Yes, I have been in rebellion lately. There is something Ken does that was bothering me. I felt like he scolds me once in awhile. I asked him if he would stop scolding me. I didn't like it. He told me he was "correcting" me because he felt I could be inconsiderate at times.
I move fast. I talk fast. I don't notice things sometimes. I am inconsiderate at times but I fought him on this. I didn't want him telling me what to do and correcting me. I felt like a child. So we went back and forth for a few days.
Finally, the Lord captured my attention. I was in rebellion. Plain and simple. I didn't want to obey Ken in everything. I didn't want to listen to his corrections. I wasn't being a wise woman for a wise woman takes rebuke.
I write something on my facebook page every morning for the women who follow me to encourage them in their roles as wives and mothers. I wrote this the other day ~
Criticism can increase your potential for growth mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Until you learn to accept criticism, you may never learn who you truly are. It is in criticism that you will learn your weaknesses and the things you need to change.
You all must realize that I am writing these words for me as much as I am writing them for you. Ken knows me better than anybody else. He can see my faults clearly and my desire is to become a godly woman that obeys God in everything.
Simply changing my perspective on my thinking changed everything. I told Ken I want him to continue correcting me and I will no longer fight him on it. He is a wise man and wants the best for me. He isn't doing it to hurt me but to help me. All of a sudden, I am fine with it!
I truly want to submit to and obey Ken in everything because this is what God commands of me. I am still learning. Understanding what submission looks like can take time when you haven't seen it practiced anywhere, but I know it is a beautiful thing because God only creates beauty.
Wives, submit yourselves to your
own husbands as you do to the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the
wife as Christ is the head of the church,
his body, of which he is the Savior.
Now as the church submits to Christ,
so also wives should submit
to their husbands in everything.
Sharon O · 635 weeks ago
I understand what you are saying. My husband does not criticise me and I do not do that to him, but I do 'gasp' when he is driving, double check when he says he did something and I want to be sure, handle the bills and finances because in the past he made a mistake, in saying all that I am subtle in the critcism. Do you understand what I am saying? without a word I am still saying... I am not sure and don't start me on the 'submit' word. Can't go there. It is a process 'YES'.
Lori Alexander 122p · 635 weeks ago
Cynthia Swenson · 635 weeks ago
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Rosann · 635 weeks ago
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tbg · 635 weeks ago
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Sami · 635 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 635 weeks ago
Sami · 635 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 635 weeks ago
Ken · 635 weeks ago
I think there are things a submissive wife can do with a husband like yours, assuming he is a believer. Submission is certainly about respect and obedience, but it does not require a wife to be a doormat. Good communications in any relationship requires a quick and gracious "I'm so sorry, what could I do differently?" Disarm him with a smile and kindness even as he exposes his weakness to blame.
Step two is to find the right time to discuss the incident after he has calmed down. "I was thinking Jeff about what I did wrong, and you know I always want to please you, but you can be hard to please at times. What I really need from you when you correct me or upset with me is to just tell me with a smile what you want from me. I will try to do it, but we can get along so much better if the emotions are taken out of the situation and I do not feel blamed or scolded. Just tell me like you might tell your co-worker. I know your comfort level allows you to nip at me from time to time, and I will overlook it as best I can, but as Christians we both need to learn not to blame and to always say things with kindness."
OK, you get the point.... it is appropriate in the right timing for you to work to change your husband's thinking and behavior. Take different approaches, in a loving and gentle way, but get him to agree that his explosive or difficult manners are not representative of the life of Jesus he has inside of him.
Submission .... yes, but you both are growing together in Christ and "iron sharpens iron." There is no reason why once or twice a month you cannot ask your husband to help you have a better marriage and explain what that looks like. If done playfully and with a smile you can go a long way to gaining results and he will eventually get it.
Sami · 635 weeks ago