Thursday, February 5, 2015

Why the 50 Shades of Grey Craze?


This generation seems lost. Their parents have forgotten the admonition in the Bible, "We will not hide them from their children, but we will tell to the generation to come the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, and His might, and the wonderful works that He has performed" {Psalm 78:4}. Since parents are not telling their children all the amazing things the Lord has done for us, including saving us from the wrath to come, the children are being taught by this fallen society.

This is why Fifty Shades of Grey is so popular. If we aren't the ones modeling to our children a Christ-centered marriage, if we aren't the ones teaching them the beauty of sex, and if we aren't the ones telling and showing them what true love is, then they will get an evil, distorted view of all of these things from society and walk on the broad path that leads to destruction. One woman commented on another blog that was discussing these things  these words ~

We all know that this movie is going to be one of the most money making movies of ALL time {until the next one comes out} and that no one, not even a little man and his blog can stop that. I don’t care if you are a feminist, a Christian, a non Christian, a porn hater, a porn lover, or whatever. No matter what we do, this is becoming the social norm. But why is that? Because love doesn’t matter anymore. My parents love each other, and have shown me that growing up. I know that love can’t be found in kinky sex play, or BDSM, or any sort of relationship like that. I know that this book isn’t REAL love. However, this book is defining what “love” is to the new generation. Why? Because the older generation has given up. 

You don’t see a whole lot of young folk at church anymore, or hanging out with older couples, learning from them. Why? Because we are “already gone” or something like that. What happened to mentorship from the church? Don’t go bashing people who get into this stuff. I mean, yeah. it's bad. You see me post anti-porn stuff all the time on here, but I am not bashing the user. They don’t know any better because it is becoming so normal. I mean, who cares anymore? Either you bash the people, or you don’t say ANYTHING about it. 

I bet if we actually talked about WHY it was wrong, we wouldn't have junk like this. But no. Instead, we just stay all quiet about it until something like this comes out. Then we all wonder why people are going to see this, or read this, or why they are getting into this. Did you know that the majority of consumers of this book were CHRISTIAN WOMEN?! Does that not say something to you? Yeah, its worldly, but this has a lot to do with the church. 

What is the church family doing about this? Are they speaking on it? Nope. It's too "sensitive” of a topic. Yeah, the sex is ‘bad’, but that's not the whole book. If we want to stop seeing this, it's time for the church to speak up. Paul talked about it way back then. Why is it so hard to talk about now?

Mothers and fathers, talk to your children about ALL of God's ways. Show them His ways by modeling a godly marriage. Older women, be mentors to the younger women and teach them about their role in life. {Hopefully, they will have teachable hearts. Many young women today do not.} When I was growing up, my mom told me to save myself so I could one day stand in front of a godly man and tell him I had saved myself for him. She was right! Let's not give up on this generation and cause them to turn to evil; perverted imitations that look nothing like the true and lovely thing that God created it to be.  Preach the Word in season and out of season, whether or not others are listening. Let's stop burying our heads in the sand and speak openly with our children and ALL who will listen.

That the generation to come might know them, 
that the children still to be born might arise 
and recount them to their children, 
that they might set their hope in God and 
not forget the works of God, 
but might keep His commandments.
Psalm 78:6, 7

Comments (42)

