Friday, January 23, 2015

Since Being Married, He's Now Usually Wrong

Sean married Catherine a year ago. He wrote Ten Things I've Learned Since My Wedding Day. The one that caught my eye was this one, "I'm not always right. Not only am I not always right, but I find now that I'm married I'm usually wrong. Other husbands have told me this is normal." Yep! This is exactly how I felt. I was right and Ken was ALWAYS wrong. He finally figured out after many years that he can be wrong but not ALL THE TIME!

Why is this? Why do women think they are always right? Because we think we are the leaders. We want to rule our husbands just as Genesis 3:16 states, "...her desire will be for her husband but he will rule over her." Our desire is to rule over our husbands. God was right. Imagine that!

Most women think we know better than our husbands. We are smarter and wiser. We are more spiritual, emotional and sensitive. Bottom line, we think we ARE better than our husbands. Ugly, isn't it? God ordained them to be the leader of the home, yet we take that right away from them, step into their big shoes, and take the lead. Most husbands have NO idea what hit them and I think Sean will tire of it soon, as Ken did.

We are NOT always right. Even if we are right, we end up being wrong since we are taking the leadership role when it is our husband's role. We are sinning against our husbands and ultimately against God. Our position is one of submitting and following. This is exactly where God wants us to be. This is our safest place to be. God didn't put us there because He thought we were inferior in any way. No, He built men to be the leaders and protectors. This was His plan from the beginning and it will stay that way until the end of time.

One man commented on my Facebook page on a post I wrote for Crystal called Does Submission in Marriage Cause Abuse?, "I have found that when my wife submits, it causes me to be MORE concerned for her well being, not less." This is a profound and true statement! When a wife is always usurping a husband's leadership by fighting with him, acting like she is always right, manipulating and trying to control him, he is not going to be too concerned about her, but probably mostly frustrated and angry with her.

Therefore, women, let your husband be right. If you think he is wrong, share your opinions and thoughts with him and then let it go. Allow him to make the decisions and have his way. God will lead him even through his mistakes. It may take practice at first, but practice makes perfect. Begin asking for his opinions and advice. We are so good at always being right that many husbands begin to shut down. They don't want to fight with their wives. They want peace. 

Give your husband a peaceful home. This will be pleasing to your husband 
and pleasing to the Lord.

Blessed are the peacemakers: 
for they shall be called the children of God.
Matthew 5:9