When people have told me that wives aren't told to be obedient to
their husbands in Titus 2:5 since all other translations say women are to be "submissive" or "in subjection to" their husbands and not obedient, I
point them to 1 Peter 3:6 in which all translations state, "Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling
him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid
with any amazement." Yes, we are called to be obedient to our husbands as
the Church is to be obedient to Christ.
My favorite story in the entire book is in this chapter. It is about the young, pretty woman married to a stinky, mean man who never treated
her kindly until he, without notice, brought home his co-workers for breakfast
and she treated him as a king. She was a crown to her husband and eventually
won him to the Lord by her obedience to him.
Unlike this young woman, most women
spend their whole married lives in conflict with their husbands, trying to
change them. It is a battle of the wills that no woman has ever rightly won,
for even if she gets his compliance, she loses his heart, and he loses his
self-respect...A woman's greatest power is in obeying God through obeying and
honoring her husband. When she departs from God's order, she is setting herself
up to create a life of turmoil, bitterness, and defeat for both of them.*
Debi also tells a story of a man who was a "dope-head criminal who made his living dealing heroin."
When he was locked away, his wife divorced him and married another man in her church who had divorced his wife, since he was unhappily married. Everyone thought that this was just great.
Debi disagreed. What if this young wife visited her husband in prison and shared
the Gospel with him and even took her children to see their daddy. "Who
knows how many men in that prison would have heard the old, old story of how a
Savior came from glory just to save them from their sins, all because one
little lady was willing to live her life for Jesus by honoring and reverencing
the man who was her husband?"* Think of what an example she would have set to all those
around her, especially her children, of God's unfailing and unconditional love
for us. She would have had an eternal vision for her husband's soul, instead of
the shortsightedness she had in divorcing him for her own
"happiness," as if this is what our short lives here on earth is about.
Debi brings up three
issues in this chapter that concerns obedience to one's husband. What if you
are remarried? Be a godly, submissive wife to him! What about birth control? Debi wrote, "We
have noticed that big families are more likely to produce children who are
emotionally stable and less self-centered, with a better-than-average
probability of growing up to be a dependable, balanced adult." However,
a woman stands before God for her willingness to honor her husband;
a man's place is one of much greater gravity. He will stand before God for
the way he has led his family and the decisions he has made.* Therefore, obey your husband in this
area and give it to the Lord in prayer. Lastly is the question concerning
head covering. Your husband is your head so if he wants you to cover your head,
cover it. If he doesn't, don't.
As Elizabeth George
eloquently expresses it: “Our submission to our husband—whether or not he is a
Christian, whether or not he is obeying God—preaches a lovelier and more
powerful sermon than our mouth ever could!”
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands,
as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as
Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore
as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands
in every thing.
Ephesians 5:22-24
*Quotes from book.
