Monday, June 22, 2015

The Dark Side of Feminism and Equality


When I have mentioned before that men and women are not equal and never will be no matter how much feminists want this to be true, I get scolded. Yes, I know we are equal in value and worth and in the eyes of the Lord, just as children and parents are equal in worth, yet they aren't equal in authority and many others things. I believe the same is with men and women. Men can never be women and women can never be men no matter how hard they try. God designed us differently in the way that we think, respond, hormones, size, stature, strength, anatomy, etc. for wonderful purposes. 

An article has just been written by a former editor of Cosmopolitan Magazine who thought she "had it all" but was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Large numbers of today's educated, middle-class women are more stressed, more prone to depression and drinking more than ever before. They are leaving it too late to settle down and have children, and ending up alone - and lonely. Lifestyle changes that are concomitant with equality, and which women like me once welcomed, are taking a toll that seems to grow greater.

I love what Elizabeth Elliot had to say about this topic, "A Christian woman's true freedom lies on the other side of a very small gate - humble obedience - but that gate leads out into a largeness of life undreamed of by liberators of the world, to a place where the God-given differentiation between the sexes is not obfuscated but celebrated, where our inequalities are seen as essential to the image of God, for it is in male and female, in male as male and female as female, not as two identical and interchangeable halves, that the image is manifested."

God is very clear about the roles He has given to males and females and what is best for each sex. People will ALWAYS suffer when they depart from their God-given role. Is it any wonder that in any given year, women appear to experience higher overall rates of psychological disorders than men? Women were never meant to be the protectors and providers. We are not physically or emotionally built for these things. We are built for nurturing and taking care of our family and home. Look at the female body compared to the male. Study the difference in the brain and emotions. Take blood and compare the hormones. We're different, so different from each other and God made us different for a reason; for the good of the family and society when our roles are followed as ordained by Him. The problem, I believe, is that you can't over-ride the inbuilt instincts in men to be the protectors and providers, while women - however career-minded they are - are still natural nurturers and nest-builders.

This article wasn't written by a Christian nor from a Christian perspective, yet she claims that while there's much to celebrate in terms of women's achievements, the price paid for equality is rising exponentially. I don't think the price of straying from our God-given roles is worth it in any way. The cost has been way too high and those who have suffered the most are the most innocent, the children. You see, she believes that the things that have come out of the feminist movement have been good, whereas, I believe they are VERY bad. Putting commitment on hold to concentrate on your career, as well as to experience multiple relationships before settling down, has liberated women from the shackles of economic dependence and enriched their lives socially and sexually. And, of course, for some women, Mr. Right comes along in their mid-30s at the moment they're ready to commit and there's a happy-ever-after ending. But a growing number of women are finding themselves alone and unhappy. In a woman's sexual freedom, she fails to mention the consequences of numerous venereal diseases, infertility, and even death for some. Many women pursue careers and gain a mountain of debt that prevents them from being able to stay home and raise their precious babies so she is still believing the lies feminism promises. This doesn't sound like freedom from the shackles to me.

She also believed the lie that men want powerful and strong women who can provide for themselves. To her dismay, she found out the opposite was true. All had grown-up children, all were the principal breadwinners, and in four out of five cases the men left for younger and far less ambitious women. I reckon they thought that the wives they left would be just fine without them; that they'd tough it out. These women found out that their power diminished their husband's role of being protector and provider.

This author's marriage broke down when she was 56 years old. My marriage broke down around the same time. I was 56 and my son 19. My husband, who had always supported me in my career, made the remark: "After your breakdown, you became tougher. I think it was good for you to toughen up, but it wasn't good for me." A study revealed that those husbands who are more financially dependent on their wives are more unfaithful. We can't think we can escape from God's ordained roles and there won't be terrible consequences.

She sums up her article with these sobering words:  You could call it a work in progress, but unless we acknowledge the impacts of change on our physical and mental health and relationships, rather than dismissing them as scaremongering and anti-feminist, women will continue to pay a very high price indeed for so-called equality.

