Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Baby NEEDS to be Put in a Corner!


Ken loves to stand up during worship at church while we're singing. I prefer to sit down since my lower back and feet hurt if I stand too long. On Sunday, he stood and I stood up beside him and asked him if he prefers I stand with him. He smiled and said, "Yes." I then whispered why I don't like to stand long. Later, we talked about it  and he told me that I was welcome to sit down after a minute or two if I start to hurt at all, but he does like me standing beside him. So I decided I will stand now whenever he stands. My desire is to be a submissive wife and even if I'm not perfect yet, I am a lot better than I use to be!

Another woman, Glennon Doyle, who has a blog with many readers yesterday wrote the following. She was at church and her pastor just finished a great sermon ~

"After he finished, I stood up in my pew and clapped and cheered and WOOT WOOTED and pumped my fists and well, my church is not that kind of church. And so Craig (her husband) said, 'SIT DOWN HONEY. HONEY, sit down.' So then I stayed standing even longer than I WOULD have because Craig is not the boss of me and nobody puts baby in a corner and submitting to your spouse is not really something we focus on much in the UCC."

This is how she ended her post, "ALL MANNER OF CHEERING AND WOOT WOOTING AND FIST PUMPING AND ALL THE THINGS!!! Honey, sit down. I will not."

Simply put, she is in sin. She is in rebellion to her husband's leadership by completely disrespecting him and is very proud about it, even bragging to the world. I can picture her pumping her fists at God in defiance, even as she cheers her pastor's sermon. After all, God did write the rules on life and godliness. I feel sorry for her husband. Imagine how many friends and family watched her husband beckon her to sit down, yet she defiantly stood, perhaps with a glare at him or pulling her arm out of his hand; a terrible witness to all the young ladies who may have seen her display of willful disobedience and disrespect. Pride got the best of her. Disobeying her husband makes him look weak as if he was asking something completely unreasonable of her, even as she was probably embarrassing herself and her church.

A woman who wants to be a godly, submissive wife 
would have handled it this way ~

"After he finished, I stood up in my pew and clapped and cheered and WOOT WOOTED and pumped my fists and well, my church is not that kind of church. And so Craig said, 'SIT DOWN HONEY. HONEY, sit down.' I immediately sat down and told my husband I was sorry for acting in a way that may be embarrassing to him. Then I asked for his forgiveness when we arrived home and he said, 'That's okay. I know you were very excited, but I appreciate you sitting down immediately and honoring my request.'"

Submission is NOT weakness. It is only a strong woman who decides to submit to her husband and respect the leadership position that the Lord has given him. Also, if your church doesn't teach submission, it doesn't mean you don't need to submit or not respect your husband. Your obedience needs to come out of your desire to please the Lord, not your church and what they do or don't teach. Remember, you need to be in the Word daily so you understand clearly what the Lord expects of you, not waiting for your pastor to get it right. After all, most pastors seem embarrassed and apologetic that God would even ask a wife to be submissive, though it is repeated multiple times in His Word.

You can put this baby in the corner any time, because this is where God wants me. Christian women, please know that the safest place for you to be is in God's corner. This is where God has called you to be standing and clapping for God's Word, no matter how much others mock you or try to tell you that you are wrong. God is ALWAYS right! He knows what He's doing. After all, He is is our Creator and has given us the written Word on how marriage and family life works with love, respect and submission from a receptive heart.

But I would have you know, 
that the head of every man is Christ; 
and the head of the woman is the man; 
and the head of Christ is God.
I Corinthians 11:3

Comments (34)

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This post speaks volumes! I find it surprising how much women get accustomed to not listening to and respecting their husband. I used to be the same way, but by God's grace I have improved greatly in this area. Little things that my husband asks of me, from which exact type of car wash he wants done on my car to color schemes in the kitchen used to anger me. I was so blind to everything that it never fazed me how badly I was treating him. Now the simplest requests from him seem so much more important to me. My mother told me to remember that even when no one sees how we're responding, God always does, and when we please our husband we please God. We attended the Vikings/Jets game over the weekend and it amazed me how mouthy a wife was to her husband that was sitting in the row before us because he mistakingly went and bought her the wrong beverage after she asked him to buy her something. It's humbling because I know I used to be the same way. Amazing how God's word makes you see everything in such a brighter light. Thank you, Lori.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Lori

