Tuesday, May 10, 2016

What Kind of Man Did You Want to Marry?

Before TheJoyFilledWife was married, she prayed for a husband who she could serve. Did you pray for a husband you can serve? Did it even cross your mind to pray for something like this or did you pray for a husband who would fulfill your fantasies of what you dreamed of in a husband?  TheJoyFilledWife is a wise woman! While she was praying for a husband she could serve, I was looking for a husband who would meet all of my needs. {This is a recipe for a disastrous marriage!}

When I was growing up as the oldest daughter of three, I had the normal oldest child syndrome. I was a bit bossy and controlling. When we were deciding where to go out to eat, I would push and push for my way.  I also didn't like to serve others at all. I much preferred to be served! It wasn't until many years later when I learned that "the greatest of all is the servant of all" and how a true servant of God lives their life. Wanting my way and wanting to be served didn't cause others to enjoy me much or want to be around me. It also didn't reap anything good but serving others reaps many good things: good relationships, contentment, and a true sense of satisfaction! It is also what God calls us to do.

Many of you are married to husbands who didn't turn out like you wanted them to be. They chose careers that you are not happy about or they work long hours and are rarely home. Therefore, you sit home and stew about it. The more you think about it, the angrier you become. Ken does some things that in the past would have irritated me. I would ponder them for a while and eventually a molehill would turn into a mountain. Then when the time was right {in my mind}, I would let him have it. Now that I am older and wiser about such things, if I can tell my thoughts are going in the direction of wanting to give it to him or be critical in anyway, I quickly remember that I am not his mother nor his boss; I am his help meet and I can control my thoughts. I chose to dwell on the good in him and what I love about him. He is a grown man who gets to decide how he lives his life, not me. He didn't marry me to tell him how to live his life and neither did your husband marry you for this reason. 

I have written about Joey and Rory before. Joey died of cancer a few month ago and many held a prayer vigil for her. Rory, the husband, told everyone to not only pray for healing for his wife but that they would have peace whatever God's will was for her. Not my will, but Thine be done. Since reading this, I have often said, "Not my will, but Thine be done" about many things in my life. His will is so much better than mine since He sees the whole picture. His will for me is to love, respect, serve, submit to and obey my husband. I know that there is no way I will ever be happy if I insist on my way. We are not here to be served, but to serve.

A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.
Luke 6:45