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The media is the major contributor to the hype on the movie. On a separate note, local news shows video of young women dressed in bridal gowns and embracing after getting married. This is video that used to be classified as pornographic, now it is being pushed out to us as mainstream and all must accept it. The more our society and government has broken down and continues to, the more we must embrace and show that we follow God's word..
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
I wonder if women who read this or watch the movie would be okay with their husbands spending an equal amount of time looking at porn on the internet. Why not? It's the same thing ladies!
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
I cringe when I see this book and movie all over the place. It's everywhere, and the enemy loves it. I was shocked when I read the majority of readers are Christian women! I refuse to read a word out of this book or see any part of the movie. It's only giving the devil a foothold. Disgusting. I have a beautiful daughter who just turned 4, and it makes me nervous as to what is going to be the norm in society when she grows up. Society in general is lost and it needs God and His saving grace more than ever. Your blog is a breath of fresh air! I pray I can model to my daughter the way God would want and that she'll have the strength to stand for God, not evil. I remember Michelle Duggar saying to her kids, "You wouldn't put garbage in your mouth, don't put it in your mind either." It's just common sense.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
My mom always taught me that if Satan can get to the mother of the family, he automatically has his grasp on the whole family. No wonder he attacks women. He is sneaky about it too - disguising it as a romantic book/movie. I saw a comment somewhere yesterday of a woman who said she loves the book because it has such a great story line. Justification paves the pathway to hell!
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
When this book became so popular a few years ago, even Ellen did a skit about this on her show. It really did confuse me as to why it was so popular. Now that Hollywood has made a movie the fans of the book will rush to the theatre i am sure. So for us as Christians it leaves us or to me at least wonder again why the popularity. I admit i read the first book, but that was it. I had no interest in the second and third book. I am not sure the fascination woman have with book???? I try so hard everyday to protect my eyes, temptation is all around us. Everywhere!!! When i see something or hear something that is deemed to be inappropriate i am strong enough to brush it off with prayer. My focus in a sexual way is solely focused on my wife. I don't need fifty shades, porn or any scantily glad woman to entice my mind.
The bible does give us direction for the marital bed as to whats appropriate and not. To me our minds have a filter system and if i deem inappropriate i can filter it away
But i will say this, we can not unsee anything that we have seen. We need though to be very careful as sometimes filter systems get clogged I don't see anything wrong with a little role play and fun under the sheets, BUT this book and movie seem to have exploited what is acceptable and what is not!! Thats my 2 cents
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
Lori you absolutely nailed it in your comment above!!!!
People are looking or fulfillment in all the WRONG places!! It is in Christ alone. We need to be putting our energies into our marriages, not outside temptations!!! Everything we have and we need is found in Christ, except too many of us live for the moment and forget about whats important by succumbing to watch a movie we know we shouldn't, or read a book that we know we shouldn't If we don't filter out the garbage it will soon consume us
First I'd like to share that www.pullingbacktheshades.com is an amazing resource to help fight this new social norm. I wholeheartedly agree with you and have written at least three posts discussing sex, marriage, and why erotica (also known as "romance novels" or "mommy porn") is wrong. Women that read these novels (and are now going to watch a movie with a ridiculous low rating of R) are NO DIFFERENT then men who sit and watch porn online. If we'd have a cow catching our husbands watching porn, or our dads, we shouldn't be the type of women who read it.

And I'm not yet 30, so im in between generations I guess. I'm fighting for mine and those younger than me, I'm thankful I have older ladies that let me learn from them. I feel like my "normal" should be the norm. We just need more women to speak up, like you did!
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
My Pastor *just* preached this same message last week. Hopefully the message is received. Great post. Thanks for sharing.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
I don't know anything about this book but it sounds like the author grew up in Satans playground! Good Heavens! I had 9 kids and I never needed anything like this to make my husband interested even if I wasn't. We need to get the bible back into everyones homes and get this kind of trash out of them!
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
I will echo Lori's words above "Anything a couple wants to do in the privacy of their own bedroom is acceptable as long as it doesn't physically violate the other one's body or conscience."

Christians should not be prudish in our view of sex, nor place legalistic limits on couples who enjoy a fulling sex life... but when sex gets paraded out in public, and it needs handcuffs and whips to make it exciting, we know it is wrong. Part of societies problem is the need to constantly escalate their sexual experience to new and heightened levels as is shown in the movies. The make-believe of the movies now becomes a fantasy for some to try and experience if they too can fulfill such desires of the flesh. If the thrill is fulfilling, it does not stay fulfilling for long, and soon demands an even greater rush of sexual excitement with greater exploration of the limits. Little do most recognize that the flesh's appetite can never be fully satisfied once you embark on the chase to do so. We as Believers must say "no" to the flesh, and "yes" to the Spirit who lives inside of us when our appetites gets aroused in ways that do nothing that is honorable to the Lord Jesus.

Just as any addiction develops slowly over time then needs more to feed it, so too a sexual addiction needs its greater thrills to keep satisfied. The Christian is to be content, and not keep looking for something outside of what they have in their own marriage bed. This is why many Christian women are closet readers of 50 Shades. because they enjoy just the thought of a thrill of vulnerability, when they should be looking for this in the loving arms of their husband. Often unwilling to yield their will to the vulnerability to their husband's loving leadership, they will gladly fantasize instead of such vulnerability in sex, often thinking of another mystery man.

