Always Learning: Naked With A Smile

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Naked With A Smile

This is all most husbands want...a naked wife who smiles a lot. They want a joyful wife that enjoys life with him. One who doesn't feel it's her "duty" to keep him fulfilled sexually, but enjoys pleasing him in this way.

Gabrielle Reece is being lambasted for saying things similar to this and that she chooses to serve her husband. She even uses the word "submission." Ken and I were discussing this recently. It's okay for a mother to serve her children out of motherly love. It's okay for a woman to serve her boss for the sake of getting a paycheck. But serving her husband out of love for him...NO WAY!

Most men aren't that complicated. They don't care if their wives look like models. They want a woman who will love them as they are, not argue with them, allow them to be the leader, fix them good food, be happy, and give them lots of sex.

I have known women who dress in the closet. They don't want their husbands to see them naked. They want the lights out and the covers over them. What does their husband want? Have they ever asked him? I doubt it because most men wouldn't put an order in for a wife like that.

Find out what pleases your husband. What will make you most beautiful to your husband is a happy, joyful spirit and being naked for him a lot!

She that is married cares for things of this world,
how she may please her husband.
I Corinthians 7:34

Comments (18)

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Susan · 614 weeks ago

You are so right! I had 3 colon surgeries in 16 months (including a colostomy) plus a c-section scar. I have gained weight over the years and am self conscious. To my husband of 28 years I am still the size 6, 25 year old he fell in love with. It took me a long time to realize this because society tells us we should be lovely on the outside. When I began working on being lovely on the inside amazing things happened!

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Danielle Butler · 614 weeks ago

Society has such a warped view of submission. Many people act like it's slavery & abuse. Check out some of the comments on this post I wrote awhile back...sad. http://www.butlerpartyof2.com/2012/07/being-godly...

1 reply · active 614 weeks ago

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Grace · 614 weeks ago

Danielle, a good friend of mine recently posted your blog post on Facebook. I was so thrilled to read it!! It is so sweet and so heartfelt, yet completely in line with God's teachings. I have gone back to your blog several times to read it again, just to keep it fresh in my mind. Thank you for this message; it has really had an impact!

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Lindsay Harold · 614 weeks ago

You can't have a happy marriage where one or both people are primarily interested in what they want and in making themselves happy. The beautiful thing about a good marriage is that both people focus first on serving each other. And when both people do that, both of them get what they want.

For example, it is said that women need to feel loved to make love while men need to make love to feel loved. And there's a lot of truth to that. But until you give what the other person needs, they can't give you what you need. Selflessness has to come first, before satisfation can be had by either. So, for women, sometimes we have to give our husbands sex for them to have the emotional energy for them to be able to love us as they should. We can't expect them to give love over and over without receiving the sex they need anymore than they can expect us to give sex over and over without receiving the love we need. It needs to go both ways. Focus on giving and you won't worry about who is getting more. You are a team and when you give, you are both are winning.

1 reply · active 613 weeks ago

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Rhiannon · 613 weeks ago

Love this! You are SO right! I think THE problem that people have in their marriage is self interest and trying to get something from the other to make themselves feel good. It's absolutely true that if we could focus on serving the other, giving to them in the ways that make them feel good, then we would win no matter what!

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Janie · 614 weeks ago

Sigh. I do dress in the closet and keep the covers over me. This is something I want to work on, but I am SO self conscious! I've gained a good bit of weight, and am pregnant now.

1 reply · active 614 weeks ago

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Lindsay Harold · 614 weeks ago

My husband thinks I look great, even big pregnant like I am. Even naked and big pregnant. I don't understand it. I really don't. But I do believe him. So I take him at his word, forget about how I think I look, and we both have way more fun that way.

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Lori · 614 weeks ago

I've heard it said that what men find most appealing about their wives' bodies is that they are THEIRS. If we think about it, our bodies are the only ones our husbands are free to touch, enjoy, and yes, even oogle, without it being sinful. That in itself makes us very desireable. I suspect if we keep this in mind, we might be less self-conscious about "coming out of the closet." Thanks for an honest, challenging post.

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misti · 614 weeks ago

Love this post! I wish more ladies would stop looking at sex as a chore. connecting with my husband and vacuuming are WAY different!
When my husband built our walk in closet, he added a lock on the inside. when i asked him why he said that on days that we get ready together its hard for him to resist me. that makes me feel really good after all these years and kids :)
-blessings

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Courtney · 614 weeks ago

That last sentence makes me laugh :) Can't argue with that!! I'm curious- what is your opinion on "keeping the mystery" in marriage. A lot of people write about how that's important. Things like not using the toilet or clipping your toenails in front of each other, maybe not even flossing or applying make up in front of your husband, or only letting him see you in your attractive underthings. What do you think? And if you do think keeping the mystery alive is important, what does that mean in a Christian marriage?

1 reply · active 614 weeks ago

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Lori Alexander 122p · 614 weeks ago

Great question, Courtney. I may write a post on it. The only problem are the words I would have to use! We never poop or toot in front of each other. I put my makeup on in front of him and brush my teeth. I think it is good to be as feminine and proper around your husband as you can...except in the bed!

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Tyson Cooper · 614 weeks ago

Interesting thoughts and great comments. I especially appreciate the sentiments shared by several about how their husbands find them attractive despite how they feel about themselves. I encounter that with my wife from time to time where she doesn't feel particularly attractive one day. It doesn't matter to me whether she feels attractive or not, she is the most beautiful (and sexy) woman in the world.

Also, I'm happy to be your newest follower! I'd love it if you could take a second to check out my blog and follow me back :)

Thanks so much,
Tyson@Uplifting Love

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Helene · 614 weeks ago

If I've ever been beautiful, even for a moment, its is in my husband eyes! Thanks for encouraging us in pleasing our men the way THEY want to be pleased.

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Fawn @HappyWivesClub · 613 weeks ago

Thanks for writing that note about Gabrielle Reese because now I'll go look that up and see what she said. Interesting! I've watched her over the years (I live in So. Cal and love pro-beach volleyball) so I'm curious to see what she says because so many of her friends on the pro-beach vb circuit (who I know well) actually have this same perspective. Thanks!!

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Christina · 613 weeks ago

Just found your blog!
Now following!
Looking forward to keeping up and getting to know you.

I also have a blog design site, if you ever need a blog makeover check it out :)
christinaloranedesigns.blogspot.com

xo
Christina
pieceitalltogetherx3.blogspot.com

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annambowman 0p · 613 weeks ago

So true! It makes me sad that insecurity and self-consciousness cause so many women to deprive their husbands of the very thing they want - their wife. I had to learn this lesson the hard way. I thank God for delivering me from this destructive mindset!

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LatterDay Marriage · 613 weeks ago

Everybody submits to somebody, even Christ submitted to the will of the Father.

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Deb · 612 weeks ago

Lori - for some reason I missed this post but just found it. I read the first paragraph to my hubby who got a bit smile and said, "That is exactly right!" Great post and so very true. Thanks for this timely post! (I think the title of this post may become my new marriage motto)!

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