Parental Absenteeism and the Empty House

Having a lot of children used to be normal. Now families with a lot of children are made to feel badly about it. Marriages staying committed "until death do they part" used to be normal but is not normal now. There are so few mothers at home anymore taking care of their children. What was once normal is now not normal at all! "Kids do not profit from parental absenteeism and the empty house can be a dangerous place...many find empty houses a convenient place to engage in self-destructive behavior." *

Studies have proven that children with absent mothers suffer more from depression, suicidal thoughts, sexual promiscuity, and these usually affect them greatly throughout their entire lives. The feeling of abandonment so many children have today causes them to participate in self-destructive habits since their feelings of being unloved are so strong. Children need their mothers home full-time. They need their mothers loving them deeply enough to be with them, discipline, and train them. They were never meant to be away from their mothers; their greatest source of security in this insecure world. "Moreover, as these insecure children grow up, the ramifications for society are disturbing. One psychologist has said that never before in American history have so many children been raised by strangers."* It has been a devastating experiment that has destroyed many children's lives.

If mothers have to work outside of the home, the children don't understand this since they need their mothers. All they know is that they have been abandoned by the one person who is supposed to love and protect them. Mothers should do everything they can to come home full-time and be there for their children. If your husband insists you work, buy the book Home By Choice and have all the statistics available to explain to your husband how detrimental it is for his children to be without you home full-time. Ask the Lord for wisdom in how to present it to your husband in a respectful way. Pray that He will convict and change your husband's mind. Live within your husband's income. This means to live carefully, frugally, and be content.

In order for your husband to listen to you, you should be a warm, loving, joyful, and affectionate wife towards him. Do everything in your power to be the wife God calls you to be. You don't want your appeal to fall on deaf ears. However, if he understands the importance to his children of having you home and the detrimental effect of you being gone, he most likely will do everything he can to have you home full-time.

Concerning single mothers: "While it is not my intention to heap guilt on single mothers who find they must work, they need to be aware of how their children are affected. You see, young children don't understand that the mother doesn't have a choice. I would challenge the single mother, if at all possible, to use her wits and ingenuity to turn her skills into profit at home."* 

"Feminists have largely controlled the public image of women. Mothers at home, who are impediments to the feminist agenda, have been largely ignored. In their thrust for subsidized child care, equal rights, and abortion rights, feminists have done violence to mothering with their constant proclamation that mothering is a 'low status job.'"*

Mothering is NOT a low status job. It is a job given to women by their Creator. Do you see how easily the enemy of our souls tries to deceive people into believing the opposite of what God has commanded? Stop listening to him and begin listening to the Lover of your soul. When you come home, you need to love your children deeply, speak words of life and Truth into their lives consistently, and teach them to work hard, be honest, love God, and be kind. Raising up godly children takes a lot of time and effort but it is well worth it. It is the most important ministry you have in your life.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, 
neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.
Isaiah 55:8

{*All quotes are from Home By Choice}