Does Love Win?

Did love win now that men can marry men and women can marry women? Does love give us the green light to do what we want even if it is opposed to God's original purpose and design? I noticed most of the Christian women's blogs didn't write anything about the gay marriage decision. Does love mean we don't write or say anything that offends others in hopes that it will bring them to believe in Jesus? Is love only about the idea that all we need to do is love people to Jesus? Yes, love covers over a multitude of sins and we are called to be people of love, but what exactly does love mean?

Most people think of love as simply accepting people the way they are, doing things for them and being kind. Is this all? Rob Bell wrote a book called "Love Wins." Many blogs only teach about love and grace, as well as many preachers and teachers. They don't want to offend anybody, be liked by everybody and not make others uncomfortable. Is this love? Does this win others to Christ?

If you want to know what love is look at Jesus, since He is the definition of love. Did everyone who knew Him as He walked this earth believe in Him? No! Many rejected the personification of love even though they saw the way that He lived and many even listened to Him and touched Him. When He rules this earth for 1,000 years, many will reject Him. This proves that love isn't what wins, since Jesus is love.

What is love exactly anyways? How does Jesus define it since He is love? Yes, He loved people deeply but He didn't want them to stay the way there were. When people were caught in sin, He would tell them to go and sin no more. He rebuked the religious people for their many sins against others and their pride. He angrily cleaned out the temple since they were using the temple for ungodly means. He served people by even washing their feet. He never had boundaries with people. Yes, He went to the mountain to pray but He didn't ever prevent people from interrupting Him. He exhorted people to obey His commands and told them that if they truly loved Him, they would obey Him. He hated sin so much that He allowed Himself, the Creator of the universe, to be crucified on a cross so we could be freed from sin. This is what true love looks like. It isn't just grace and mercy. It speaks the Truth in love also, even though many people won't like us since we expose their wicked deeds. If just "love" could win others, Jesus would have won all.

We are called to live lives as Jesus did. We are to encourage people to go and sin no more. We are called to exhort and rebuke those who are in sin. We can have righteous anger at sin and the destruction it causes. Love serves others, even doing menial jobs like cleaning the toilets for our families. It welcomes others to interrupt us if they need our help. Love encourages others to obey all of God's commands, even the difficult ones. We are much more concerned about pleasing our Father than people, so we do the work the Father has assigned for us to do even if it is completely contrary to what the world is doing. Finally, we are willing to deny ourselves, even to the point of death, to proclaim the Good News of the Gospel; all of it, including being filled with His Holy Spirit to accomplish His will once people call upon His name and are saved.

This, my friends, is love. And no, love does not win, neither does mercy or grace. Only those who believe in Jesus and His shed blood for their sin wins. Believe on the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved {Acts 16:31}. It's not an easy road we are asked to walk. Just writing, teaching, and preaching about love, mercy and grace is easy. Teaching ALL what true love entails isn't easy, but we are commanded to do it in hopes they will believe since it is the ONLY thing that saves people from their sin and eternal damnation.

Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; 

reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine.

2 Timothy 4:2

Bikinis and Careers Have Destroyed America

Yes, I wrote the title correctly; bikinis and women having careers are what is destroying America according to President John Adams* on June 2, 1778, not homosexuality, gay marriage, sexual immorality, nor pornography.

"From all that I have read of history and government of human life and matters, I have drawn this conclusion, that the manners of women were the most infallible barometer to ascertain the degree of morality and virtue in a nation. All that I have since read and all the observations I have made in different nations have confirmed me in this opinion.

"The manners of women are the surest criterion by which to determine whether a Republican Government is practicable in a nation or not. The Jews, the Greeks, the Romans, the Swiss, the Dutch, all lost their public spirit, their Republican principles and habits and their Republican forms of government when they lost the modesty and domestic virtues of their women."

Women have absolutely lost all forms of modesty, even Christian women. They feel comfortable in bikinis, parading their bodies around for all to see. They have no problem showing off their breasts with low-cut tops and showing off most of their legs with short, short skirts. God commands women to be modest. He clothed Adam and Eve in coats after they covered themselves with fig leaves. 

In Ezekiel 16, God says to Jerusalem, "...your breasts were formed and your hair had grown. Yet you were naked and bare. Then I passed by you and saw you, and behold, you were at the time for love; so I spread my skirt over you and covered your nakedness...I also clothed you with embroidered cloth...I wrapped you with fine linen and covered you with silk....But you trusted in your beauty and played the harlot...And you took off some of your clothes...Because your lewdness was poured out and your nakedness uncovered...I shall gather them against you from every direction and expose your nakedness." 

Nakedness and shame always go together in the Bible. We are to be modest, discreet, and chaste women of God, not looking as the world looks or dressing as they do. We are to be examples of Christ to the world. The world, which is governed by Satan, should never be our example for anything.

