Friday, March 27, 2015

Difficulty of Being an Older Woman


It's not easy being an older woman trying to teach young women in this day and age. Submission is a dirty word. Keepers at home doesn't really mean being at home. Modesty doesn't include bikinis since everyone wears bikinis and children should be able to rule the home. Firm discipline is a no-no.

I teach things so contrary to even Christian women. All of the excuses I mentioned above have been thrown at me by Christian women. If you want to be an older woman who teaches young women, you must develop a tough outer shell and be confident in what you teach. Many older women just don't feel they can do it. It's difficult but knowing I teach the Truth of God's unchanging Word, having Ken's support, along with my Mom and Dad and many others, helps tremendously!

Satan has so manipulated the word submission that it is barely recognizable today. Most Christian marriages don't want to say there is one leader in the home. Both spouses are the leader. Little do they realize that a submissive wife is a strong woman. It takes strength to give up your will and trust your husband to lead. It takes strength to honor and resepect his wishes knowing that when you obey your husband, you are obeying God.

Many older women have a difficult time teaching young women to be keepers at home since they have careers and are hardly ever home. God commands older women to teach young women and I know this is a ministry that is badly needed in our churches today. Yes, I realize some women have no choice but to work. I am addressing those older women who want to work so they can have more money and stuff, instead of ministering to the young women around them in any way they can.

Modesty means different things to different peoples and cultures. The best way to find out what modesty is is to ask a godly man his honest opinion. He will most likely tell you the more flesh, the more difficult it is to not lust. Bikinis are NOT modest.

Concerning children; no, parents are to rule the roost. When children rule, chaos reigns. It isn't easy to discipline your children but it is something that needs to be done. 

If God commands that older women teach young women, it only makes sense that young women should have teachable hearts, willing to listen to older women who have good marriages and raised godly children. If you can't listen to them and trust their wisdom and experience, who can you listen to?

I just received this comment from a woman who I shared these thoughts with, "I agree, we need more women not repackaging the Word, as to not offend modern Christian women. Modern? God is timeless and His Word transcends the ages. Modern is an excuse to continue living from a position of "self," packaged as new and improved. How quickly we forget how appealing deception is; one of the empty promises of sin. Continue boldly speaking and teaching Truth. What a mighty ministry you have been entrusted to carry out. As Pastor Bob often reminds us, 'If the Truth is not acceptable to you, you are welcome to leave.'" ;-)

For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; 
but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, 
having itching ears.
2 Timothy 4:3

Comments (34)

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How did you and Ken handle the clothing issue in your home? We're there many disagreements between you and your daughters?
3 replies · active 522 weeks ago
I understand your thoughts so well. It's no surprise that principles for a godly house and family are foreign to the world, but it's very discouraging that so many in the church find them to be outdated as well. My adult daughter finds few Christian women friends who have been raised with Biblical principles for the home. They have extended knowledge of their careers, but training in operating a household, submitting to husbands and rearing godly children was not a priority for their families. On a positive note, some of the young women desire knowledge of homekeeping after they are married. It's refreshing to find them and to encourage them in those areas.
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Perfectly written Lori. I completely agree with you. It is wonderful reading your true-to-the-Word posts. Sometimes I feel so alone in my views. My church is Scripture-centered and the people in it are as well....so I know I am not "alone"...but so may around me (many who would call themselves Christians) don't embrace true biblical values. It pains me to hear of the Presbyterian church sect that is embracing homosexual marriages (and, I believe, even ordaining them). I am aghast at how people can claim to be of the Word and yet, truly seem to be of the world. :(
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
I just want to thank you once again Lori for being obedient to God and His Word. I WISH there were more older women who acted as Titus 2 mentors so I could have somebody in real life and not just over the internet helping to teach me these important things, but I am thankful for the internet because it has allowed me to learn from you and other Godly women.

I have found a lot of women use the excuse that it worked for their parents so why should it not work for them. (Like both their parents worked outside of the home/they went to public school/they always wore whatever they wanted/their mother rarely cooked/etc.) and they turned out fine. What do you say to women who say these types of things?
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Lady Virtue's avatar

Lady Virtue · 522 weeks ago

Lori, I for one am thankful to the Lord for the ministry that you have. I've learned to have a more Biblical mentality about womanhood through reading the Word, being ministered to by the Holy Spirit, and often visiting this blog. You know the Titus 2:4-5 responsibilities, and as you obey them, your conscience can be void of offense before the Lord, because you're doing what he told you to do, and it is bearing fruit. I am just one evidence of that, and I'm sure many of your commenters and lurkers would say the same.
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
You probably know by now Lori that I'm totally on board with you on all you are trying to instruct on marriage and family. I share most all of what you post on facebook so that it might reach a heart and soul that is ready and willing to listen. Then hopefully they start to make the changes of being a submissive, helpmeet to their husbands. I hear that a lot also tmichelle1.
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Please know Lori that you are also teaching older women who did not have the benefit of being mentored when they were young. Thank you for all you do.
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
I SO appreciate your blog. We live in a rural area in the upper Midwest, near a small town. There are very few older women willing to teach, or I should say, Godly women willing to teach. This blog ad several books, along with God's word and prayer, have helped me so much. I wish I could have an older woman to sit down with face to face, but I don't.

