A young man asked me recently how I mentor women to "fight fair" with their husbands or how they handle arguments. I told him I tell them not to argue, period. I read this in my Bible this morning which confirms what I teach. For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal and walk as men? I Corinthians 3:3
Therefore, when you find yourselves arguing with your husband, which always brings about divisions, remember that you are acting in a carnal way and you no longer want to be carnal. You want to be a godly woman with deep roots in Jesus that can easily handle the meat of the word.
When you argue and quarrel, you prove that you are a carnal christian and can only handle milk. You are a baby christian. When you stop arguing and causing divisions with your husbands, you prove you are a mature christian that can handle meat.
I was a carnal christian, unbeknownst to me, for a long time. I read books on how to fight fairly with your husband. There were all these steps you must take and I would always forget all the steps. It is so much easier just to remember to not argue. Pursue peace with all men, especially your husband. This is what pleases the Lord and this is what he deserves of us.
Living a mature christian life is so much better. It is a richer life to live in harmony with your husband. For some reason we forget that God's ways are best. We know better. However, once we start truly living in obedience to God, we so wish we had done it years earlier and prevented so much grief in our lives and in the lives of others.
Stop being a carnal christian. Become a mature woman of God who only speaks words of edification and peace. You will love it and so will your husband.