Friday, May 6, 2016

1950's Housewife


The following list was in 1950s public high school home economics textbooks. No wonder marriages were happier back then and there were fewer divorces! I'm sure this list was removed from the textbooks during the 60s sexual revolution when feminism began in full force and women no longer wanted to serve their husbands nor be at home full time. The sad thing is that women have suffered from feminism just as much as children and husbands. This list is biblical; for it teaches wives how to love their husbands and be their help meets as God intended. 

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home, and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair, and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little happy and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift. 

Clear away clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up schoolbooks, toys, and papers. Then, run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.

Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and face (if they are small). Comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures, and he would like to see them playing the part.

Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile. 

Don't greet with problems or complaints.

Don't complain if he is late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow, and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home, and relax.

"Do you see what has happened in the last fifty years? Every high school girl was taught a conservative worldview that was more Biblical in perspective than what the churches teach today" (Debi Pearl). No wonder there were fewer divorces back then! Men were made to feel respected and appreciated for their hard work of providing for their families. Few if any churches teach this to women anymore and instead they would probably mock it as ridiculous. It's not ridiculous. It's doing what wives can do in order to be the best help meets to their husbands that they can be. Few know how to do this anymore.

She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. 
Proverbs 31:27

*List from Created to Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl

Comments (42)

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I've read this before and I just love it. Some women would certainly mock it, but I'm sure doing all these things and creating this type of atmosphere would be relaxing to the women too. Having the appliances running, clutter everywhere, and a list of complaints to share with her bound would be a burden for the woman as well. I'm always so happy when I hear the special text message sound for my husband that lets me know he is on his way home! We have so little time every day to spend together in this life. I want to do everything I can to make those hours together pleasant. I even own a few dresses from the 1950s that help pull the whole picture together! I pray that many women will be encouraged today by this advice.
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
I do work full time outside the home but I always make an effort to get dinner on the go so that it's ready, or close to it by the time my husband comes home. I know it means a lot to him to have yummy dinner smells meet him at the door, and he has commented how much he appreciates my efforts, knowing I've had a long day at work. I love putting his wants and needs first because I know he does likewise for me in different areas of our marriage.
2 replies · active 464 weeks ago
Lori,
I love this, especially the ribbon! Seriously, that part that talks about a place of work being full of weary people is so true. We need to make home a place where he wants to come. A place that's more attractive than work. A place of refuge for him. His kingdom. There are so many women at work these days that we have to make what is at home more relatable, not less. A more enticing place for him to come home to.
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
Lady Virtue's avatar

Lady Virtue · 464 weeks ago

I will definitely be saving this for future reference, as I'm always interested in learning how to be a better help meet for my husband and to obey the Lord in this Biblical calling. It's sad that so many women today don't do this or don't want to do it. Many women are in the labor force and are tired when they get home, expect the husband to prepare dinner, tend to the children, etc. In short, they want their husbands to handle their keeper at home duties.

Thanks for posting this list, Lori!
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
This is such an awesome list! I strive to teach my girls these kinds of things in preparing for their future. It clearly spells out a servant's heart by putting the needs of others before our own and expecting nothing in return. There is so much joy in this kind of living and is the heart of our Lord.
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
Did another post on the Proverbs 31 series, Lori, if you or any of your readers are interested.'

This one covers the responsibility we have to make sure we're pursuing spiritual growth and maturity. I've had a lot of backlash against this series already, even women saying that there is no such thing as a virtuous woman - basically that it isn't possible. Since the verse in Proverbs that the post is unfolding alludes the virtuous woman to a merchant ship, there are a lot of cool facts about what the ancient merchant ships of the Bible were really like, their purpose, their special features that allowed them to weather storms.

