Her
husband decided to leave her and cling to a Jezebel. His wife was controlling
and this Jezebel made him feel desirable. He had papers drawn up to give
his wife the home and some other things and another paper for divorcing her. She signed the
papers to get the home and things but refused to sign the divorce papers.
He
began seeing a change in his wife and became "spooked" about this
Jezebel lady, yet he still had another affair with even another woman. However, after two long years of hurt
and separation, Jimmie Ruth Matthews welcomed her husband home. This was based
on obedience, not on strong feelings.
She told him, “Lorne, I don’t feel anything for you.”
He said, “Well, you know, I don’t feel anything for you either.” We both agreed that it was right for us to be together as
husband and wife. I remember, Nancy, when I finally came home, I began
to see that she was a changed woman. I studied my wife. I didn’t see the same person—this clutchy,
fearful woman that was so blanketing and mothering and controlling wasn’t
there. She’s the same strong-willed person, but the beauty of
coming to the place where . . . She sat down with me and we talked, and she
said, “I’ve learned something. I’ve
learned my significance. With you or without you, I am significant in Christ. I
am somebody because I know Christ as my Savior.”
She said, "I remember laying by Lorne and praying, 'Lord,
this was not our idea. This was Your plan. I submit to You, first of all, and I
submit to my husband because I know it honors You.' So it was years of just walking the Word."
He
said, "She submitted to the Lord, and she submitted to
me. I hear about all these ministers who are falling and getting
away from their wives. The greatest thing I believe in the world is the power
of influence of a godly woman to love her man no matter what, and I have been
given that treasure, and I am so grateful...The sign language has a sign for sweethearts. You'd think that sweethearts would be fingers all entwined together, but what their sign is is two strong personalities together facing each other. "
Nancy: You’re putting your fists together.
Something
interesting that Nancy Leigh DeMoss' guest brought up during this powerful program was this
statement: "When I started studying the patterns of covenant and the
New Testament plan, I just could not see that was what God was saying in the
Word {Matthew 19:9}. The Scripture they use says, 'Except it be for
fornication.' So people think when a person has a mate that he's committing
adultery, then what the Scripture is saying is that you can go ahead and get a
divorce. But actually, the Scripture is referring to a Jewish betrothal
pattern." Nancy
agreed with this interpretation and had remarked earlier, "Marriage
is a covenant. It's a pledge to be faithful unto death, regardless of what circumstances my arise." {Not sure I agree with this interpretation, but I find it very interesting.}
These
are hard words for many women in difficult marriages. I have mentored women
whose husbands were having affairs. These men are in bondage to their sin. A
godly wife who waits for her husband can be a huge testimony to the world and to her husband of
God's faithfulness to all of them, even when they sin over and over again. She may even be
the vessel God uses to save her husband's soul from damnation. I have seen and heard this
happen too many times to not trust God and know that His ways are by far the best
and most sure way for restoration in a marriage.
God
allowed divorce only because of the hardness of their hearts. He hates divorce
and He knows the destruction it causes on everyone involved and around the
couple who divorces. If only women could have an eternal vision and know that
by staying with their husband they are sanctifying their husband. Yes, it is
very difficult, but eternally worth it.
What therefore God
hath joined together,
let not man put asunder.
Mark 10:9
