The command to husbands to love their wives has been transformed into a command that he make his wife feel loved. This subtle transformation turns a straightforward biblical command into a Sisyphean {endless and unavailing} task. After all, the wife herself is the only one who can pronounce whether she feels sufficiently loved.
Additionally only she can define the very meaning of the word love in this context. As a result, Christian husbands are now held hostage to the emotions of their wives. They must forever jump through whatever hoops their wives hold up in an impossible effort to gain her approval.
For example, if he watches a football game instead of doing what she wants him to do he isn’t making her feel sufficiently loved and is in violation of the biblical command. There is no escape from this rule once you accept the subtle change, as logically only she can tell us how she feels. {Dalrock}
In other words, women have become the leaders of the home. Where men battle their sexual nature, women battle their emotional nature. Women think that men's sexual nature is a far worse sin than their emotional nature. One can easily see the man's sin {lust, pornography, adultery, etc.}, whereas the wife's sin is much more difficult to see yet can be every bit as destructive.
Out in public, the wife can act warm, sweet, and friendly to every one around her but at home, she just may be holding her husband hostage using her emotional nature to take control of the home. {If mama ain't happy, nobody is happy.} I know I sure used it to control Ken but nobody except him knew it.
It's real ugly. Since women are much more into their emotions and feelings, if we aren't feeling loved the way we want to be loved, we can use it in all sorts of ways to make our husband's lives miserable.
We can deny them sex.
We can pout and stew if they aren't doing things our way.
We can roll our eyes and show them disrespect in all kinds of ways.
We can use it to manipulate, control them, and criticize them.
We can deny them sex.
We can pout and stew if they aren't doing things our way.
We can roll our eyes and show them disrespect in all kinds of ways.
We can use it to manipulate, control them, and criticize them.
Women using their emotional natures to rule over men in this way is destroying marriages. It is also being used to take away the headship and authority of husbands.
Start using your emotional nature to love and cherish your husband. Use it to make him feel valued and cared for by allowing him to be the leader. Stop using it to get your way. The word that describes wanting your own way is selfishness and selfishness should have no part of our lives.
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ,
the head of a wife is her husband,
and the head of Christ is God.
