Boy, did I get it from some of you for flicking my babies' cheeks when they were nursing and bit me. I only had to do it once to each of them and they stopped. I did it hard enough that they cried. I didn't want my breast bitten into. I meant business. I wasn't going to fool around with them in this area. They were not going to get away with it.
Many of you commented on my last post how horrible I was for doing that. I have a question for all of you: Did you vaccinate your babies at two months old? The nurse or doctor sticks needles into them and causes them pain. They scream and cry. They hate it. You allow them to hurt your baby, because you feel it is what is best for your baby.
Most babies right after they are born are pricked in the heel with a needle. My babies screamed when they did that. It caused pain. The doctors did it to check their blood to see if they were healthy. Is that horrible???
Pain isn't always a bad thing as many of you think it is. One flick on the cheek and my babies never bit me again. They learned VERY quickly that they couldn't get away with that. Several swats on their hand when they were crawling and putting their fingers into a light socket taught them not to do that anymore. It was a quick and easy learning tool for us.
As they got a bit older, a few swats on their bottom taught them that when we told them to do something, they did it. They learned to be obedient pretty much before they were two years old. We had to say things once and they obeyed. It was wonderful!
So pain from a needle, a flick on the cheek, or a swat on the hand or bottom...I don't see any difference. They all cause pain but they are all used for the child's good. If you don't want to discipline your babies and children that way, it is fine with me. Use whatever methods you want, but just make sure you teach them to obey you.
But to act like I abused my children is just plain ridiculous. The proof is in the pudding. My children never went through the terrible twos or were rebellious teenagers. Consistent discipline with unconditional love is a wonderful formula from Scripture on how to raise good children.
Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives.
Proverbs 19:18
Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul.
Proverbs 29:17
P.S. Someone commented how unhappy my boys looked in the last picture. Here is a recent picture of them. They are very happy and well adjusted despite enduring pain!
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Logging you in...
Jasmine · 686 weeks ago
Sara B · 686 weeks ago
Jasmine · 686 weeks ago
Nicole · 686 weeks ago
Nicole
Anne · 686 weeks ago
You have strong views and there are many I don't share, but I admire your guts and your grace. Bravo!
Tiffany · 686 weeks ago
Caroline · 686 weeks ago
Barb · 686 weeks ago
Jenny · 686 weeks ago
Jenny · 686 weeks ago
I'd love to hear the perfect parenting methods some of these commenters must use... they sure do feel righteous enough to harshly judge.
missionarymomma · 686 weeks ago
No one said you abused your children.
I an some others are only saying that we disagree that a baby should be flicked or hurt at the breast. My point was that there are many other ways like removing a baby or even better drawing him close so that he is properly latched to prevent biting. Personally, my eight babies all who were nursed for 2 years or longer (my youngest now is 18 mo. and is still nursing) never bit me hard enough to actually hurt because I watched their clues and had them latched on.
"I didn't want my breast bitten into." is an extreme overstatement and not a good picture of a healthy nursing relationship. Why in the world were your babies trying to "bite into you"?
I agree that a PKU and vaccines cause harm to babies.
summergirl4god · 686 weeks ago
Chris · 686 weeks ago
Brit · 686 weeks ago
I went to a breasfeeding support group for a few months after having my son. It was a place for moms to come and weigh their children before and after feedings so they know how much they actually get and to ask questions.
The lactation consultant had 4 children and she said that she would scream loudly and unlatch her babies when they bit and they never did it again. Just an alternative or people who think it's so aweful to flick their cheek. She said it startled them enough to not do it again.
You are right about the vaccinne comparrison! We do not vaccintate our children, but with vaccintating for disciplining most parents are doing what they feel is the best for their children NOT abusing them in at all!
· 686 weeks ago
Cassy · 686 weeks ago
One person pointed out that it didn't mean anything that Lori's kids never went through the terrible twos or a rebellious adolescence. It's great that they were perfect and happy during toddlerhood and teenagerdom, but it isn't proof of anything. Abused kids also skip these stages.
