Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Unloved and Insecure Husbands

Unloved, insecure husbands and wives are becoming rampant these days due to mothers working outside of the home. When they were babies, the one person who was supposed to love and care for them the most wasn't around often. Therefore, they spent the majority of their days with others, many times it was with strangers. Unfortunately, these babies usually grew up not knowing how to love or bond with others. 

How does a wife deal with a husband who was not loved or cared for in the way that he should have been? How does she help with his insecurities, mental instabilities, and inability to love as he should? She loves him deeply; this is how. When she took the vow to marry him, she vowed for better or worse, through sickness and health until death do they part. If all women who were married to men like this and wanted a divorce, there would be a lot of divorces. Oh wait, there are a lot of divorces. 

When women ask me these kinds of questions, I always go back to God's prescription for them, 1 Peter 3:1-6. They continue to be in subjection to their husbands and win them by their godly behavior, not their words. Most underestimate the power of a transformed life to change others. When a husband sees a joyful, loving, and caring wife in spite of his behavior, he will most undoubtedly be drawn to her and want what she has. If he believes on the Lord Jesus Christ, he will be filled with the Spirit and be transformed by the power of His name.

There is no other way that I know of that works better than this. How could puny me or anyone else think up something better than our great God? We can't! Human ways will never compare to God's ways. Will it be difficult and will there be trying times? Of course there will be and her husband may never repent but she can stand firm in the knowledge that she has done everything she can to win her husband to the Lord and was obedient to the Lord in the process.

You see, one day we will all have to stand before the Lord to give an account for our deeds while on this earth whether good or bad. A wife who stays with an unloved husband is storing great treasures in heaven. He is seeing Jesus in her and will have no excuse for not accepting Him as his Savior. She can remain joyful knowing whom she serves and what awaits her for eternal life. Yes, life may be tough for her down here but the Lord will give her His strength and peace along the journey.

If you are blessed with children, stay home with them full-time so they will be loved for, cared, and bonded with their mother. This will make it much easier for your children to love, care, and bond with their future spouse. What a gift this is to your children, women! Nothing can surpass this in your children's lives and their future spouses may one day thank you.

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1 Peter 3:1, 2