Women have abandoned their domestic virtues, as I have written over and over again. They fled their domestic duties to pursue higher educations and careers, learning the feminist agenda along the way which began with Eve when she decided she wanted to do things her way instead of God's. 

Women abandoned their children to daycare and government run schools where their children are bullied and taught things contrary to the Word of God. They have failed to raise their children in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord; speaking to them when they rise up, walk along the way, and sit around the dinner table, since they are too exhausted from submitting to and obeying another man at their jobs who is not their husband.

What does God call us to do? Love and obey our husband, be chaste, and discreet keepers at home. We can't think we can abandon God's Word and find joy-filled lives or a healthy society when we act contrary to His Word. So many repercussions have happened since women have left their homes, I can't even begin to name them, but if you research my "keepers at home" category, you will find most of them. It is tragic, but it is mostly tragic since even Christian women, along with many of their husbands, have fallen for the feminists' lies.

PLEASE, women, dress modestly. Let the words 'discreet' and 'chaste' define ALL of your clothing. Go home and raise your children and be a true help meet to your husband. If you are an older women, teach the young women  to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed {Titus 2:3-5}. Thank you.

In like manner also, 
that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, 
with shamefacedness and sobriety.
1 Timothy 2:9

***Here is an important article for any parents who have children in the public school system. "There are two reasons for this step (taking your children out of government run schools), given this Extreme Court decision. If your children remain in the government schools, there is now no legal way for them to be taught any normal view of human sexuality. And, depend upon it, they will be taught the other kinds. And second, they will be taught an approach to civics that sees nothing wrong with the Supreme Court’s juridical putsch here, and that is just as worrisome."

*Quoted by John Eidsmoe in Christianity and the Constitution, Baker Book House, 1987, p. 272, from Adams, Diary and Autobiography of John Adams, ed. L. H. Butterfield, Belknap/Harvard, 1962, IV:123.

King Solomon Taught His Son to Seek Wisdom

King Solomon gives us a very good example of how we, as parents, are to raise up our children in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord with some verses in Proverbs 3. 

My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments: For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee. Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart: So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil. Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. My son, let not them depart from thine eyes: keep sound wisdom and discretion: So shall they be life unto thy soul, and grace to thy neck.

This, my sisters in Christ, is how we should raise our children. Make SURE they know God's Word! Teach them all about mercy and truth. They are to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul and mind and love others as they love themselves. They must speak Truth in love for true love speaks Truth. They must learn to trust the Lord and allow Him to direct their paths. He gives us everything we need for life and godliness and all that He wants of us is clearly spelled out in His Word. 

We are commanded to teach them to depart from evil. The public schools are filled with evil. Many false teachings are being taught. The students, their peers, are exposing themselves to filth on a daily basis through the Internet, music, television and movies. Foul language spews out of their mouths. History has been distorted to promote an evil, false agenda. The feminist agenda is pervasive. Young woman are NEVER being taught to be have gentle and quiet spirits, to be submissive to their husbands and keepers at home. They are being taught the complete opposite!

Teach your children to seek wisdom. Have them in the Word at an early age. When you teach them, give them books of autobiographies of great missionaries and evangelists who preached the Gospel boldly regardless of the cost to themselves. Listen to great sermons with them as they get older. All of my children love to listen to great, biblically sound preachers. They love being challenged in their walk with the Lord.

Lastly, teach them all about grace. It is God's abundant grace that allows them to live godly lives and preach the Gospel with their words and the way they live their lives. It is grace that allows them to love without limits and forgive freely. It is grace that causes us to not get offended easily, hold grudges, and love the unlovable. It is grace that makes us want to give freely since He has so freely given to us. Bless His Holy Name.

Grieving Over the Supreme Court's Decision

Yesterday, our Supreme Courts made gay marriage the law of the land. Yes, I wept when I read this since I know it is so far removed from God's will for marriage and hurts those involved in gay marriage, along with our society. However, we must not fret for even Jesus spoke these words when He walked this earth, "A wicked and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign; and there shall no sign be given unto it, but the sign of the propeht Jonah." {Matthew 16:4}.

God reminds us 365 times in His Word to not fear; a verse for every day of the year. We are NOT to live in fear but in the joy of the Lord, giving thanks for all that He has done for us. We must be in His Word daily, seeking those things which are above, and NOT things on this earth for this earth is NOT our home. Our home is with Jesus where we will spend eternity with Him; a place with no sin, sorrow or suffering.

Therefore, in the midst of the corruption swirling around us, we must continue to live in obedience to the Lord with the power of the Holy Spirit living within us and God's amazing grace on our lives! "Never dread any consequence resulting from absolute obedience to His command. Never fear the rough waters ahead...God is greater than the roar of raging water and the mighty waves of the sea. 'The Lord sits enthroned over the flood; the Lord is enthroned as King forever" {Psalm 29:10}. Dare to trust Him! Dare to follow Him! Then discover that the forces that blocked your progress and threatened your life become at His command the very materials He uses to build your street of freedom" {F. B. Meyer}.