The ONLY answer to this problem is to go back to God's ordained path for the sexes. I see way too many young Christian women with higher education who know more than me and God's ways. They have feminist's tendencies that lead them away from fully embracing God's plan for women. They can't help but learn these feminist's lies in the present educational systems of today, including Christian institutions. It grieves my heart. I don't understand why they don't have "Keepers at Home," "Homemaking," "Child Raising" and "Marriage" courses in all the Christian colleges since these are along the line of what God wants for women, not high-powered careers that they are stuck with for the rest of their lives that keep them away from their home and marriage.

Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, 
and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, 
and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. 
Jeremiah 6:16

Comments (16)

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It may not be in the cards for me to get married. I've had anyone interested in marrying me. I'm good natured. Not overweight. Good hygiene. Etc... I have to accept God might not have marriage planned for my life.

I do feel called to help those with mental disorders. Especially women. Maybe even women in prison, who have different needs from male prisoners. I'm currently in college for human services technology and humanities now.

I have not had to take out loans yet. I know if I do, it will be a game changer. If I take out loans, and then do get married, staying home may not be an option anymore. I wish God's plan for me would clearer. It is hard to know what to do.

I enjoy reading many different women's narratives. I find the variety of perceptives interesting. If I do work with women in prison, I know reading and understanding different people is important. I will most likely work with women who have had a lot of trauma in their lives.

So many need to focus on being mothers. I've been reading about prisons that allow women to keep their babies with them in prison. (There are a handful in the US, but in some countries it is the norm) For some it is first time in their lives they have been able to concentrate on being a parent. The stress of their lives made it impossible to mother. I don't have the solutions. But I have a desire to try and help.
2 replies · active 509 weeks ago
Sounds great, Laruaashley. God's instruction to women who are not married, "The unmarried woman cares for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit" {1 Corinthians 7:34.
Certainly not getting married is an option for any young Christian man or young woman, and they must stay open to God's will. If the desires of your heart are to be married, make sure to make yourself available to meet young men, and always remember that what God calls us to at this time of life is not always what God will call us to in a year, a decade or even five decades.

Two of my Christian School teachers were not married until they got into their 50's. They joyfully served the Lord on the mission field, and God blessed them with great husbands later in life who helped care for them the rest of their lives.
Great post! Thank you Lori.
Very good and informative post, Lori. Thank you!
1 reply · active 509 weeks ago
You're welcome, Joann!
It's always great when those in "the world" figure out that the world's ways don't work!
1 reply · active 509 weeks ago
I agree, Susan. He created us, therefore, He know what's best fo us.
This resonates with what I read yesterday in Dr. Laura's book, "In Praise of Stay-At-Home Moms." Highly recommend!
3 replies · active 509 weeks ago
Thank you, Mrsgryce! I didn't know she wrote such a book. I will have to read it!
It is from 2009. The paperback was originally $16.99 (Canadian), but I got it at the bookstore recently for $2.95 because it was "not very popular." Go figure! ;)
I ordered it from Amazon yesterday and it costs $4 because of shipping. The book was only 3 cents!
Powerful post on one of the most important topics of our day. Thanks for taking on the challenge. And it is not only some women that are of this mindset. Many men support feminism and all men and women have been influenced by it in ways we don’t fully recognize. Further, we tend to think that the conservative church is free from its influence but pay attention to sermons or Bible studies or authors and essentially all of them use “equality” at some point to describe the husband and wife relationship and that continues to confuse the function of each spouse. It really takes putting on scripture in a renewed way to get this all back on track.
2 replies · active 422 weeks ago
It's heartbreaking, Dave, how difficult it is to find preachers and teachers of the Word who aren't afraid to teach it boldly and unashamedly. The feminist have given to much power to women and now people are afraid of them.
Joseph Cason's avatar

Joseph Cason · 422 weeks ago

As a man, I can say that attempting to address this issue will get you burned at the stake. Talk about Eve's responsibility in the fall, Bathsheba's part in David's sin, or Biblical submission and you will separate the girls from the girls quick. I have found that nothing will silence a feminist faster than a Godly woman saying what you have said here. A man could not write this article. Thank you
You have a crisp writing style. It's simple and appealing. Keep up this blog. I hope many women (and men like myself) will discover it and be empowered by your words reminding us of the truths in the Bible.

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