There are many women out there that believe if their husband is involved with pornography, they have grounds for divorce. I have addressed this in previous posts but still feel led to share more with you on this topic because of the comments I am receiving.
Pornography is an insidious evil. There is no denying that. I hate it. It leaves destruction in its wake. Most child abusers were addicted to pornography. It wraps its gnarly vines around many men's feet and they become trapped in its web.
Micheal Pearl wrote a great piece about it called Pornography ~ Road To Hell that I would encourage you to give to your husbands and sons. Warn your young sons about it so they will know to flee it before it gets a hold on them.
After saying all this, I believe wives need to stay with their husbands and win them without a word. You may be the only Jesus they see in their life. The Bible says ~
For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. {I Corinthians 7:14}
I am not exactly sure what that means but I think it means that as long as you are living with them, they are seeing Jesus and having His presence in their lives.
For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. {I Corinthians 7:14}
I am not exactly sure what that means but I think it means that as long as you are living with them, they are seeing Jesus and having His presence in their lives.
When a woman leaves her husband because he is trapped in sin, she leaves him without Jesus in his life. She needs to work on making living for Jesus look so attractive to her husband, that he will desire to have what she has and will want it for himself. If he already is a believer, you need to stand by his stand as he fights this battle.
God's ways are good. They are not always easy, but they are good.
A woman commented on a recent post about pornography. She had left her husband because he was involved in it. She was convicted that she should not have left him and is winning her husband back.
Lusting after a women is committing adultery with a woman "in the heart" {Matthew 5:28} according to Jesus. That is different than committing it in the flesh. If Jesus thought divorce was allowable because of lust, he would have said that but He didn't. He only allows it for fornication {physical sex between two people who are not married to each other}.
So if your man is involved in pornography, pray a lot. Continue to love and serve him. Be the wife God calls you to be even if he isn't being the husband he should be. You will be rewarded by the Lord and His rewards are very good.
He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.
Hebrews 11:6
KAN · 693 weeks ago
PJB · 693 weeks ago
Women who are married to men who indulge in the sin of lust must seek the will of God in their lives. God is faithful, and He will not leave them without His love and guidence. It might be that God will sustain them through an extended ministry of living together with a man addicted to pornography. It may also be that He will give them strength to refrain from the fellowship of sharing a home with a man who breaks vows in his ongoing unrepentant sin.
To separate from an 'adultry of the heart' husband does not leave him without Jesus in his life. Jesus is not so limited as that!
PJP · 693 weeks ago
Considering the fact that Jesus spoke regarding divorce for reasons of 'sexual immorality' only... a mere 6 verses after He went to the trouble of specifically defining lust as 'adultery of the heart' -- there is certainly a case to be made that our Lord might be speaking about the same topic, when it's only 5 sentences later!
You might also want to check on the meaning of the word used for 'sexual immorality' -- it was never limited to mean 'intercourse only' in the original language.
Ken · 693 weeks ago
Thayer and Smith Lexicon:
illicit sexual intercourse
adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.
sexual intercourse with close relatives; Lev. 18
sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman; Mk. 10:11,
metaph. the worship of idols
of the defilement of idolatry, as incurred by eating the sacrifices offered to idols
There is zero mention of lust or emotional or mental adultery as defined by this word. BUT, I do agree that each believer must seek the Lord in such trying and difficult issues and the counsel of godly believers. God has a way and perfect plan for each believer, but that plan must be based on His Word.
The word porneias appears to be limited to adultery... the physical act... so divorce apart from true adultery is not what God intends, BUT ... there is grace to cover all situations and the ability to separate from a man who is involved in overt and addictive sexual behavior,
Lori's point is valid to make Christians ponder what it means to "sanctify your husband" if he needs no sanctification? Will some never get to here the end of God's love story because they ran from the marriage without allowing God's grace to work fully through them to sanctify their husband's?
To KAN.... my heart goes out to you and yet you were freed to go and love another. That too can be in God's perfect plan that your sinning husband frees you by his action of divorce.
Tiffany · 693 weeks ago
Also, people must realize there is some pornography that is not tolerable and you SHOULD get out. Child pornography, for example, is not only abusive but illegal. When some one is that far into it, it is so destructive that no woman deserves to stay there.
Lori Alexander 122p · 693 weeks ago
Roxie · 693 weeks ago
At the age of 30 I gave up. I decided if I was alone the rest of my life it would be better than living with a man who could not keep 'it' in his pants.
My 2nd husband is a great man. Married almost 30 years. We still hold hands in the car. He is kind, he is faithful, and he is a good man. I am blessed. I know he is a gift from God to me.
Tiffany · 693 weeks ago
P.S., I really enjoy your blog! It's refreshing. :)
marj · 693 weeks ago
Shanda Oakley · 693 weeks ago
happygirl · 693 weeks ago
imperfect prose · 693 weeks ago
Carrie Burtt · 693 weeks ago