I do have a question about teaching. My younger sister was recently married and expecting their first baby. We are so excited for them! She has noticed my being submissive and staying home with our daughter has been helping my marraige and has asked me questions... Is it okay to tell her what I know? I've been sharing with her things that have helped, and suggested she find an older woman to mentor her, and she is having difficulty with that too. Is it okay for a younger woman to help like this? I'm just trying to figure out if I'm overstepping my bounds. I did mention your blog and just lent her some books that helped me. She and her husband are believers, but new to the idea of submission, her being home to care for her family, etc. My husband wasn't sure how much is okay to teach her.

Thanks again for your hard work and dedication to doing what God has called you too!
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Dear Lori,
Thank you for this post. You are such an inspiration and role model to me. I have realized that with a growing and strengthening relationship with God, all motivations to be more worldly or to not acknowledge sin for what it is in an attempt at acceptance from others has slowly faded away. I used to be quick to agree for the sake of "being likable" but now, I have a firm and solid hold on God's Word. I am persuaded that it is 100% God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness. Had I not seen this modeled out so eloquently from you, I would have continued to struggle in this area because I have been so conditioned to strive to be likable by the world, instead of God. Thankfully, you are willing to stand firm even in the face of opposition and therefore, people like me, whom you've mentored, are also willing to do this! You are fountain of Truth. Love, Psalm1Wife
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Your words are so true. It is hard living the "old ways", being an older women sharing with younger, even though I'm still learning God's ways every day. That's what I want to share with younger women, that God has given us all we need in Scripture! And as we live each day, we will see His Truth revealed more and more, discovering that the old ways are the best ways.
Thanks for being bold!
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Great post! I love seeing how the conversations of the chat group inspire your posts. I love what you said about bikinis and modesty. It reminds me of Romans 12:2- "And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God."

But what does the picture you used have to do with this post? Random! :D

The bride IS gorgeous, though!!! And is that your son? He looks so much like Ken!
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Yes, absolutely!

One troubling thing that I have noticed consistently is the phenomenon of Christian women graduating their children and immediately jumping back into the workforce. Translation = These older women become completely unavailable to help or mentor the younger women (like me!) who desperately need and want their help and advice.

The church has only contributed to this massive problem by encouraging women to "stay home when they have children" - the inference being that if they don't have children, they don't need to bother staying home, because a women's only purpose in the home is to raise children. Other than that, their position as homemakers is considered useless and is certainly not honored. "If you don't have children, get a job!"

I believe that the church needs to return to honoring the position homemaker - whether or not a woman has children in the home or not. When women leave the home, younger wives and moms are left without mentorship and physical help, and ministry (to hurting individuals and families who need help) is neglected or completely ignored.

Thank you for your wise words. Keep it up!
1 reply · active 522 weeks ago
Jennifer Dunn's avatar

Jennifer Dunn · 522 weeks ago

Thank you so much Lori for being willing to follow the Word of God and teach us younger women Biblical truth. It is contrary to the world and those who profess Christ yet still love the world. We are all always learning and we do need teachable hearts like you said. I thank the Lord he has given you much strength to teach the hard things. I don't agree with all you share, but for the most part, you are very sound in your teachings and I much appreciate it! :)
I don't see the church encouraging women to stay home. Than if they are at home raising children or not raising children, it is expected to be heavy involved in serving the church. You can't go to the church to talk about that because it comes across not wanting to serve. However, serving your husband and children is commanded first I believe. We have been in several churches and this is happening.

Thanks always for blessing us with the Truth.
Hi Lori,
I surrendered my life to Jesus On November of 2014, I used to be a per diem nurse but through reading God's word and His leading, I became a full time homemaker and it has been a blessing. I have been going to a " bible believing" church but I realized that most of the older women are working. When we first came there, the congregants welcome my family warmly. I wrote to an older woman in church about the importance of abiding to the Titus 2 for women. I am greatly disappointed that she has not responded and her close encounters in church including her mother gives me awkward looks. Sometimes, I feel so isolated. I love love your blog and I wish you live nearby...please advise on how to proceed..on whether I should stay in this church. I understand that there is no church that is perfect.
2 replies · active 483 weeks ago

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