Other than that, there was no mention of abuse. In fact, Lori was the only one to bring it up. She has a hard time when people disagree with her, and assumes she is being called an abuser because we don't want to do it her way.
linda · 686 weeks ago
My mom was not a christian woman when I was little. The first time I ever raised my voice to her she hit me so hard with her hand that my lip bled. That was hitting your kid but you know what, I have never ever raised my voice or even think of speaking ill to her. She became a christian and church taught discipline the incorrect way many are suggesting (positive reinforcement (ill get to why this is incorrect later)). My mom never hit my brother when he raised his voice to her or even disciplined him (the correct way (no, hurting me wasnt the correct way either, though now in my adulthood I am grateful I learned)). My brother is an adult man who conceives raising his voice to his mother, what do you think he'll do with his wife?
A baby does not rationalize? A baby does not form memories or is capable of learning? Seriously? I can teach my two month old dog sit, down, beg, and do her business outside. My 2 month old DOG!! And you are telling me a baby won't or can't learn? Now I read a comment of a woman saying the dog is trained with positive reinforcement. I'd like to ask her how she taught that dog not to bite her children with positive reinforcement after the puppy sinks her teeths on your skin the first time. My dog receives such a chastisement, she never ever bits again. Animal cruelty? well. animal cruelty will be to let her learn that biting is fine and then have her be put down cause she bit the neighbor.
Back to the right way. I always remember something the pastor's wife shared about raising children: "Raising children has to be similar to our relationship with God. At first, we learn to obey God because we fear Him. We know that if He says don't do this and you do, there will be consequences. But as you grow and your relationship grows, you no longer obey God because you fear Him, you obey Him because you love Him and are eternally grateful for what He has done in your life. Your children as well, should fear your word that when you say if you do this you'll receive that, you must be faithful to your word. But your kids will learn to obey not because they fear you, but because they have learned what you teach is good for them and because they love you."
I was a highschool teacher. I taught from 7th grade to 11th grade. I was the youngest of my peers and most were terrified of working with hormonal raging teenagers. I loved every minute. The first partial, my students hated me. I was their most strict teacher and if I said something had to be done a certain way, they better obey or they knew the consequences were real too. As the kids improved their attitudes and grades in my classes, they began enjoying the fruits of their work: less detention, better grades and happier parents, even awards from the school and their parents. As they learned, I turned my discipline methods to the positive reinforcement kind. AFTER! My students ended the year loving her teacher and they are now college students who still seek me for advice.
I was homeroom teacher to 8th grade, deemed the "worst class of the school." The classroom was next to the principle's office. From day 1, I taught my kids God had plans for them: plans to make them men and women of honor. Plans of using them to humiliate the great and proud and show His glory through them. I taught them this throughout the whole year. By the end of the year, 8th grade was the second class with most people on honor roll and good behaviour awards.
I bet Lori's children are this way: kids now adults how have learned the good way and are giving God's glory with their lives. I'd like to hear how the criticizing women's children ended up growing up with the "no-pain" "no-discipline" "only-positive-reinforcement" lies. I am a teacher, I know how your kids raised this way turn up. Maybe you'd like to aks their teachers their opinion?
JRB · 686 weeks ago
I bet money you did not. You found other ways to discipline. Lori could have as well. Physicality is the easy way out.
Also, if you hit your child when he/she does something wrong, won't that teach him/her to hit a younger sibling, or a friend, when that child does something "wrong"?
Jackie · 686 weeks ago
This issue is--is it right to hurt a baby nestled in its mothers arms?
· 686 weeks ago
not disciplining a child could and usually does lead to far worse consequences. sin.
do you remember being an infant? no. if your mother flicked you you would not remember it now, but you would have learned. physical pain does not last, the pain of sin does.
Sheila · 686 weeks ago
Renee · 686 weeks ago
Stefanie · 686 weeks ago
Stefanie
MN
Ronda · 686 weeks ago
summergirl4god · 686 weeks ago