'Not the boss of me'?, I think this is just awful and so rude and disrespectful, as well as not being submissive!. I don't know this blogger but am pretty sure that the person who wrote these words will be in the camp that says we have interpreted the bible incorrectly and shouldn't submit etc etc, or that there were different behavioural codes in bible times and the bible doesn't apply now in this area and so on. I am getting SO tired of people who try and change what the bible says just because it doesn't suit them!. If our views on ANY subject do not line up with the word of God, it is we who are wrong. Gods word is flawless, like silver refined in a clay oven purified seven times (Psalm 12)
Blessings
Helen UK
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Not only was that woman not submissive to her husband, but she disrupted the service by drawing attention to herself. She says it was a good sermon. So maybe there were people there who were under conviction and thinking hard about what they needed to do in response to the message. Then she gets up and puts on a circus and breaks their concentration and drowns out the still small voice of God that was working on them. There may have been someone who didn't get saved that day because of her. There may have been someone there who needed to do some changing and make some things right with God who didn't because of her. I have seen this happen several times after a good message when everyone is contemplating and feeling God start to work on their hearts and then someone stands up and "gives a testimony" or shouts or dances in the aisle and everyone's attention moves to that person and the spirit of conviction is broken. These things aren't always wrong, but they can certainly be done at the wrong time or in the wrong place. We're too quick to fill awkward silence or solemn moments with noise and boisterous activity - and sometimes it's to avoid feeling conviction. Sometimes we weren't feeling conviction, but we forget about the others there that might be. I suspect that God was using that woman's husband to try to stop her from disrupting the service and she was not only disobedient to Him, but may well have quenched the spirit of God and prevented work God was trying to do in someone's heart. Ignoring God's commands has far-reaching implications.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
That blogger that you wrote about has many strange posts. She writes candidly about her past. What bothers me is that she has such a large following of people who admire her. She has even been on television. She does work hard to do good for many people, but if our works are only to make us feel good; then God doesn't get the glory. Because her husband did grievously sin in their marriage, she now doesn't have a Biblical view of marriage.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
I too think that a submissive person would have immediately sat down when they realized their spouse was feeling embarrassed. Submission elevates others above ourselves, puts their feelings ahead of our own, and makes choices that promote the well being of the other person. In your story, the woman chose for her feelings of enthusiasm to govern her behaviour. She failed to consider his feeling of embarrassment at all, definitely not above her own. It was inconsiderate and unsubmissive for her to continue once she understood the effect of her behaviour on her husband's emotions.

I don't think her initial standing and woot-ing requires an apology, but the lack of good consideration after his request does. He isn't the "boss" of her, but he absolutely deserves to be honoured and loved as a spouse. Ignoring him is NOT ok. She is in the wrong.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Yes, I firmly believe you do interpret the Bible wrongly. You take one scripture out and don't bother to read the whole chapter. Case in point 1 Petrr 3:10. We don't oney our husbands at all times, everytime. First of all, the husband MUST be saved. If not, we do not submit to him. If he isn't saved he isn't submitying to God. God isn't his head. Read Ephesians 5 in its entirety.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
EVERY woman knows better. One doesn't even need a Bible to know better than to defy her husband. When we are trying to win our now husbands (like when we are first dating) we wouldn't have dreamed of doing anything blatantly against their wishes. Now that we've got him it is all about "Me first". Now it is a bunch of Biblical gymnastics and excuses as to why we should do what we want to do. When we was trying to get our husband's approval, it is about being sweet and kind and listening to his wishes. A woman who does this obviously doesn't care about her husband's good opinion of her any longer and therefore no longer respects him (which is very unloving on her part).
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
It sounds like Beth Moore to me? Is it? Now I love Beth Moore & I've heard some good testimonies from her...but it does seem she likes attention. My church has a Charismatic bent but even there, a woman's display like that would be embarrassing. I pray for that sister, that God convicts her of her foolishness & rebellious attitude, but I dare not judge her because I know at times, I am guilty of unbecoming behavior...but the Holy Spirit is teaching me! ( I much prefer listening to the men teach the Bible...but I won't judge a teaching ministry where a woman aims to teach other women.) Love & prayers, in Jesus, Cynthia
3 replies · active 537 weeks ago
This post is really great, Lori. You have such an eloquent and yet straight-forward approach to your writing. I have learned so very much from you. God bless!
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
I wouldn't even waste my time by reading that blog. She says that she does not believe in hell (just that we can live in hell on earth) and that everyone ends up in heaven. So totally confused on Scripture. It really is sad that she has such a large following.
2 replies · active 537 weeks ago
Thank you for this Lori. I shared this with some of my friends and one of them said that her husband also submits to her. She said that the submission is mutual..hmmm..not biblical at all.
I agree Ken that it is nice that our wives may give us the final say on something, but we have to be careful to not arrogant with our authority that God has bestowed upon us. This does mean our wives cannot make decisons and we cannot follow. Of course due to Loris health if she is more comfortable sitting in church than thats ok. But that is awesome that she would even attempt to stand because she was attempting to please you!! That alone is a strong message. Compromise is not weakness. It should be a genuine attempt to show grace, love and mercy!!
That lady involved this post of ignoring husbands request to sit was very disrespectful am out of line!! It stems just like the article yesterday about whimpy husbands and rebellious wives!! If that kind of outward rebellion is shown in church, wow what happens behind closed doors!! Yikes!!!
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Great points tmichelle1,

