Men who have wives who stay at home all day taking care of the children and home become "pampered queens" according to this blog writer. Bashing men who work hard and provide for their families by calling them "pampered queens" is completely acceptable in our day and age, plus arguing against women being home full-time since it "not natural" for one parent, namely the woman, to stay at home with young children anymore. Yep, the Bible is no longer relevant for today's women since we live lives so differently than generations in the past. The author states that since we no longer live communally together, the biblical model is no longer credible because "women are limited in their scope and all too often reduced to the proverbial doormat; children are deprived of the necessary range of adult input and child socialization; men have a tendency to become pampered queens prancing about like the 'important' person in the house."
No, what she thinks is "natural" is to go to a job from nine to five every day fighting the traffic to get there; working in a sterile environment with white walls, no kitchen and no family room; being ordered around by someone who isn't your boss and working under a lot of stress and deadlines; wolfing down a pop tart and coffee for breakfast; grabbing a hamburger and fries for lunch at the nearest fast food restaurant; driving through a pizza place on the way home to grab dinner for the family; running to the preschool or after care place to pick up the children; going home, eating dinner, helping the children with homework, doing a bit of housework, kissing your children good night and falling into bed too exhausted to do anything with your husband. Then you wake up to an alarm the next morning and begin all over again.
This is the "natural" life that feminists have fought so hard for. Since homemakers were bored at home, they thought this "natural" life would be so much better. It isn't in any way, shape, or form. It cannot compare to waking up to a crying baby when they are little and having the time to nurse and cuddle your baby; fixing a nutritious breakfast for your husband and children; spending the morning cleaning up, teaching your children to help you and homeschooling them, then eating lunch together in the backyard if the weather is warm enough. After lunch, having a quiet time for everyone in their rooms for an hour or two where the older ones can read and the younger ones can sleep. {Mommy should probably sleep as well.} After this, reading to your children, doing the laundry together, and then preparing dinner together if they are older; greeting your husband happily at the door and having a nutritious dinner together; putting the children to bed early so you can have some quiet and special time with your husband. Your husband then feels like a pampered king as the God-ordained head of the household.
Yes, I exaggerated both sides of the coin to make a point but I'm sure you get the point I am trying to make. The saddest part of this post was in the comment section where the author wrote, "I've seen quite a few Christian wives in this role. None of them seem happy or fulfilled - although they do their best to pretend it's all fine, good and the good God's perfect plan." What's so sad about this is the truth of it. Many Christians live their lives in an unhappy and unjoyful state no matter what they are doing. This is wrong. We should be the most joyful people around recalling all that the Lord has done for us and finding our strength in Him. He commands that we rejoice always; happy is that people, that is in such a case: yea, happy is that people, whose God is the Lord {Psalm 144:15}.
It's not an option, women. Don't live according to your feelings and emotions since they often lie to you. Instead, be in the Word daily to remind yourself who you are in Christ and all the riches you have in Him. Sing praises to His holy name. Listen to godly teachers and preachers. Fill your mind with only good things. You don't need to listen to all the bad news out there. On days when you're exhausted and the children are sick, "do the next thing" as Elisabeth Elliot wrote, and remind yourself that this will soon pass.
It's not an option, women. Don't live according to your feelings and emotions since they often lie to you. Instead, be in the Word daily to remind yourself who you are in Christ and all the riches you have in Him. Sing praises to His holy name. Listen to godly teachers and preachers. Fill your mind with only good things. You don't need to listen to all the bad news out there. On days when you're exhausted and the children are sick, "do the next thing" as Elisabeth Elliot wrote, and remind yourself that this will soon pass.
If the world sees homemakers unhappy and complaining in their God-ordained role as wife, mother and homemaker, why should they want to be one? On the other hand, if they see homemakers joyful, smiling and telling others how much they love caring for their husbands, children, and homes, it just may change a few job-weary women's minds.
You are not a doormat; you are the best person to give adult input to your children and teach them how to get along with others; your husband is not a prancing queen {prancing queens don't work all day to provide for their families} and your life is not unnatural. It's God's will for you. Love your role as wife, mother and homemaker. Happiness is a choice and everyday wake up and chose to be happy. Also, men are already beat up in our society today. Let's not be one of those who do the same but appreciate our husbands who work hard to provide for us. Pamper them as the king of the household for this makes you his queen!
He maketh the barren woman to keep house,
and to be a joyful mother of children.
Psalm 113:9
***From Rory from the Joey + Rory Blog: "When we recorded that song {That's Important to Me}, I think some people in music industry thought it was too simple-minded, not cutting edge enough. I felt just the opposite. I believed it was a bold statement – a woman singing about feeding her family a home-cooked meal, staying out of debt, or trying to be the best mother she can be. In a culture that seems to scream ‘more, more’ and ‘faster, faster’… I knew Joey wasn’t just singing about what was important to her, she was singing about what’s important to millions of wives and mothers and girls all around the world." AMEN!
He maketh the barren woman to keep house,
and to be a joyful mother of children.
Psalm 113:9
***From Rory from the Joey + Rory Blog: "When we recorded that song {That's Important to Me}, I think some people in music industry thought it was too simple-minded, not cutting edge enough. I felt just the opposite. I believed it was a bold statement – a woman singing about feeding her family a home-cooked meal, staying out of debt, or trying to be the best mother she can be. In a culture that seems to scream ‘more, more’ and ‘faster, faster’… I knew Joey wasn’t just singing about what was important to her, she was singing about what’s important to millions of wives and mothers and girls all around the world." AMEN!
