Friday, July 1, 2016

Blogger Under Fire for Sexist Post: Men Should Never Do Housework

This title would certainly grab most people, don't you think? Another magazine has picked up my viral post – The US Weekly. The title was Blogger Under Fire for Sexist Post: Men Should Never Do Housework. Of course, I never said it this way but it’s a great way to get people to read their post about me. They like to sensationalize it. This doesn’t bother me. Many have twisted my words to make them out to be more than I ever said but this is okay. I know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose {Romans 8:28}.

 A few feminists, however, understand the logic in my post. Ethel commented on the US Weekly Facebook page; "In a crazy way I kinda agree with her. Think about it, the husband goes out and works all day while the wife is a 'stay-at-home wife." So he works outside the home and she works at home cleaning and cooking, etc. So now you want him to work outside and inside the home? When does he get a break? I'm not saying that he shouldn't help, but if she's a stay-at-home mom, I would expect her to do the home chores. Now, if they both work outside the home, I would expect both to help with the home-chores. It's that simple people!!"

Emily wrote on the same page; "My husband works. I stay home with the kids and I clean. There are some days where he helps out but mostly I take care of the house. That's my job. (Even though I don't get paid)." Rose responded, "I think if the woman doesn't work then yes, there's no reason why she can't do the majority of the housework, but if both work then they should both do it!"

The last comment is common among women. If they have to work outside of the home, then their husbands should help with the housework. The only problem with this sentiment is that the women are deciding what the husband should do and this isn’t their place to do it. In practicality, yes, a husband should help around the home if he is insisting his wife work outside of the home, but it’s still not up to us to tell him to do this since he is the head over his wife. If you know that your children need you at home full-time but your husband wants you in the workforce, 1 Peter 3:1-6 is God's prescription for you, not demanding your way. However, most women are working outside of their home today since they are the ones who have chosen to do this, therefore, they expect their husbands to help them with housework since working full-time and keeping up the housework is too much for them.

When a woman decides she wants a career and be away from the home, then expects her husband to help with the housework, it’s a recipe for disaster. Nowadays, some men are willing to step in with housework but many are not. Most men have no desire to “keep the home” like the women do. They would rather "build the home." This creates a power struggle that often will lead to divorce. Many times it’s the little things that cause divorce, not the big things. 

When I was upset with Ken about not doing his “fair share,” our marriage was in the tank. A wife can’t live her life being upset with her husband and wanting to control him. It doesn’t work. I love what Kimberly wrote on my Always Learning Facebook page; "My husband has a job. He works eight to ten hours a day, and he supports not only his four kids, but my two, and me. He works hard all day long. As of this moment, I don't work outside of the house, so my job is to help keep the house clean, teach and raise children, and do the jobs my husband can't do because he isn't home. He would love to be home, but how would we survive? So I help him do what he can't do. At least one parent/spouse has to work, so the one at home must take up the other half of the work!"

Even the woman who cleaned my teeth the other day at my dentist office who works two days a week exclaimed, “I don’t want my husband to help with the housework! He works so hard every day, fixes things around the home, and needs some down time. Besides, I do a much better job keeping the home clean and tidy” and she’s not even a Christian!

Finally, I want to end this post by quoting Nikki, in the chat room, after I asked why they thought this post went viral. “The world is inherently selfish, everyone wants to know what someone can do for them, not vice versa. Telling women to not have expectations and to do whatever they can to make their husbands lives easier is teaching sacrificial love, which is God's way and leads to true happiness, but it's sadly very much against human nature. The Christian women who are offended by this clearly need to dust off and read their Bibles!”

For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
Hebrews 4:12