You wrote: "EVERY woman knows better. One doesn't even need a Bible to know better than to defy her husband."

This is one of the biggest issues I have with discussions like these that for some reason when the husband makes a request of the wife, much of being a Christian seems to no longer apply to some wives. Tell me if these verses that have nothing to do with wifely submission do not prove that she was dead wrong in what she did. Was she following any of the following Biblical commands?

"Submit to one another" (Ephesians 5:21)

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." (Romans 15:5-6)

"Admonish one another" (Col. 3:16)

"With all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, 3 being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." (Eph 4:2-3)

"Exhort one another" (Heb. 3:13)

"Do not bite and devour one another" (Gal.5:15)

"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." (Phil 2:3)

The list goes on and on how she did not act like a Christian towards her husband because of her selfish pride. Even posting the story after the fact embarrasses him and shows off her pride and self sufficiency, not a oneflesh, united marriage.

Why is it that Christian wives would have no problem listening to a friend who said, "OK, its time to sit down now," but come unglued at a husband making such a basic request? I think some women need to search their hearts and realize that the source of it all is their rebellion towards God, His Word and their husband, the same sins that started all this mess in the garden. Pride and self sufficiency, selfishness.
HappyHomemaker's avatar

HappyHomemaker · 537 weeks ago

I know I have already posted this on a couple of posts, but again, thank you so much for not making your biblical view politically correct. I love that I can read posts here that affirm what I read in my Bible about marriage.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Its just plain rude and thoughtless of this woman and she must have known it would embarrass her husband. And to stand in defiance even longer showed her arrogances and her lack of respect for her husband and her fellow church attendees. Very sad.
I read this this morning and while not commenting, this didn't sit well with me all day. So not only did she blatantly disrespect her husband in the original situation, but now she is bragging about it? I can't help but thinking this is worse than the first action! Shaking my head and rather speechless on this one.
1 reply · active 537 weeks ago
Mrs. Anonymous 's avatar

Mrs. Anonymous · 536 weeks ago

Ken,
I read this from your previous response, "Why is it that Christian wives would have no problem listening to a friend who said, "OK, its time to sit down now," but come unglued at a husband making such a basic request? ", and Genesis 3:16 immediately popped in my head. Especially in today's society and culture, us ladies are encouraged to "rule" over our husbands by the media, talk shows, and etcetera constantly portraying men as individuals that cannot make good decisions. If we follow that logic, why SHOULDN'T us ladies control our men if they can't make good decisions? Fortunately scripture contains the truth and we'll never go wrong if we obey The Lord!
When I first read the post, I thought what everyone else thought here. She was completely in sin and I could not imagine acting that way towards my husband, especially in front of our whole congregation. Then I thought about a situation that my husband and I were in that I would have said was nothing like this. However, I am so convicted now. I will be apologizing to my husband when he gets home. We were on a date a few weeks ago at a baseball game. There was a foul ball right near our seats, and he got the ball! A lady many rows away started yelling at my husband for not allowing her son, who was nowhere near the foul ball, to get the ball. It bothered me that she was yelling at my husband and calling him names. So, I said some thing back to her. Immediately, my husband told me to stop. I didn't like the way he said it. (rather than asking, but telling). I am so sinful. I said a few more things to the lady, as she continued to yell at us. In my mind, I was sticking up for my husband, and I thought that was a good thing. I realize now, that I don't need to do that. It was embarrassing for him, not only that I was starting/continuing an argument with a stranger, but that he saw that I felt the need to defend him, as if he couldn't defend himself. In the moment, I didn't realize any of this. Thankful for God's grace and His Truth in leading us to realize our sin and change! I know, even though it is weeks late, my husband will appreciate my apology. Thank you for sharing this story, that seemed so far from what I would do, to convict me in my own sin. I so desire to be the submissive helpmeet for my husband.

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