Thursday, January 17, 2013

Gluttony And Pleasing Your Man


An interesting study is to look at the times when drunkenness and gluttony are used together in the Scriptures.  Both drunkenness and gluttony are from the same basic weakness ~ self-indulgence.

If you are a believer, you are filled with the Holy Spirit.  A fruit of the Holy Spirit is self-control.  You must use the self-control that God tells you that you have to control yourself.  If you are taught as a child to control yourself {say "no" to yourself}, it is much easier as an adult.

I recently started reading a blog written by a woman who truly is seeking to be submissive to her husband and her God in every area of her life.  She has been amazed at the beauty of true submission .  I recently asked her a question about her desire to get in shape and this is what she wrote ~

And this gets into your questions about losing weight. I have always held an awareness of my weight. I have a threshold that I would reach and through disgust I would work to lose the weight. It wasn't until I stopped rebelling to RLB {her husband} that I committed to a body pleasing to him.

Never before have I been this committed and this focused. It has completely come from obedience to God's command to submit to my husband. The pop psyche "you've got to do it for yourself" is wrong. Myself, by myself sucks. Without submission, I succumb to temptation easily. I hadn't considered my gluttony until I was in submission.

A friend of mine told me many years ago that her husband didn't like sex because he had low testosterone.  She was overweight.  Years later, she lost a ton of weight and got into shape.  She told me her husband won't leave her alone now!

Would your husband like you to lose weight?  Ask him.  We are called in Scripture to obey our husbands in everything!  This is not taught today.  Women do not want to hear this but if your husband would love for you to lose weight, you need to do it for him.

Go on the Paleo diet.  Cut out all the sugar and desserts.  Go on long walks everyday.  Practice portion control.  Stop drinking alcohol.  Do whatever you need to do to please your man.  Christ died to free you from sin.  He tells us we have everything for life and godliness.  Start believing Him!

Now that you realize gluttony is indeed a sin, you are filled with the Holy Spirit who gives you self-control, and your husband probably would love for you to be in shape {Some men like some meat on their women. You must ask him how much meat he likes!}, you have no excuse to overeat and be out of shape!

You can do it!  God tells us His commands are not burdensome.  Speak affirming words to yourself consistently, "I CAN do this because He works powerfully inside of me!"

Be not be with heavy drinkers of wine,
or with gluttonous eaters of meat; 
For the heavy drinker and the glutton will come to poverty.
Proverbs 23:20,21

Comments (36)

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Great post! I agree with you, though this isn't a popular opinion to have now days (as I'm sure you know). The frustrating thing for me, is that although I work very hard and weigh the same as I did before I had babies, my body looks nothing like it did! That is really hard on me. My husband loves my body though, and that is what I have to go with. He actually gets annoyed when I am down on myself. If he's happy, I should be too!
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
I am worried about the blog you referenced: http://sarahsdaughterblog.blogspot.com/2013/01/po...
Is this lady's husband saying he thinks the church should condone polygamy? I am honestly not sure, the post isn't written very clearly...but if he is I don't really want to be taking advice from that blog.
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
Tiffany, men lie to their wives about their wives appearance. Especially men that have been duped by feminism. Get in shape. Throw iron around. Don't settle for him saying, "no" to that question about your jeans and how they make your butt look. He already knows you don't want the truth.
2 replies · active 636 weeks ago
Sarah's Daughter's avatar

Sarah's Daughter · 636 weeks ago

@Anne,
Churches today have become very accepting of divorce and remarriage. This is polygamy. Especially if a man is financially supporting the first wife while he provides for the second. Our no fault divorce culture and laws have sanctioned polygamy. And Christians have fallen lock step into agreement with it.
In today's marriages that are void of biblical submission, a man has very few options when his wife decides not to abide by her vows and the Commands of God in her marriage. Dalrock and The Woman and the Dragon have been having excellent discussions about this very thing.
When a man is in a sexless marriage he should be able to let that wife know she is in rebellion and unless she comes to obedience, he will be interviewing for a second wife. Her sin is bringing him to temptation. Husbands today know that should he divorce her with the State, he will be ruined financially because the State does not care that she was at fault and denying the Covenant she made with God and the husband. The State will still punish the man.
For men to reestablish the headship of the family, this discussion needs to be had and can not be driven by women's emotions. The Church needs to abandon feminism. Marriage as the State sanctions it has to be ignored (homosexual marriage, 2nd, 3rd, 4th marriages etc.) by the Church and discussions need to start on proper ways for men to continue their mission unaffected by their wife's sin. The Church should admonish the wife who is in rebellion to God's commands and allow for the husband to put her aside until she is in submission.
In the last year, I have had two different women come to me and discuss their plans for divorce. Both times I said the following: "you're husband is quite a catch, he will not remain single. Are you ready for him to be having sex with another woman? Are you ready to have one or multiple other women in your children's lives?" Both women were horrified at the thought and are still married today. One just had another baby and the other is publicly presenting as a wife very excited about her husband.
5 replies · active 635 weeks ago
My husband cautions me all the time when he sees me getting two deserts. I like bread. :-)
I did notice when I began taking the girls to the park and walking while they played, my husband began to respond favorably to my weight loss. He's agreed to keep the girls some mornings so I could go for a bike ride alone. He does not want me to reach the weight I had when we met, my goal weight, but he does "encourage" me to loose weight. My struggle with my husband is my hair. I like it short and/or weaved. My husband likes it long and/or permed, without weave.He says it was long when we met and after we married I cut it off. Pray for me. I think long hair is boring. It's just long. No style or pizazz. Just there. Please do not find my statement offensive ladies. To each its own. Thank you God you did not say drinking wine was a sin. I drink wine, but no unto drunkedness.

