Monday, August 22, 2011

Divorced Women

This post is going to be addressed to divorced women.  I, in no way, mean to judge, condemn, or offend them.  It is just something I have noticed lately when I have talked to a few of my divorced friends lately.  They have gone through so much pain and I have no intention of adding to that pain.  I just want them to think about something.

Whenever they discuss their previous marriage, they tell me all the bad things their ex-husbands did.  They go on and on about how they were hurt, their exes bad habits, what a bad father they were, etc.

They never say one thing they did to harm the marriage.  Maybe they were married to a jerk.  There are some real jerks out there.  But it usually takes two to destroy a marriage. 

The only reason I am writing this is to encourage any of you women who are divorced to ponder how you may have contributed to the destruction of your marriage, so you won't repeat it if you get married again.

Everyone comes will faults and baggage.  The sooner you admit and recognize yours, the sooner you can work on dealing with them.  It will make a future marriage all that much healthier.

I just want to tell one quick true story...There was a young woman with four children.  Her husband had an affair and moved out.  They had been to many marriage counselors and seminars.  Nothing was helping the marriage.

She read Created To Be His Help Meet and realized her part in the destruction of their marriage.  She repented to her husband, he moved back in, and they are rebuilding their marriage.

I am not saying this could solve every marriage, because it can't, but it is worth a try for the few it may help.  Everyone has their own story and they are all different.  I am just hoping that if you get married again, you can write a wonderful love story.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.   Ephesians 4:31,32

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