man.  The Bible says that women are the weaker sex.  Accept that.  In Genesis, Eve was created because Adam was lonely and needed a suitable help meet so God created Eve.  Eve was created for Adam, not Adam for Eve.  Men are stronger and are called to be protectors and providers.  Women need protectors and providers.  Accept the wonderful differences between men and women.

Finally, a submissive wife is a strong woman.  It takes strength to not manipulate, control, be selfish and unkind, not fight back, yield your will to his, and serve your husband.  It is much easier to let your emotions dictate your actions and give into them than to keep them under control and do the right thing.  Biblical submission is a beautiful thing.  Being selfish and manipulative is ugly and destructive.

The path of God's blessing lay in following your husband's leadership under God.  I believe this to be true with my whole heart!  God's ways and His blessings are amazing.  They are completely opposite of the world's ways but look carefully at what direction the world is going.  Do you like what you see?

Choose you this day whom you will serve
but as for my and my house,
we will serve the Lord.

Comments (25)

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Thank you so much for sharing this. God knew I would read it! Bet you didn't know you wrote it just for little ol' me! I'm having such a hard time right now being respectful and submissive. It is very hard living with such a negative person. I'm praying for strength. Thanks again
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
Yes, it is hard living with a negative person but you just continue being optomistic and happy and you may just win him without a word! This is a wonderful promise from God.
Love this post! Right on point, as usual. :) Come on by, if you will, and link this up to my Marital Oneness Mondays link up. My post is now live and I'd love for you to share this there.
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
Thanks, Jolene. I will link it up.
Thanks for being bold & unafraid to say it! So much of the opposite oozes into my thinking and it takes real work to remember the truth. Reminds me of the verse, "There is a way that seems right to a man (woman), but in the end it leads to death." Prov 14:12. Not what I want!
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
This is why the Bible reminds us to encourage one another daily because God knows we forget so easily!
By teaching your daughter this, her marriage will start off on the right foot and be so much better.
Thanks, I plan on it, Lord willing!
I've never really thought about the strength it takes to be a submissive wife, but it's true! It's difficult to be loving and obedient, and I fail at it regularly! We often hear that submissive women are weak doormats, but truly, nothing could be further from the truth!
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us. We must never forget this! It is His power working mightily through us that we can walk in obedience to Him!
I love reading your posts. Like fresh water on a hot day! Said a prayer for you too. :)

Many Blessings,
April
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
Thank you so much for your prayers. I value them.
I love your posts....they are always inspirational, and come at just the right time. A woman does have to stay strong to be a submissive wife, and the last few days I keep having to remind myself of this! Thank you for always posting such encouraging words!
1 reply · active 665 weeks ago
Keep reminding yourself who lives inside of you!
You said "The Bible says that women are the weaker sex." -- but the Bible actually says that women are like/as (that would be a simile) the weaker vessel (a vessel being a clay or glass container, pitcher, jar or jug). That is more likely to mean that we are valuable and beautiful (like fine / weak china) rather than being coarse, thick or shoddily made. It's a beautiful metaphor, but it doesn't mean what you think it means.

You said "Eve was created because Adam was lonely and needed a suitable help meet so God created Eve." -- but none of that is in the Bible. It does not say Adam was lonely. It says that Adam was given a command that he couldn't fulfill without the critical and necessary help of a woman. He was only half a species. He needed to see that partnership with a woman was critical if he was going to be able to be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth or subdue it.

All people (both men and women) need a protector and provider -- that protector and provider is God.

All people express godliness when they behave as God would: sometimes by protecting and providing for others. This is admirable when men do it, but it is equally valuable when women do it.

Submission, servant-hood and the ability to yield self-will are likewise admirable virtues... in both men and women.

Submission, servant-hood and the ability to yield one's self will are required in all Christians, but most especially in those who are considered mature enough to be called someone's 'leader'. Self-submission does not mean that the other person is automatically the leader. In Christian relationships, both leaders and followers are self-submissive.

Wives who are submissive are free to follow their husband's leadership (if he offers it, and if they would like to receive it). There are also many other ways to live out life as self- submissive Christian woman. Leadership is not necessarily a part of every Christian marriage.
2 replies · active 475 weeks ago
Wecome back, PJB. I haven't heard from you in a long time!
I try not to be too consistantly annoying... I know blogs are very important to the people who write them, and very personal. I just like a good chat on these sorts ot things.
I love the way you brought out how much strength is needed in submission. That is so true.
I love how you compare what the world says to what the world says. Beautiful. :) Thanks for sharing! This will help me for sure. :) Blessings, Lauren , lholmes79.wordpress.com
Hello, I totally agree, I have lived a life whereby until I came back to God, I always did well at work , but underneath was not happy, could say emotionally unbalanced and unwell, I found it hard to be feminine, and was not too chuffed at the idea at the concept of ever getting married and being supportive of a husband.... Years later, I am back with God ( probably been around 1 1/2 to 2 years now) , I am learning slowly to depend and trust on Him, in short I am trying to accept both His Love and Authority and accept that I could discard the 'career' for the right Christian man and submit to both God and him via God... A bit of a turnaround but there is somethign in that feels much healthier and grounded to me!
Bless you for sharing.
Great post! It is so true that today's culture has messed us up! I love what you said: "It is much easier to let your emotions dictate your actions and give into them than to keep them under control and do the right thing." We've been taught to honor ourselves first, instead of control ourselves!
God knew I needed this! Thank you for posting so He could lead me here! Just what I needed to read.

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