NEVER give into the society's perverted and evil ways. Do NOT compromise with them in any way. Stand firm in your faith and the hope that we have in Christ. Refuse to become a lukewarm Christian. As the days get darker, we will be able to easily see the separation of the wheat from the tares. God is so much greater than the evil forces that are at work today; SO MUCH GREATER! Finally, be encouraged by these words from Charles Spurgeon ~

BANISH for ever all thought of indulging the flesh if you would live in the power of your risen Lord. It were ill that a man who is alive in Christ should dwell in the corruption of sin. "Why seek ye the living among the dead?" said the angel to Magdalene. Should the living dwell in the sepulchre? Should divine life be immured in the carnal house of fleshly lust? How can we partake of the cup of the Lord and yet drink the cup of Belial? Surely, believer, from open lusts and sins you are delivered: have you also escaped from the more secret and delusive lime-twigs of the Satanic fowler? Have you come forth from the lust of pride? Have you escaped from slothfulness? Have you clean escaped from carnal security? 

Are you seeking day by day to live above worldliness, the pride of life, and the ensnaring vice of avarice? Remember, it is for this that you have been enriched with the treasures of God. If you be indeed the chosen of God, and beloved by Him, do not suffer all the lavish treasure of grace to be wasted upon you. Follow after holiness; it is the Christian's crown and glory. 

An unholy church! it is useless to the world, and of no esteem among men. It is an abomination, hell's laughter, heaven's abhorrence. The worst evils which have ever come upon the world have been brought upon her by an unholy church. O Christian, the vows of God are upon you. You are God's priest: act as such. You are God's king: reign over your lusts. You are God's chosen: do not associate with Belial. Heaven is your portion: live like a heavenly spirit, so shall you prove that you have true faith in Jesus, for there cannot be faith in the heart unless there be holiness in the life.

As my cousin, Crystal, wrote on Facebook yesterday,  "He has already won the battle. Everything is going according to His plan."

Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; 
that put darkness for light, and light for darkness, 
that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter.
Isaiah 5:20

Are Babies Born Sinful?

Some take this verse to mean that babies are born sinful; "Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me" from the NIV transliteration of Psalm 51:5. Yes, from this verse, it seems we are definitely born sinful. However, the KJV is a translation which is a MUCH more accurate version and reads, "Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me." This version does not say that babies are sinful but born into sin.

Yes, babies are born into a sinful and fallen world but what was passed onto us from Adam? Was it his sin that was passed on or death? "Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned" {Romans 5:12}. From this verse, we see that it wasn't sin that was passed down to us but death because all MEN have sinned.

Romans 1 explains the progression of sin in a person's life since God's attributes are clearly seen throughout creation. Who is God's wrath poured upon? Is His wrath poured upon babies? "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness" {Romans 1:18}. God's wrath is poured upon those who HOLD the truth in unrighteousness; those who know God's Truth yet continue to disobey it. Babies don't know God's Truth. I believe a newborn baby has no sin, just as Adam and Eve had no sin before deciding to sin. 

We are held accountable for our own sin. However, what about children and the age of accountability? We are all born with a conscience. We are supposed to have mothers and fathers who train our consciences in God's ways. Our consciences are molded by what we feed them with. The more time we spend in His Word, the more they are sharpened to know good from evil. As we grow up, we continue to make choices to obey it or disobey it. The more we disobey it, the more we will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. If we continue disobeying it, our conscience can no longer tell right from wrong and God gives us over to a "reprobate mind." {Romans 1:28}

Most children who grow up in Christians homes, either decide to continue walking with Jesus or walk away which usually happens around the ages between 18 to 22 years old. Since the brain isn't even fully developed until the early 20s, it makes sense to me that these years begin the age of accountability. Therefore, make sure your children's consciences are shaped by God's Word and NOT the world. As Dennis Prager recently stated on his radio program, "It makes no sense why conservative, Christian parents will spend $40,000 a year to send away their kids to Universities to be indoctrinated with ideas opposed to their ideas and wonder why their children turn out to be left-wing liberals."

Of course, I'm not God, I didn't write the Bible and all of this, whether or not we are "born" sinful and the age of accountability, is only my opinion! Thankfully, God is a righteous and merciful judge and has this all figured out.

But Jesus said, "Let the children alone, 
and do not hinder them from coming to Me; 
for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
Matthew 19:14

Love the Role God Has Given You!

Do you realize that all of God's commands given to young women center around the home? He doesn't command older women to teach young women to be involved in their church, attend Bible studies or even to read the Word daily and pray. His commands are for the good of the family; love your husband and children, be chaste, good, and keepers at home.