Logging you in...
marie · 477 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 477 weeks ago
peoplegrowing 1p · 477 weeks ago
I did come around to Christianity eventually, and I am now a confirmed Catholic, but it was just these kinds of conversations that first attracted me to listening to a Christian viewpoint at all. Don't underestimate the influence of the witness of a house ordered in respect to God!
Lori Alexander 122p · 477 weeks ago
Sue · 477 weeks ago
Thejoyfilledwife · 477 weeks ago
I notice that our family is healthiest and happiest all around when I limit my outside obligations and give plenty of time for getting things done at home. It allows me the time to really teach my children their schooling and how to run a household with patience, instead of rushing everyone because we have play dates and events to attend every day. Most women are "yes" women and they agree to the things other ladies flatter them to participate in. Their family really suffers for this. People who know me know that I am VERY busy at home and helping my husband in many capacities, so I don't get the constant requests for leading this or starting that or taking on this or that. That has been a huge weight off my shoulders and allows me to really focus on my first ministry: my family. Women who are not enjoying their time at home, I believe, are either doing too many outside activities, spending too much time online, or haven't sought contentment in their role because they compare themselves to their working mom friends, who may look happy on their Facebook posts, but usually live a very unfulfilled life because its outside of God's calling for them. The grass is not greener on the other side. Joy is a choice.
Mrs. G. · 477 weeks ago
When you homeschool, people seem to get so concerned that your children have enough social activity. Our kids are involved in a few things, but honestly, they are more than happy to spend time at home as a family. Being that most extracurricular activities now take place in the evenings in order to cater to working moms, our children would rather spend that time with Dad when he gets home from work and having dinner together as a family!
Thejoyfilledwife · 477 weeks ago
You are doing great work, Mrs G. Since your family is your first ministry and you are focusing on that above all, you are really being a great example of living out the Word. I am a firm believer that if a decision is made to take on service outside the home, it should be done as a family instead of separating the family unit.
Mrs. G. · 477 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 477 weeks ago
pamelambc 33p · 477 weeks ago
Mrs.M · 477 weeks ago
The husband was ultimately responsible for providing, but his wife was able to be a true help meet and work along side him and since she answered to no boss but her husband she was still able to be the primary caregiver of their children and take a break anytime she needed to go upstairs or inside and nurse a baby, or put young ones down for a nap, or stop work early to go in and fix dinner.
Schooling was done by the parents, often mostly during the winter and the children worked in the family business as well which was a hands on real world education (and which is a huge reason why generations of the past considered large families a blessing, because the children contributed to the family economy and were considered an asset, unlike today where children only consume family resources and are considered an economic liability).
This is the ideal we see lived out by the Proverbs 31 woman, whose first priority was her husband and children, and as part of that she was able to generate income to supplement her husband's provision. So in the past there was not a distinction between a "stay at home woman" and a "working woman" because pretty much all women were home AND also contributing to the family economy alongside their husband and children.
The Industrial Revolution moved "work" outside the home into factories and corporations and the men followed. Pretty soon children left the house too for public schooling and since their husbands, children, and the majority of income producing activity had left their homes, women were easy prey to be convinced by the feminists that they should leave too.
So once upon a time women really were able to "have it all". Unfortunately the way our society and culture is structured for most of us it is a "one or the other choice", EITHER exercising our skills and talents to produce income to supplement our husband's main provision, OR caring for our families and homes. Unless a husband is able to intentionally create a home business that can support the family and allow opportunities for the wife and children to participate. The Botkin family, of which the two sisters giving the talk are part of, is a great example of this.
http://westernconservatory.com/store/free This was the talk I listened to, it is a free download (you have to scroll down to it, it is called Dominion Oriented Femininity (dominion here referring to the dominion mandate given to Adam and Eve to go forth and multiply, cultivate and subdue the earth).
http://westernconservatory.com/products/developin... This was another excellent talk on the same subject, developing your gifts within the family economy while staying at home. This one is longer and more in depth, however you do have to purchase the download for a few dollars (although I thought it was worth every penny.)
2happy4 66p · 477 weeks ago
Even after the industrial revolution our country was still mostly agrarian up until about 60 years ago. At that time the men ran their own farm industries. Their employers were there children and their wives were their "right-hand [wo]man".
So this blog post that Lori linked to and is referring to is SO very off base. Her solution is to go further from the idea and not closer to it.
girlwithadragonflytattoo 36p · 477 weeks ago
It might seem silly, but I was actually hoping to have some good dialogue with her, the comment she quoted was from my post "Just Do the Next Thing" found here http://girlwithadragonflytattoo.com/2016/01/12/ju...
So many of the moms I know with young children like me feel really discouraged at times, it is SO great that we have women that are writing things like you do! So thank you so much!
-Stephanie
Lori Alexander 122p · 477 weeks ago
Guest · 477 weeks ago
Society does look down on us when we remain at home, but our husband's don't. At least, mine doesn't. From what I've seen, most men love to have their wives at home when it is possible for them to do so.
darrengineer2016blog 0p · 477 weeks ago