I think the Christian site that makes the most Bible sense when it comes to the do's and don'ts of sex in Christian marriage can be found here at The Marriage Bed: http://site.themarriagebed.com/start-here
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
Totally agree with you Lori. I haven't read the book but I read that the male protagonist is not only a sexual pervert but also scares, frightens and psychologically abuses the female protagonist. I'm really scared for the girls that will read this book and think that this is love.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
My only quibble with this post Lori is that you seem to think it's yung people driving the buzz. It isn't. It's married and middle aged women who bought the book, and it will be married and middle aged women who drive the ticket sales.

This isn;t about young people who haven't been taught. This is licentious adults. Full grown adults, not young adults. I'm sure there will be a percentage of young people patronizing but they are not the driving force.

Els
4 replies · active 529 weeks ago
To be a true Christian is to be living a life that is "Christ-like" and those women(or men) that are reading this trash are certainly NOT striving to be like my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!
So, let's don't even degrade His name by labeling them as "Christians", but let us say that they profess to be Christians.
This book sickens me. He makes the young girl sign a bdsm contract?? Any guy who forces you to sign any contract regarding the bedroom isn't worth the paper it's written on. (Marriage is a COVENANT, NOT A CONTRACT) stupid girl. Evil man and even stupider girl she is living with.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
I gave so many Christian friends that waited in line to buy tickets to go to this movie. When I say something about how dirty and unchristian it is I get looks and told it's 2015 for goodness sakes.
Ugh. These same ladies watch the Bachelor with their young daughters. To me I think we have lost this generation. It's the norm they say. Sickens me.
Lori, I am curious which generation you think is lost. Because I don't believe it is just Millennials who are lost. Elspeth is right, many Gen X and Boomer women like this book too. The truth is that the past four to five generations were lost, and long ago. We are only just now realizing it. Or rather, we are only now acknowledging it- the evidence was there for a long time, most just pretended it wasn't.

Honestly, given what has been peddled in Christian circles for the past few generations, why are we surprised when books like this are popular among "Christians?" Most Christians chose to love the world, not God, long ago.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
Agree! The hype of this book/ movie is disgusting! Our culture is so hypocritical. We love in a crazy feminist nation, yet this is OK? I'm not a feminist, but I would think feminist wound be appalled by exploiting women like this. Yet, many of those feminist embrace it.
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
Lori

This film is being hugely publicised here in the UK. I was driving this morning and every autobillboard at the side of the road in a 10 minute drive had the publicity poster for this film. As I drove I just prayed continually for this sad lost world and that the film would 'bomb' and anyone looking at the billboard would not be influenced by it. We live in wicked times and I look for the return of the Lord.
Blessings to you
Helen UK
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
There's some irony here.... I've read that many liberals will boycott the movie because it degrades women (true from what I understand -- haven't read the book). Maybe we can unite on a common cause! Kind of like Republicans and Democrats coming together...
1 reply · active 529 weeks ago
This morning our local country radio kick 106 was giving out passes to the premiere of fifty shades. Come on, its everywhere we turn, turn your filter system on high!!!!
Very true! My mom was a Christian, but very old school. She never talked to me about sex and it left a big hole in my life. What I learned was from very trashy sources and unreliable friends, and it did a LOT of damage. As the mother of 2 girls, I am working to remedy this. Even though my husband is not a believer, he has agreed to let me teach them what I now value: sex with marriage, love with commitment, and God as the center. FYI, there is a book I recently reviewed called "Pulling Back the Shades" for Christian women. It's a response to 50 Shades and offers help to women who are being hurt by this book/movie.
We dont need another Hype of 50 Shades... but real Rolemodels in Marriages after Gods Heart and Design. My Wife and i are 34 Years into our marriage. The last 5 years where the best in all aspects. Thank you Lori that you and your Husband are just such a vital example. Conttinue the good Work. God bless you and your family from Solingen, Germany
Just as any addiction develops slowly over time then needs more to feed it, so too a sexual addiction needs its greater thrills to keep satisfied. The Christian is to be content, and not keep looking for something outside of what they have in their own marriage bed. This is why many Christian women are closet readers of 50 Shades. because they enjoy just the thought of a thrill of vulnerability, when they should be looking for this in the loving arms of their husband. Often unwilling to yield their will to the vulnerability to their husband's loving leadership, they will gladly fantasize instead of such vulnerability in sex, often thinking of another mystery man.

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