Husbands are commanded to work hard and provide for what? The family! Everything revolves around the family for this is where God does His greatest work. We can see the devastation everywhere that has happened as women have left their homes to pursue things outside of the home. 

God's desire is to raise up a family for Him and for His glory. This should also be our primary goal. How do we do this? By being godly, submissive help meets to our husbands and raising our children in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord. This doesn't just take "quality" time, it takes all of your time!

There are only so many hours in a day and those hours should be spent raising a family for the Lord, if you have one. Women are told that they may win disobedient husbands by their godly behavior. Children will rise up and bless a godly mother. It ALL revolves around the home and family!

It takes years to raise godly offspring. It takes time to keep a home neat and tidy. It takes knowledge and time to shop for the healthiest food you can afford and fix it and to spend your money wisely. It takes hours of study and research to find different ways to heal your family naturally and keep their immune systems strong. It takes a conscious effort to love on your husband and help him to enjoy the wife of his youth. None of these things should be taken for granted and all of them should be the focus of your life for these directives are from the Lord.

When others mock you for your decision to stay home full-time and maybe you have even given up a lucrative job, think of these wise words from my husband ~

Remember that when you are walking with the Lord and doing His will, it makes no difference what foolishness others think or say. If you want to win them, do it with joy and laughter. Show them that you love life and love the role God has given you. What they need to see is your joy in the Lord as you serve Him faithfully, not your upset over their desire for worldly ways. We can win very few if we ourselves do not shine Jesus to a dark and dying world. It's not emotional abuse when they disagree strongly with you; they were just sure they knew what was best for you and they are dead wrong. Show them by your attitude and love how wrong they really are and by the fruit of your ministry. 

Do not be grieved,

 for the joy of the LORD is your strength.

Nehemiah 8:10

photo source

Sexuality is Only About Consent?

We've seen Miley Cyrus' transformation from a "good" little Hannah Montana girl to a worldly young woman with no morals or values. A recent comment of hers concerning sexuality shows how far from God's ways she has strayed, "I am literally open to every single thing that is consenting and doesn't involve an animal and everyone is of age. Everything that's legal, I'm down with...As long as you're not hurting anyone, your choices are your choices. I don't relate to being boy or girl, and I don't have to have my partner relate to boy or girl." {I didn't link to where I got this comment from since they all showed an indecent picture of her.}

These thoughts of her seem to be the values of today. As long as there is consent, you're free to have sex with whoever you want and whenever you want. There are no moral constraints for we are to do as we please. She states that as long as you're not hurting anyone, it is okay. Has she not researched the harm that sex outside of marriage results in; STDs, HIV, AIDS, infertility, to name a few? I would say all of these not only hurt the people who are having sex but all those who love these people. Sex outside of marriage is the one sin that God says we reap the consequences in our own bodies. {1 Corinthians 6:18} She is ignorant in her words. Our choices impact ourselves and others.

She is longing to fill her emptiness in godless and immoral ways.  One day, however, Miley will figure out that even though she thinks she is free to live as she wants, she still has that emptiness in her soul. She needs Jesus. All those living in sin and practicing sin aren't free at all. They're in bondage to their sin and there is no escape, except through the blood of Christ. They will keep searching for answers in this world, yet they will never find them.

We all long for something to fill our emptiness; as believers, we long for the garden. We long for the Garden of Eden where we could walk with God, where there is no shame, guilt or sin and we would be joyful all the day long. We will NEVER find our satisfaction in things, actions or others here on earth. It all leads to emptiness without God. We weren't made for this earth. We were made for godliness, purity and holiness in complete union with God until sin entered the world.

Please, don't find your morals and values from society but from God's unchanging Word. Stay sexually pure until marriage and consistently teach your children Truth. Don't deprive your husband of intimacy when you are married. Be careful what you watch, read and fill your minds with. Fill it with God's Word and goodness. Sex inside of God's boundaries is beautiful; outside of them, it becomes ugly and destructive.

Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.

Proverbs 5:15-19

C. S. Lewis' Thoughts on Homemaking

Many in today's society hate Truth, even Christians. I realize that the very most important Truth is Christ's death and resurrection for a true believer. However, God's Word is a blueprint for living, therefore, if we want lives that are pleasing to Him, we must study His Word and live our lives according to it. We must not hate any of his directions to us on how we are to live. They are for our good, not because He wants to make our lives miserable. On the contrary, His prescriptions for living are the best way to live.

Many think that I dislike working mothers since I teach about being keepers at home so much. I don't dislike working mothers. I love them, therefore, I teach them what is best for them and their families. I also teach them to be keepers at home since God commands me to teach them this no matter what gets thrown at me.