I tie it in to Paul's call to us to grow up in our faith - to not be like children tossed on the waves and every wind of deception in our culture (Ephesians 4), and his warnings on avoiding the shipwrecking of our faith by becoming carnal Christians. It also touches on the heart of the virtuous woman - that she is willing to go the distance to make sure her family has the best of the best. https://girlwithadragonflytattoo.com/2016/05/06/s...
2 replies · active 464 weeks ago
I love this! I really want to do these things for my husband who works so hard for our family. My struggle is on nights where the kids have a game or a practice. We only have the 4 kids in one activity at a time and try to pick the sport with practice once a week, but it still adds up fast. Since they are homeschooled and two are in junior high these activities help the kids make friends and really feel their are a lot of benefits, but sometimes I wonder if it is worth the rush to eat dinner and head out the door. Lori, I would appreciate any feedback or guidance.
4 replies · active 464 weeks ago
Love this! Can you tell me where you found the book?
4 replies · active 464 weeks ago
I love this list! I've seen versions of it floating around the internet from time to time but the versions I'd seen in the past always had some really offensive things in them. It makes me wonder just how genuine the other versions I've come across are, or if the truly offensive parts may be fabricated. Either way this list is wonderful, I may just print it out and stick it on my fridge as an encouragement.
5 replies · active 463 weeks ago
I've seen this list before and I love it! Our men are out there working hard for us all day. I think the least we can do is try our best to make them feel welcome and relaxed when they come home. And I agree with the writer about how keeping things neat gives you a lift too. It does for me! Having things ready and clean makes me happy and relaxed as well. I really don't like scrambling at the last minute trying to find something to make for dinner. Being organized and having children help as they're able to makes things easier. It's very fulfilling knowIng you're taking care of your husband and family. Thank you for sharing this today.
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
A great post as always! Having worked all through my single days, I remembered what it was like to come home at the end of a stressful day. That experience helped me to know that it would never be a good idea to greet my husband with a list of problems whenever he came home from work. I always try to have the evening meal ready and the house relaxed and neat. When our girls were little they took to following me around and doing whatever I did...it was really cute and sweet but at the same time it was teaching them. They would even go and put on a nice clean dress for Daddy! They are teens now but they will still shut off the TV or put things down that they are working on, ready to greet him with me when he comes home. I hope these are habits for a lifetime!
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
I went to buy my families supply of fruit and veg early this morning and the woman working there ( for she was certainly NOT a lady) was whining endlessly at the poor male worker. Ugh! Women seemed to be smarter and easier to put up with back then. I don't know how the poor guy puts up with it at home and work. Hopefully he is married to a more sensible wife.
1 reply · active 464 weeks ago
Taylor, as someone who was once in the retail trenches, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

And I don't need this book. Why? Because I was born with a deep well of empathy, which I have honed since I was a small child and I try to give to men, women and children, both personally and professionally. One of my favorite college professors said to me, "If there is one thing I will remember about you, Jennifer, it is this. You are one of the kindest people I have ever met."

Empathy isn't just feeling for someone; it is feeling with someone.
I love love this post! Thank you Lori for helping to open our eyes to the truth! I have send this post to my friends.
I was never a great cook and after i was injured in an accident it's worse- I have the short term memory of Dory in Finding Nemo some days : ) I am not married and don't live with my boyfriend, but I do try and cook some things and bring them to work for him (he is a firefighter!) He cooks for me on his days off and we eat dinner together.. I like our dual schedule for food. It takes the pressure off me to cook every night (it makes me anxious just thinking about it) and lets him cook because he loves to cook and is a MUCH better chef than I am. I look at the list above and some of it seems silly, but I'm sure it helped a lot of families. I am a better cleaner than I am a cook. I think it's because of all the times I have spent cleaning the stove after food boils over or scrubbing a pan clean. HAHA
Sarah Russell's avatar

Sarah Russell · 462 weeks ago

I remember reading this list back in high school. My friends were sharing in on Facebook, looking fun at it, but I found myself secretly longing to be that wife! I noticed that my mom did a lot of those things and we talked about it. It was the beginning of my journey to becoming a homemaker. I have a ways to go, but I'm checkpoint off more and more things on this list!
Loved this! Thank you so much!!!
Trish Crandall's avatar

Trish Crandall · 460 weeks ago

I want to thank u for this eye opening article. I had a massive stroke at a young age 17 years ago. At first I took great pride in learning new ways to do things at home, since I lost the use of mt right arm and was left with a very pronounced limp. But a few years ago, I just gave up keeping a nice house and taking care of my mate the way I should, and can do. I became lazy. This article showed me that I'm using my didabilities as an excuse. Dave is a very good and loving, who deserves to be treated as such. Thank u for waking me up.

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