How I Mentor Someone

Some women come to me to be mentored.  Others have been assigned to me from my church.  Still others, I get from emails or comments from this blog wanting advice.  Usually, these women are having trouble in their marriages.  They tell me all the things wrong with their husbands.

Since I am only hearing one side of the story and no one can ever know what goes on behind closed doors except the couple themselves, I work on helping the wife become the godly wife God wants her to become.  I have never had a woman come to me and tell me they have a quiet and gentle spirit, they are submissive, obedient to their husbands, desire to please and love them, and respect their husbands, yet what I teach doesn't work for them.

Very few women even know how a godly wife is suppose to act or be towards their husbands.  There is no way we can be responsible for our husband's behavior or even change them in any way.  We can only be responsible for our behavior and God gives us the best chance we have at saving our marriage or making it better, by becoming a godly, submissive wife.

I am told by God in Titus to teach younger women to love their husbands and be obedient to them so this is what I do.  Yes, the women many times continues to tell me the bad things their husbands are doing, yet I cannot do anything about it.  I can only help walk the wife through the process of winning her husband without a word and drawing closer to the Lord by spending daily time in God's Word and in prayer.

In my experience, I have never seen it not have a great impact on the husband. God's best prescription for women and marriage is in His Word. Sure, you can go to counselors, psychologists, etc.  There is a place and time for them but I would encourage all of you who have a troubled marriage to work on yourselves first, instead of waiting until your marriage is almost over to do this.

Submission is God's greatest evangelistic tool.  So I would encourage you to try God's ways first and allow Him to change your husband. In my mind, God's Word will ALWAYS trump the world's ways!  If need be, find a godly, older woman who can help walk with you as you learn to win your husband without a word.

Older women teach the young women...
Titus 2:3

***Remember, you are a new creature IN CHRIST, 
covered with God's grace and mercy, and walk in newness of life!