Few women alive are equipped with the super strength necessary at the end of a workday to meet the emotional needs of their children, to train and guide and discipline, to build self-esteem, to teach the true values of life, and beyond all that, to maintain a healthy marital relationship as well. {Dr. James Dobson}

It would appear that the woman willing to lose her life temporarily in the lives of her family stands to gain the most. God's economy seems backward to us - lose in order to gain, give in order to get and die that we might live. But it works. {Marilee Horton}

Why do so many hate to hear this Truth? It surely must be because they hate Truth since it is clearly spelled out in Scripture. Many hate it when I teach a wife is to submit to her husband. Again, they must hate Truth since God is clear about this also. Many seem to pick and choose what they like and dislike to fit their lifestyle so they won't offend others. I would rather offend others than disobey God.

Women don't like hearing that what they are doing is not in obedience to God's Word. They feel judged and want others to agree with them in their decisions, even if it goes contrary to Scripture. We live in a "feel good" society. Make everyone feel good and comfortable, instead of confronting them with the Truth.

I don't want women to be comfortable doing things that are opposite of what God commands. I know that they will be so much better off as well as their husbands, children and even society if they come home full-time, if at all possible, and joyfully minister to their family, since as C.S. Lewis' words above so aptly say, "The Homemaker's job is one for which ALL others exist!" What can be more important than this?

Older women teach young women...to be keepers at home.
Titus 2:3-5

The Dark Side of Feminism and Equality

When I have mentioned before that men and women are not equal and never will be no matter how much feminists want this to be true, I get scolded. Yes, I know we are equal in value and worth and in the eyes of the Lord, just as children and parents are equal in worth, yet they aren't equal in authority and many others things. I believe the same is with men and women. Men can never be women and women can never be men no matter how hard they try. God designed us differently in the way that we think, respond, hormones, size, stature, strength, anatomy, etc. for wonderful purposes. 

An article has just been written by a former editor of Cosmopolitan Magazine who thought she "had it all" but was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Large numbers of today's educated, middle-class women are more stressed, more prone to depression and drinking more than ever before. They are leaving it too late to settle down and have children, and ending up alone - and lonely. Lifestyle changes that are concomitant with equality, and which women like me once welcomed, are taking a toll that seems to grow greater.

I love what Elizabeth Elliot had to say about this topic, "A Christian woman's true freedom lies on the other side of a very small gate - humble obedience - but that gate leads out into a largeness of life undreamed of by liberators of the world, to a place where the God-given differentiation between the sexes is not obfuscated but celebrated, where our inequalities are seen as essential to the image of God, for it is in male and female, in male as male and female as female, not as two identical and interchangeable halves, that the image is manifested."

God is very clear about the roles He has given to males and females and what is best for each sex. People will ALWAYS suffer when they depart from their God-given role. Is it any wonder that in any given year, women appear to experience higher overall rates of psychological disorders than men? Women were never meant to be the protectors and providers. We are not physically or emotionally built for these things. We are built for nurturing and taking care of our family and home. Look at the female body compared to the male. Study the difference in the brain and emotions. Take blood and compare the hormones. We're different, so different from each other and God made us different for a reason; for the good of the family and society when our roles are followed as ordained by Him. The problem, I believe, is that you can't over-ride the inbuilt instincts in men to be the protectors and providers, while women - however career-minded they are - are still natural nurturers and nest-builders.

This article wasn't written by a Christian nor from a Christian perspective, yet she claims that while there's much to celebrate in terms of women's achievements, the price paid for equality is rising exponentially. I don't think the price of straying from our God-given roles is worth it in any way. The cost has been way too high and those who have suffered the most are the most innocent, the children. You see, she believes that the things that have come out of the feminist movement have been good, whereas, I believe they are VERY bad. Putting commitment on hold to concentrate on your career, as well as to experience multiple relationships before settling down, has liberated women from the shackles of economic dependence and enriched their lives socially and sexually. And, of course, for some women, Mr. Right comes along in their mid-30s at the moment they're ready to commit and there's a happy-ever-after ending. But a growing number of women are finding themselves alone and unhappy. In a woman's sexual freedom, she fails to mention the consequences of numerous venereal diseases, infertility, and even death for some. Many women pursue careers and gain a mountain of debt that prevents them from being able to stay home and raise their precious babies so she is still believing the lies feminism promises. This doesn't sound like freedom from the shackles to me.

She also believed the lie that men want powerful and strong women who can provide for themselves. To her dismay, she found out the opposite was true. All had grown-up children, all were the principal breadwinners, and in four out of five cases the men left for younger and far less ambitious women. I reckon they thought that the wives they left would be just fine without them; that they'd tough it out. These women found out that their power diminished their husband's role of being protector and provider.

This author's marriage broke down when she was 56 years old. My marriage broke down around the same time. I was 56 and my son 19. My husband, who had always supported me in my career, made the remark: "After your breakdown, you became tougher. I think it was good for you to toughen up, but it wasn't good for me." A study revealed that those husbands who are more financially dependent on their wives are more unfaithful. We can't think we can escape from God's ordained roles and there won't be terrible consequences.

