Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Dreading the Financial Implications of Coming Home?

One big problem I have with women working outside of the home once they are married is there are two men who they must submit to and obey if they have a boss and these two men can be in conflict at times; most women will easily submit to and obey their boss but NEVER their husband! God commands wives to submit to and obey their husbands, not their bosses. Long ago, before the feminist movement, once women were married, they were let go from their job. This was a great practice, in my opinion! 

There are many women who would love to come home full-time, even if they don't have children but they worry about their financial situation. F.B. Meyer wrote this, "Never dread any consequence resulting from absolute obedience to His command. Never fear the rough waters ahead...Dare to trust Him! Dare to follow Him! Then discover that the forces that blocked your progress and threatened your life become at His command the very materials He uses to build your street of freedom." True freedom comes from obeying God and His Word.

God never intended for women to carry the burden of providing for their families. Way too many women leave their home and children in the care of others to care for other people's home and children. If they are a waitress, they are serving food to other people, instead of their own family. If they are a teacher, they are teaching other children instead of their own children in order for someone else to teach their children. If they are a nurse, they are caring for sick people, instead of being able to care for their children. Most women leave their homes for a career that they should be doing at home and using their brains, time and talents for ministering to others rather than their own families.

All of the intelligence, time and talents the Lord has given to women are for raising a godly generation if you have been blessed with children, NOT for making a name for yourself "out there" or making money. Even women who can't have children will find ways to mother someone or something, even if it is an animal, a husband, other people's children, etc. God created us to mother; to nurture and care for others. If you have children, you should be using your nurturing and caring for your own family.

God is clear that he wants young women to be "keepers at home." Even if you don't have children, it takes time to keep a clean and tidy home, shop for and fix nourishing meals, minister to those in need and be a full-time help meet to your husband. If you are blessed to be able to be at home without children and you find yourself getting bored, find a ministry to get involved with; young mothers need help; old people need help; sick and injured people need help. There are many who suffer alone due to women leaving their homes for the workforce. If you have a job outside of the home, make sure the ministry you have been given to your husband and home are a priority and are not neglected in any way.

Once you are able to be home full-time and the budget is tight, be frugal and find ways to save money. Learn to live within your husband's income for where there is a will {in this case, it is God's will}, there is a way! If God owns the cattle on a thousand hills and everything else, He can certainly provide for you as you walk in obedience to His call on your life. If you can make a little money from home that doesn't interfere with home and family life, by all means do it!

Women have been cheated by the feminist movement. We can't have it all. Home will always be a woman's domain no matter how hard we try to get our husbands to help. Women were created for the details of running a home and a woman who works outside of the home will become exhausted quickly with having way too much on her plate. Her life should revolve around her home, whether she has children or not. Men build the houses and women make it a home. This is the way God has always intended it to be because He knows it is best for men, women, children and society.

Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord,
 and you have become her children if you 
do what is right without being frightened by any fear.
1 Peter 3:6

NEVER be frightened to do what is right and what God has called you to do!

Comments (17)

Loading... Logging you in...
  • Logged in as
Lady Virtue's avatar

Lady Virtue · 501 weeks ago

I am among those who long for and pray to be a keeper at home, even though I don't have children. I could certainly keep up the house better and devote more time and creativity to preparing meals for my husband. I'd also like to learn some other domestic skills (sewing, canning, preserving, maybe a bit of gardening, etc.) and minister to others at church more, but home and my husband are definitely my greatest priority. Your statement about women being cheated by the feminist movement is so very true. At its very core, it's antithetical to the Scriptures. The longer I've walked with the Lord and the more I read His Word, the more I see this.
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
Me too, Lady Virtue. The more I know the Lord and His ways, plus seeing the harm the feminist movement has caused upon women, the more I am convicted about teaching women God's ways since they are far superior for them and their families. Keep praying!
"One big problem I have with women working outside of the home once they are married is there are two men who they must submit to and obey if they have a boss and these two men can be in conflict at times..." - I work outside of the home in obedience to my husband (Praying and believing that someday I'll be permitted to return home full time.) and am blessed that my boss IS my husband (for which I am truly thankful). One problem area for me is that even though our business is small and family owned and operated, I deal directly with the customers. No matter what the situation, I side with my husband, but I also have to be the mediator between him, the customers, salespeople, and any other employees. There is a certain element in society who will fly off the handle and verbally attack the provider of a good or service no matter how high the quality or how low the price. Consequently, I have been cussed out more times than I care to count, openly propositioned on several occasions, and have lost more than one sale, because I wouldn't be dishonest about a selling price in order for the customer to save a few bucks on sales tax. All of this to say that even if a woman has her own business and doesn't have to worry about a husband-boss conflict, she needs to take heed..... As Sam Walton's famous quote goes, "There is only one boss. The customer." Thanks for another great article, Lori!
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
Thanks, Shelah! I don't believe women are built like men to handle these kinds of situations as well. We're better suited for things pertaining to home life. Keep praying!
I agree with you. I am a sahw with no children so I get all sorts of comments. I believe I should stay home and look after my husband, but everyone else puts me down constantly for it. I have to see my doctor for thyroid medication and she always asks me why I am not working. Another doctor said I was just a 50's housewife. My mother has been home for 43 years yet no one gives her trouble, same with my mil, who has been home 55 years, and I have worked a lot more than them in the past...Are they just jealous?
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
No, it's just our feminist society who values work done outside of the home more than inside of the home. You are right where God wants you to be!
Amen to every single point in this article. Thank you, Lori!!
Diana

