Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Allowing Children Pain


Since I didn't give my children drugs when they had a fever, I was a bad mother.  Since I gave my children a few whacks on the bottom when they disobeyed me, I was a bad mother.  I get it.  Some people think that children should never experience pain.  The Bible teaches differently ~

If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chastens not?  But if you be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are you bastards, and not sons. 

Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence : shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. 

Now no chastening for the present seems to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby . 
Hebrews 12:7-11

I allowed my children to suffer at times, because I loved them.  Yes, if they broke their arm and were in extreme pain, I would give them Tylenol.  If they had a fever, however,  I would try to make them as comfortable as possible without trying to bring their fever down, because I knew that the fever is a good thing that kills the sickness in their bodies. {If the fever had ever become dangerously high, I would have given them Tylenol and taken them to the doctor.  I am not stupid.}

I often wonder if drugs are such a problem in today's society, because parents gave their children drugs for every little thing when they were growing up.  When they grew up they reasoned, "I am in pain.  This is a bad thing. I must take away the pain so I must take drugs."

I smacked them on the bottom a few times when they disobeyed me so they would obey me.  It worked!  When a baby bit me when nursing, I flicked their cheek once.  They never bit me again.  It worked!  Pain is a great teacher.

Many people believe pain and suffering are bad things.  They are not.  They are teachers that can teach us good things, like obeying authority and allowing our bodies to heal themselves naturally without the side effects of drugs.

God uses pain in our lives to teach us many things  ~ to trust in Him, to be more compassionate, to obey Him, to lean on Him and realize that this isn't our home.  It helps us to lessen our grip on things of this world.

In conclusion, I was not a bad mother.  I chose to mother the way that I did because my common sense and the wisdom I sought from the Lord told me to mother that way.  Sure, I made mistakes.  We all do, but I wanted my children to grow up as disciplined adults who could handle pain and know that it is part of life.

P.S.  Yes, that is a picture of my children when they were small!  So if you have small children, enjoy them.  They grow up quickly.