Friday, March 18, 2016

He's Never Provided for Her

God made men to be the providers and protectors of women and children. But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel {1 Timothy 5:8}. Some men don't provide for their families and they are worse than unbelievers, the Lord clearly says. Men are supposed to work hard and bring in money so their wives can be at home taking care of the home and children. Women aren't supposed to be the providers. 

I love what Colin Campbell wrote about this,  
“Men, if you are out of work right now, do not sit around waiting for something to turn up. Do not send your wife out to work when her place is at home with the children. Take part-time work yourself. Work a couple of low paid jobs. Do not look to the government. This is a test to see just how dependable your arms really are.”

There is one woman whose husband hasn't provided for her in the many years they have been married so she has had to work and provide for him. It's been a difficult road for her but the Lord has been faithful to teach her many things through this time. Here are her words ~

"When God changed my heart from bitterness and fear over my husband's irresponsible behavior, I asked him to take me back {I had left him for 3 years)} even though he had a girlfriend and had just filed for divorce. I had left but refused to divorce him. God convicted me to write my undeserving husband a love letter in which I freely offered to follow him wherever he wanted to go, go to whatever church he wanted to go to and wear my hair the way he liked. I had all my rules about what a good Christian behavior was and it had been strangling me with legalism. God flipped my script and I felt great hope and joy. Willingness to risk my comfort has been vital to finding joy and peace for me. It wasn't that my husband wanted to dictate my every move; it was that I was so strong in my convictions that he didn't have a chance to lead. He was humbled and God worked in his heart in ways that amazed us both. My husband still has major issues but so much has been healed and regardless of his behavior, I stand alone before God and have many beams in my own eyes. God says we are one flesh. I have to take this on faith because it sure doesn't feel like it many times!"

She is walking by faith instead of walking by her feelings and emotions as women are prone to do. He is still not providing for her but she realized that one day, she will have to stand before the Lord and give an account for her behavior, not her husband's. She's willing to become a godly and submissive help meet to him regardless of whether or not he ever begins providing for her. Yes, he is in sin but he will have to answer to the Lord for this, not her. 

I love how she stated that she is a woman of "strong convictions" as I am but she is giving her husband a chance to lead in all areas of her life, even wearing her hair the way he liked. She is no longer in rebellion to him and has no more bitterness towards him.

If grieves me when I hear of women having bitterness towards their husbands since bitterness not only affects her in a negative way but defiles all those around her, including her children. We must not have any bitterness in our lives! We must love the unlovely and be warm and friendly. This is how others should define the way that we live our lives.

 This woman has grown in wisdom through her trials as we all do when we don't fight our trials but learn what God is trying to teach us through them. You are commanded to love your husband, period. It matters not how he is or what he does. Women, walk by faith in obedience to the Lord, instead of by your emotions and feelings and you will be amazed at the blessings that will flow from this; for we reap what we sow. 

If you are willing and obedient, 
you shall eat the good of the land.
Isaiah 1:19

***Here is a chart I worked on yesterday for the choices you have in regards to your husband when he is doing something that is sin and/or bothers you ~

This is a good exercise to do with any sin that you struggle with! 
It's called the "Disobedience vs. Obedience Tree!"