Thursday, July 3, 2014

Teaching Self-Esteem To Children?

When my children were young and on sports teams, everyone would get a trophy, even if they only won one game all season. This just didn't sit with me right. I always thought when they finally deserved a trophy, they wouldn't appreciate it since they always got one.

John MacArthur preached a great sermon on raising children and brought up the question as to why children seem so angry today. Society has decided it was due to lack of self-esteem so we are encouraged to do everything we can to build up their self-esteem, ie, teachers can no longer use red pens when grading papers, teams can no longer keep score at games, we are to praise them for everything and anything, etc. 

This hasn't helped at all! What children need to be taught is self-control but self-control without heart transformation is worthless on the final judgment day. The very most important thing you need to teach your child is the Gospel. They need to know they are sinners with evil hearts in desperate need of a heart transformation which only God can provide. All the self-esteem your child should have really only comes from knowing who they are in Christ and all the blessings they have from Him.

Therefore, preach the Gospel to your children early and often. This is what they need, not self-esteem! Teach them about God's holiness and how He hates sin. Show them their sin and their need for a Savior. Remind them that there is nothing they can do to earn salvation. Tell them what Christ did for them; He became sin for us so we might become the righteousness of God. Show them how to respond to the Gospel by repenting and trusting in Jesus then walking in obedience to His commands. Obedience should come out of knowing who they are in Christ.

This is what children today need to be taught. Their value comes in being made in the image of God and God declared we are valuable {Genesis 1:27,31 ~ God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good.}. When He declared us to be very good, it was immediately true. When they realize who they are in Christ and the power they have living in them, they can walk in Truth, filled with the Holy Spirit who ultimately is the One who gives us self-control!

I have no greater joy than to hear that 
my children walk in truth {not have perfect behavior 
or perfect grades or be a star athlete, etc.} 
3 John 1:4