She sums up her article with these sobering words:  You could call it a work in progress, but unless we acknowledge the impacts of change on our physical and mental health and relationships, rather than dismissing them as scaremongering and anti-feminist, women will continue to pay a very high price indeed for so-called equality.

The ONLY answer to this problem is to go back to God's ordained path for the sexes. I see way too many young Christian women with higher education who know more than me and God's ways. They have feminist's tendencies that lead them away from fully embracing God's plan for women. They can't help but learn these feminist's lies in the present educational systems of today, including Christian institutions. It grieves my heart. I don't understand why they don't have "Keepers at Home," "Homemaking," "Child Raising" and "Marriage" courses in all the Christian colleges since these are along the line of what God wants for women, not high-powered careers that they are stuck with for the rest of their lives that keep them away from their home and marriage.

Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, 

and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, 

and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. 

Jeremiah 6:16

Hidden Years with God {Health Update}

My life is hidden with God. I have missed MANY things in my life: weddings, vacations, eating out, get together, parties, etc. My health problems {brain tumor, neck fusion, and weak gut} have caused me to miss out on life and living. Or have they?

I used to look at Facebook and see all those I know having a wonderful time while I was home in pain. It used to make be envious, but it doesn't anymore. I know, without a doubt, that I am right where God wants me to be. I am hidden with Him. Due to my health, I learned I could write! I learned I could blog and minister to other women right here in my home. I woke up one morning over four years ago and decided I would try blogging. I didn't think I was a good writer at all but I knew I LOVED to teach. I sat at my computer for a minute and thought, "What should be the name of my blog? Always Learning. That's what I'll call it." You know the rest of the story.

Ken has been encouraging me to write a book. One morning last year, I woke up and decided to write a book. I thought, "Mmmm, what should I call it? I thought of a name right then and there. {I don't want to say it in case I ever publish it!}" I spent the next few weeks writing it. It didn't take long. You see the length of my posts. It doesn't take me long to write what I want to write. After writing a bit, I told Ken, "I don't have anything else to say. It's not very long but I'm done. I said all I needed to say!" My sister told me she enjoys books that aren't that long since long books usually say the same thing over and over again. We may or may not publish it. We'll see.

Anyways, God has used me in my hidden years with Him. He's allowed me to minister to many women. During my many sleepless night, He puts a song in my head praising Him that plays over and over again that gets me through the pain-filled nights. Every morning, I teach the Word of God to the chat room and by texting some women who I've mentored over the years. Every morning, I spend time in His Word marking up my Bible with highlighter pens. I love studying the Word of God. It NEVER gets old. I've become a MUCH better wife. Just ask Ken! We rarely argue anymore and if a discussion begins to get a little heated, I back off quickly knowing that arguing is not pleasing to the Lord and in arguing, I'm not respecting him. Ken, more often than not, feels  respected and appreciated by me now. We LOVE being married to each other!

It took Paul over 14 years after his conversion to begin his ministry {Galatians 2:1}. Moses was in the desert MANY years before he led the Israelites out of Egypt. If you are in a hard, painful place, don't be discouraged. You are right where God wants you to be. You may not be a writer or blogger, but every person has a special gift from God and He will give you a ministry right where you are even if it is simply praying for others, which this world desperately needs.

As long as God is on His throne, which is forever, He will use you for His purposes. Rest in this knowledge and allow Him to mold you into the image of His dear Son during your hidden years with Him.

For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

Colossians 3:3

***I had my yearly MRI several weeks ago to see if my brain tumor had grown or not. It'll always be nerve wracking during the waiting period between the MRI and the doctor's call. He finally called and said that it was either the same size or a bit smaller. {Cyber Knife doesn't get rid of the tumor; it's purpose is to "control" the tumor from growing.} I am also seeing a naturopath to test my hormones and supplement any that may be fading from damage from the radiation. I'll get the blood results in several weeks to see how my little pituitary is holding up! {It's been smashed several times, manipulated by neurosurgeons as they tried to remove the tumor and radiated, so it's been quite beat upon.} My vision continues to be very good; no change at all. Praise the Lord!
picture source

How to Train Your Husband?

Training your husband isn’t any different than training a dog according to Dr. Wendy Walsh, a clinical psychologist. She recommends tackling one problem at a time. Ignore the bad behavior you don’t want to grow and reward the behavior you want to grow. 

First, communicate clearly what behavior you want changed. Tell him once and then never say it again because if you do, your nagging will become a positive reward; he’s getting your attention. {I can't believe any husband would say that nagging is a positive reward!} Figure out his positive reward system; what does he like? Catch him being good. As soon as he does something you want him to do, go and reward him right away. It could be a kiss, a hug or “thank you so much”; positive, emotional stroking.

