Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Sophia Loren On Motherhood


This was written over 30 years ago by the very famous actress Sophia Loren in her book Women And Beauty.

You may have guessed by now that I believe that motherhood is the greatest role of my life. Nothing, not even winning an Oscar, can compete with the pleasure and sense of accomplishment it has given me. I believe that all women feel an instinctive urge to make a family. Some women may use this desire creatively in their work or by living lives devoted to ideas. For me, nothing could substitute for motherhood.

When I became pregnant, my concern for my career evaporated. Nothing mattered to me but my baby. If necessary, I would have given up my work to have a child. If this means I am not modern, then I am not modern. I believe an infant needs to be with its mother as much as possible. 

This closeness, the endless flow of attention are the accumulation of love that a child carries through his life as a heritage. If you are lucky, your early childhood memories are intense, warm moments of love, of security, of your mother watching you or helping you. 

It seems to me that people with these happy memories are content as adults because they can still recall the powerful security of being totally loved, while those with memories of being frightened and abandoned find it difficult to find real peace and happiness.

I am aware of the implications of what I am saying, and to be honest, a part of me hopes that it is not true. I know that many women today leave their babies at an early age to go back to work. 

I truly hope that these children will grow up joyful and that my ideas are outdated. But I wouldn't be honest if I said that I thought a few hours in the evening after a day's work could substitute for day after day spent with your baby.

If you share this desire for children and a yearning to be with them, don't worry about not being modern. Follow your instincts and enjoy your children to the fullest. If you feel secure in your pleasure at being a mother, your children will sense it and life will be easier and happier for the whole family.  {pg. 184}

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be...keepers at home.
Titus 2:5

Comments (19)

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I love this! I had no idea she felt this way. Thanks for sharing.

Blessings,
Marcia
Is the whole text by ophia Loren? I like it.
1 reply · active 664 weeks ago
Yes, it was all written by her.
Fabulous, Sophia! Whoa. Couldn't have said it better... and couldn't agree with her more!
Awww so true. I make sure to tell me daughter many times a day the things I love about her. She always gets a little smile on her face when I tell her how great I think she is and how much I love her. Makes my day (and makes hers too).

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I never had those feelings of safety and security even though I had an at home mother. Her heart was not in it and she was indifferent to and resentful of all five of us. I don't ever recall her being happy when I was a child. My siblings and I all learned, on our own, how to be loving and caring parents. Thankfully our kids have become better parents than we were.
1 reply · active 664 weeks ago
My mother always seemed so overwhelmed and unhappy too, Jan. Every time I read something like this or hear stories about how loving everyone else's mom was, I just can't imagine how that would feel. I'm sure to tell my boys how much I love them every day and show them that I am interested in them and the things they like to do. I couldn't imagine not doing that or feeling like they're such a burden to me. We have so much fun together and they bring me so much joy. Hopefully they'll do the same for their kids one day.
thank you for sharing. I didn't know she wrote this.
Linking up from living well.
ERDR'swifemomof12's avatar

ERDR'swifemomof12 · 664 weeks ago

She is a true beauty, but her inner beauty outshines her outer beauty in these lovely thoughts. Her words present the simple crux of the whole matter. This is a no brainer to those of us who had such a mother. We simply could not imagine any other way. I am passing my mother's heritage on to my twelve children not only because it's the only way my heart could imagine, but because they will do the same. It's natural. The world needs to return to the old, forever ways and forget all this modernity and post-modernity in regards to relationships. One mother at a time!
Wow, that was so powerful. Thanks for posting this! A wise man once said no other success can compensate for failure in the home, and this is the perfect example!
This is really amazing someone in Hollyweird said something like this about Motherhood and resolved in her views to stay home with her children early on. I, too feel very much like this. I made the decision 24 years ago to leave the work force to become a 24/7 SAHM - the best choice for my wee baby, my new family, and myself. I do not regret one bit having abandoned my career to take on such a meaningful role, as Mommy.

This is a very good post. Thanks for sharing it & reminding mothers today of the value their place is in the home. It was great having you link up with Wayback Wednesdays!
~Cathy
I knew Sophia Loren had been a great mother but I never read these words before. Powerful words. Another woman who felt very strongly about motherhood was Jackie Kennedy. She felt if you didn't raise your children right then nothing else you did in life really mattered. And I believe Princess Grace of Monaco felt the same about motherhood.
Awesome. I didn't know who wrote this! What a powerful word to leave behind. Thanks for sharing. Stopping by from Homemaker's Challenge.
wow, great post! with these words, she show that she is beautiful not only physically!
I just wanted you to know I really appreciate this post. My daughter is expecting her first child (my first grandchild). I printed this out to put in a binder on motherhood I created for her baby shower. http://thelegacyofhome.blogspot.com/2012/07/hosti...

This is perfect encouragement for her! Thank you!

Blessings
Mrs. White
The Legacy of Home
Ms Loren left two legacies: her movie roles and her children.
These are GOOD words!
It's great to read this encouragement for tradtitional motherhood coming from someone with such a "high profile" in the media.
I so agree with this:
."If you feel secure in your pleasure at being a mother, your children will sense it and life will be easier and happier for the whole family."
Amen!
Thanks for linking up to Heart & Home, Lori.
Have a very blessed day...Trish
Eye opening! I wonder if she is still living and how her family is today. Great post, Lori!!
Alsoa parent's avatar

Alsoa parent · 662 weeks ago

I'm sure Sophia Loren is a wonderful mother--and she had a terrible time having children, having to stay on bedrest, etc., but don't lose sight of the fact that although she worked less after having children, she continued to act in movies, some of them big Hoolywood films and a lot of others that were smaller, Italian films. As a very rich movie star, she had nannies, etc., to help her with her children; it wasn't that she just quit being a Hollywood star and stayed home and cooked for and played with her children.
Also, keep in mind that she married her husband Carlo Ponti, the father of his children, when he was still legally married to another woman, and they had to get remarried 9 years later after he finally obtained a legal divorce.
I think this just goes to show that good mothers are good mothers, regardless of their lifestyle--even if they are not legally married to the child's father and even if they continue to be movie actresses at the same time that they are mothers.
Good for her!

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