Congratulations to the reader whose husbands desire was returned to her.
2 replies · active 636 weeks ago
I love this blog! As I am teaching my 5 year old daughter about self-control, I realize that I need to learn to control myself as well. I have been the mom who denies junk food to my child, but eats it after my little one goes to sleep. Much of the junk our society calls "food" is highly addictive. My daughter talks of the "God diet", which is food God gives us. Personally I find when I avoid wheat, sugar, and reduce dairy, the weight comes off. Maybe this is because junk food has these ingredients in it. I prayed to God that He would strengthen my self control, and He has been faithful! God gave us these bodies and we should take care of them. He has given us an abundance of wonderful things to eat.
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
I lost a lot of weight over a 2 year period, not only for my husband but for my own health eg blood pressure so it is important for women to do regardless of their husbands view on their weight. Their health is very important especially into older age. But husbands also need to listen their wives when they are told they are overweight, such as my husband -it works both ways. Whilst I cook healthy meals, my husband buys chips and lollies that are making him over weigh. As for my own weight loss, I reduced sugar but I never removed it, it makes dieting far too hard and much easier to slip back into old ways .

Ps submission is interesting when married to a non believer .
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
I like your perspective on staying in shape for our husbands--seeing ourselves through their eyes is an extra motivation.
Also I like to think about the things that I do as "would a real lady do this?"...overindulging in food and drink don't fit in with my definition of being "ladylike" :)
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
Oh dear! Correction....overindulging "doesn't" seem ladylike....my grammar didn't seem very ladylike there! ;)
This post is so relevant to me, as I recently finished a new book out called, 'Trim, Healthy Mama", written by two of Nancy Campbell's(Above Rubies) daughters. It is a little pricey, but it is full of excellent information and recipes. The authors also have a "Trim, Healthy Mama" blog that is good. Maybe reading the blog would be a good thing to do first to see if the book is right for you.
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
I did this today with my husband and it went way better than I expected. I've always asked him this question and he tells me that he likes me just the way that I am, but I always knew he was lying. So today I told him about what I read here and said that I was scared to hear it but I wanted to know the truth about what he wants me to look like. He was very sweet and said he didn't want me to be stick thin but wanted me to be healthy and in great shape. I thought if he was honest with me it would make me want to cry, but the way he responded was so loving and it makes me respect him even more for having the courage to be honest with me. Thanks for sharing this wonderful tip - I'm praying that I'll be able to make my husband a very happy man :-) I've already lost a little weight from eating gluten free (I was recently diagnosed with Celiac disease) but I'm looking forward to transforming my health and body following the Paleo diet and starting a running program. Thanks for sharing all of your health posts - I really enjoy learning from you!
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
Danielle B's avatar

Danielle B · 636 weeks ago

A lying husband. I hope he repented for lying. The Bible says to speak the truth in love. Lying to ones spouse is NEVER right Not sure if I could trust a man who wasn't man enough to speak the truth
1 reply · active 635 weeks ago
If a man requires that his wife lose weight to please him sexually then he does NOT agape love her like the bible requires of him. The bible does not tell women to agape love their husbands and for you to tell them to go on some fad diet to try to lose the weight they gained giving birth the the children she's given than husband is very wrong. My husband is turned on by me no matter what size I am. He is not lying to me when he tells my I am beautiful or sexy even though I am 25 lbs larger than I was when I married him. I have given him four children and he doesn't expect me to be the same size I was twenty years ago. He thinks the increase in my hips and belly are sexy because I belong to him and he loves me no matter what I look like. I turn him on because I'm his wife and his one true love and passion. That is the agape love that the the says men are to have for their wives. He made vows to love me no matter what and getting fat doesn't count as a reason not to show physical affection for a wife. What if a husband gets fat? Are we then allowed to tell him he needs to get thin and sexy to turn us on again?
1 reply · active 636 weeks ago
What about men who have gained weight and are now out-of-shape and unattractive? Shouldn't they lose weight for their wives or does it not matter?
OK men out there.... J. Beth has a point ... let's get in shape!

Of course men should be trying to look good for their spouse and stay healthy so they can live a long and disease free life.

It is not really the point of the post, but as the leader of our family I have asked Lori to hold me accountable for staying within a certain maximum range for weight. She is to ask me if I behaved myself and ate reasonably on my trips and there are a few things we both agree she should question me on and help me with when we eat out... like no more than two pieces of white bread, no matter how tasty it can be :{.

Accountability for weight and a variety of issues in a marriage should go both ways, but accountability only works if both partners agree to practice it. The idea is to establish together good and acceptable health guidelines and also decide how he wants you to help hold him accountable … and always with a smile, not a frown.

Just knowing your spouse is going to ask is a good form of motivation, but apart from his allowing you some forms of discipline, you can only say it once and drop it. It would be nice if he would agree that a third piece a bread means an extra mile on the walk the next day, or having to do extra dishes the next night, then let's see how important that piece of bread's fleeting moment of pleasure really is to him.

Some men want accountability... so ask him if you can help and assure him you will not nag, but just function within the rules he sets up to help him live right and be healthy.
christabelle's avatar

christabelle · 635 weeks ago

I am currently trying to loose 20 pounds as i am overweight and i dont like it. Please pray for me.
That scripture about meat and wine is a challenge for me, because meat and wine are weight LOSS foods for me. When that's just about all I consume, the weight thing is easier to control. The supposedly healthier fruits, grains, beans, etc. fatten me up.
I completely agree with everything you said! My husband likes my weight within a certain range and I've kept it there for our two years of marriage. Pregnancy is of course an exception, but I did not use it as an excuse to eat everything in sight. It brings me great joy that my husband is proud of the way I look.

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