P.S. I especially like your point about being at home even IF there are no children. Even in the church today, women are expected to be in the workforce if there are not children in the home. This is absurd, and a huge waste. Women are NEEDED at home - to be homemakers, to serve their husbands, and to be available to those who need help (pregnant mamas, women with young children, the elderly, people who might need meal support, etc.). We need to return to a godly view of the home. Women are not supposed to be at home just because it's cheaper to have mom at home than to pay for daycare. Having a high view of women and a high view of the home means recognizing that a woman's role in the home is vitally important regardless of whether or not she has children.

Thank you!
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
Great points, Diana! Plus, since women have entered the workforce many men can't find employment; many women are taking more spots in many of the colleges and jobs away from men. Men were created to providers, not women. The government has taken over this job for many of the single mothers. I can't think of anything good that has come out of women, especially with children. leaving the home.
Oh Lori, thank you!
I can bet you anything a large reason why we have so many sick people in hospital is because mothers aren't home looking after their families and fixing nourishing meals. Of course this is a generalization. but I think it has merit. For believers in Christ, the bible tells us that He will always provide for his children. Women therefore, should have no fear in coming home and relying on one income. God WILL provide!
Blessings to you Lori for another great post!
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
Good point, Anon. Way too many children are growing up on junk food and fast food since many mothers don't have the time to shop and prepare nourishing food which takes a lot of time; plus many children are obese today which almost always leads to health problems.
I love being at home with my husband and daughter. But since I've been home, I have had at least three mothers/friends ask me to babysit their kids while they're at work. I struggled with that and always have a hard time saying no, but if I would've said yes I would have ten kids here everyday. My husband told me not to watch any others (on a regular basis, emergency scenarios are okay) because it takes away from our family. It also bothers us because two of the families recently built large, expensive homes and now the mothers are working to help make the payments. Part of me feels like if I watch their kids, I'm enabling their decision. I hope I'm not being harsh, I just want to put my family first! Our house is a hundred year old large farmhouse that has been in my husband's family for four generations.... It's been maintained well yet it's still older, I like to think it had character. It's not fancy, but I love being home in it everyday and knowing it's paid for.
2 replies · active 501 weeks ago
If your husband doesn't want you to watch other children on a regular basis, then don't! You're a good wife and mother, Katie. Keep up the good work!
Katie, I know exactly how you feel! I have a sister-in-law that uses her Mom(who is single and works herself), other sisters, and me as babysitters quite a bit. She works too. In the beginning I tried my best to be able to do help her out, but as it has gone on I've just gotten plain tired of it, to put it bluntly. Like you said, I will help her out if she's in a pinch though. During the summer they spend almost every weekend at the lake. That is what they enjoy, so that is fine, but it seems like every other weekend they are asking one of us to watch their kids so they can have adult only time at the lake. So this summer my husband and I made the decision that we will only babysit for them 1 weekend this summer and that is what we have done. Don't get me wrong, I love my 3 nephews, but I am not their momma. They need their momma! I have 3 kids of my own to care for and I get stretched pretty thin with 6 kids at one time:)
Even a mom like me, still has to watch how much time I go away. This summer I had a car, while my son was away. Otherwise, I don't have a car. We are a one car family, but have a second car if we borrow from our oldest son. It was nice to have for Bible School and a day camp my daughter attended. However, I did find I did do more small local errands, just because I could.

I love just staying home and actually getting a lot done. It is peaceful on those days. The days I do have errands an appointments tends to be exhausting and chaos.

Again, a great reminder for us.
1 reply · active 501 weeks ago
In order to run an orderly home, a woman needs to be mostly home! You are right.
Thank you for your insight. As a young wife & mother about to embark on this journey of staying at home, I am nervous & slightly fearful. But I am sure God will provide xx

Post a new comment

Comments by