Never use the “c” word; could you or can you do that? Men hear, “She thinks I’m not good enough and I can’t even do that.” If you say, “Can you put your clothes away?” He hears, “Sure I can do that but I’m not gonna.” Instead say, “Would you…”  or “Please do this…”

If he doesn’t know he’s doing something, awareness has to happen first. Then when he’s aware, see if he’ll be agreeable to have you kindly remind him whenever he does it.

Your husband can’t know about this method because if he knows about it, he’ll know it’s a game. You do it without ever letting them know. You let them know clearly the behavior you want them to change and then you catch them being good and reward it. This is how the pleasure principle works. They naturally begin to do things that get positive rewards. This also works for training a wife by a husband or a child. We always want a reward.  Any organism will go for that reward. 

So what do you think of Dr. Walsh's method of training your husband? Dr. Walsh was speaking to women who wanted their husbands to take care of their laundry, clean up after themselves after eating and cleaning the kitchen, and other habits that these wives don't like. None of them were sin issues; just things that annoy the wives.

I definitely agree with the Dr. about clearly explaining in a kind manner what you'd like your husband to do or not do and then not speaking about it again; not nagging, complaining or manipulating. I also agree about giving our husbands a lot of "strokes," but what I disagreed with is the fact that these women were expecting their husbands to take care of their laundry and clean up the kitchen after working all day while the wives were home. Of course, this is NEVER mentioned. Instead, tools are given for the wives to use in order to get what they want their husbands to do. They aren't bad tools but it would have been great to encourage the wives to not expect those things from their husbands since they were created to be their husband's help meets. Also, it isn't a wife's job to "train" her husband!

Can you see how wives working full-time is even more detrimental to marriages? Both spouses come home tired and wanting to relax. No one is in charge of the home and fixing food so arguments begin and there's no easy solution. Husbands were created to NEED a help meet. Women were created to be a man's help meet. If many wives refuse to be their husband's help meet, why would most men want to get married??? There's no benefit for them. Do you see why so many men aren't interested in marriage anymore?

And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; 

I will make him an help meet for him.

Genesis 2:18

Single Motherhood Is Unhealthy

Parenting alone takes a toll on women's health. A number of studies show that single mothers have a number of health risks; overall mortality, cardiovascular disease and mental health issues. Stress is probably the major factor. “I never get a break,” exclaimed one mother. “The most important finding was that single mothers in almost all countries had poorer health as they reach older age than women who are married," said the study’s lead author, Lisa Berkman, a professor at the Harvard Chan School of Public Health and director of the Harvard Center for Population and Development Studies. "They have a difficult time performing…things like climbing stairs, getting around, cooking."

I always find it amusing when “studies” prove what God’s Word teaches us and was written thousands of years ago! When I teach women to stay married and be keepers at home, I’m not teaching them this to make their lives miserable and punish them. No, I’m teaching it because I know it is what is best for them, their marriages and their children. Now, studies even prove it is best for their health.

Being a happily married women and keeper at home keeps women busy enough without the added stress of trying to raise your children alone and make sure they are provided for. God NEVER intended it to be this way, yet our society, even Christians, promote women getting high educational degrees and careers instead of learning what it takes to be a godly, submissive help meet and a great mother to their children. These things are considered second best and need not be taught.

Women are divorcing their husbands in droves today because they are not "happy." Losing their health and shortening their lives is NOT going to make them more happy. They need to be encouraged to stay faithful to their vows. Obey God. Let no one tear asunder what God has made into one flesh. God's ways are for our good and our best. Man's ways will NEVER even come close to how good our Lord's instructions are to us.

If there are some single mothers in your life from no fault of their own or even from their own fault, do everything you can to support them and be there for them. If you have time, go help them. If you have money, give them some money. Do what you can to minister to them and try to make their lives easier. Be Jesus to them! Don't ever punish them for the choices they have made, for this isn't our job. They are suffering enough.

If you are married and a keeper at home, yet you are feeling exhausted, read my post When Do Mothers Get a Break? for suggestions on handling raising young children. Young women weren't made to do it alone. Older women need to step it up and help the young women in their lives. Raising a godly generation is the single most important thing anyone can spend their life doing. It is never wasted time!

Therefore, women, continue to encourage those in your lives of the importance of staying married to the man of their youth and being home full-time to care for their husband, children and home. You may think your words are falling on deaf ears but God's Truth and His ways never come back void!

The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becomes holiness, not false accusers, not give to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Titus 2:3-5

Confessions Coming Out; Balancing Truth and Love

This may be hard for some to believe, given the stand on Bible truth that Lori and I may take, that I have friends I love dearly who are adulterers, embezzlers, gay, and yes, a few that are quite self-righteous. I have had long, caring discussions with husbands who are sleeping with another man’s wife, with gays about the hardships of being gay, and enjoyed myself at gay parties that were quite ordinary. Much like many believers, I try to take Jesus with me as I crisscross North America and Europe helping people as I consult with their businesses. About eighty evenings a year for 34 years I've spent with the privilege of entering into the lives of all sorts of people, saints and sinners, becoming their friend, and coming to love them deeply. 

