Monday, January 7, 2013

Contentious About His Hobbies?

During my life, I have had several friends whose dads loved to fix things around the house, garden, and do "productive" things in their free time. Then my friends married men who weren't like that and called them lazy even though they were good providers. They eventually divorced them. It was heartbreaking and their lives were difficult.

 One of the worst things you can do to your hubby is to be contentious about his hobbies. Don’t tell him he’s wasting time doing something he loves. Don’t hate the things he does. Video games, movies, TV, sports, reading, collecting things… are all ways he de-stresses from life.

His life is stressful, maybe not filled with the same stress as yours, but still just as stressful. I know, I know. He’s preoccupied ALL THE TIME. When is it MY time? Let him have his fun, don’t begrudge him, and see how much he appreciates you. You don’t have to like the same things he does, but take interest in them anyway.

Ask questions about his video games,  favorite football team, and what movie or books he wants next. Try to be part of his life. Don’t make him bend to be perfect for yours. Love your man and he’ll love you back. Be his best friend, or become it if you aren't.  {Yes, I’m a minority in “hubby is awesome, love who he is” thinking and it makes me sad because it works wonders when you practice it.}

This was a comment on another blog that was discussing husbands watching video games and wives feeling neglected. You must develop some things you like to do in your free time, if you have any!  Mothers of children won't have much free time and will probably give it to their children but we must not try to change our husbands or make them feel guilty for what they enjoy doing.

May the God of endurance and encouragement
grant you to live in such harmony with one another,
in accord with Christ Jesus.
Romans 15:5