For some, it is incongruent that a Christian can stand strong on God’s truths as the Bible clearly teaches, yet is able to accept people right where they are; no condemnation, no demand for change, no judgmentalism, just good, honest conversations sharing life. At times we agree and at times we disagree on what we believe, but we always agree that we can be friendly as we share life and common goals together. The battle for truth and ideas should never impact how we see other people as people. 

My question is, "Why can’t a Christian be understood as one who stands firmly on God’s truth as best they understand it, without our being condemned as being judgmental, or even worse, 'hateful?' Why can’t I have friends who have struggles in life, believers and unbelievers, and love on them while not watering down what God has to say in His Word?" Hey, I can’t perfectly live up to God's ways, so why would I expect that my friends will? Jesus says we are “to be perfect as our Father in heaven is perfect” and yet there is no chance of this happening apart from the indwelling power of the God of the universe that comes from His saving grace. If I struggle with sin after receiving God's grace, how much harder must it be for one who does not taste of His grace daily?

I have my own set of weaknesses and temptations, so I will not cast a stone at anyone. But I will try to “speak the truth in love” to all my friends and all who will listen that right and wrong exists, truth exists, even if I cannot fully live up to it. Jesus said, "I am the way the truth and the life, and no one comes to the Father except through me." How will my friends know this narrow way to God if you and I who have found Him do not tell them? Truth must be balanced with unconditional love.

It is certainly true that we who are believers need to speak less and love more when we are face-to-face with those who may throw up over God’s Word. Just as no husband or wife has come out from under his/her spouses critical spirit to be a better person, no friend will come out from our critical spirit jumping for joy at the thought of accepting the Lord Jesus as Savior by our negativity and attacks.  I am still trying to learn to follow the words of St. Francis of Assisi who said, “Preach the gospel, and if necessary, use words.”

Much like a wife is to win her disobedient husband by her chaste and godly behavior, and not her words, so too the Christian must live a joyful life before our friends, loving on them, even as they may have sins committed the night before that are quite awful. As I have said to many men who are struggling with porn, or other sexual sins, “It doesn’t matter.”

“What?” says the friend, “How can you say it doesn’t matter when I am filled with guilt and pain over it?”

“It doesn’t matter because your sins, no matter how grave, no matter how many, are all laid at the foot of the cross in 30 A.D., the moment you believe and placed upon Jesus by faith. It is your faith that matters. Faith that teaches us not to look at past sins, but instead look forward "and sin no more." 

Jesus does not condemn the sinner, but gives hope that no matter how deep the despair and the bondage of sins, Christ has already provided the answers and forgiveness for sins; past, present and future. For “He Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for those of the whole world” {I John 2:2}. This is correct, ALL of the sins of the whole world are hung on the cross, but in order to receive forgiveness one has to accept it by way of believing in the Lord Jesus Christ. I don't make the rules, God does.

So in my confession of coming out, I want to make sure that it is clear that I plan on continuing to love all of my gay friends, those struggling with worse sins, and anyone who God chooses to put into my journey of life.  The Josh Duggars of this world, Bruce Jenners, and yes, even Dennis Hastert, every sinner and self-righteous person is welcome at my dinner table where we can share life; true, authentic life, filled with differences of opinions, yet knowing that we are all on a journey together. Even the haters are welcome, so long as they will allow me to be me, and all that God is calling me to be, just as they are free to live life as they choose.  Just don't expect me to condone or enter into your sins.

All I as a Christian ask for is the same kindness and consideration I see as, “common human decency,” that should be given to all people everywhere, no matter what their religion, race, gender or sexual orientation; the same decency Christ showed to the sinners, saints and self-righteous Pharisees. Allow Christians to exercise our American right to free speech in telling the world that we are against all sins, even those we commit ourselves. 

Most importantly, we do not have to be perfect to be outspoken on those things we believe are most harmful to society and the family unit, like divorce and gay marriage. But if you get divorced, or you desire a gay marriage, we love you as a fellow person, and intend to give you the same common respect and decency that we want from you in return. We're just two people on a journey sharing life but filled with grace for each other; the same respect and decency Lori and I must give each other daily when we stumble into sin or missteps. 

Hate has no place in a free world, and especially not in the battle of ideas and truth on hot issues like abortion, gay marriage and immorality. We can disagree with our friends and fellow human beings as we "come and reason together," but more so, as we learn to enjoy each other as one person sharing life with another and trying to help make your life better because you knew me; just like Jesus did at the table with the publicans and sinners like me.   

Come let us reason together, says the Lord: 
though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow; 
though they be like red crimson, they shall be as wool.

Isaiah 1:18