Always Learning: Jim Bob Is Frugal

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Jim Bob Is Frugal

Jim Bob and Michelle Dugger just celebrated their 29th wedding anniversary. Jim Bob planned the whole celebration without her knowledge. He wanted it to be a surprise. First he took her to a small type of art studio that does glass blowing. Then he took her out to dinner for beans and cornbread. They spent the night in a rather cheap hotel. Finally, he took her in a hot air balloon even though her greatest fear is heights {which was probably paid for by TLC}. Would this be your dream anniversary celebration?

It sure wouldn't be mine! Jim Bob's oldest son celebrated his fifth year anniversary with his wife and took her out to a fancy restaurant for New York strips. Going out to a fancy dinner would be more along the lines of what I would want to do.

Did we hear one word of complaint from Michelle? No, not one. She was always kissing him and telling him how much she loved him. She was appreciative and acted excited. Now, I have no idea how she really felt about all the surprises but from her body language and words, you got the idea she loved every moment.

She allows Jim Bob to lead even if he is leading her somewhere she really doesn't want to go. He recently wanted to start a farm. When he told her, she simply said, "Well, let's pray about it." They visited a farm and it made him realize he may not want to start a farm. It would be too much work.

Michelle is a great role model for women. She didn't get upset with her husband for being frugal on their anniversary even though I am sure they have plenty of money for a nice restaurant and hotel. She knows he is frugal and loves him anyways. She focuses on his good qualities instead of his bad.

He is the leader of the family. He definitely listens to her and respects her opinions, but he is the leader. f you are going to watch any reality show, this is the one to watch. The verse they use to raise their children is to love God and love others. What a wonderful nation we would have if all families lived by this verse.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your
strength and with all your mind;
and, Love your neighbor as yourself.

Luke 10:27

Comments (28)

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Heather · 598 weeks ago

Jim Bob sounds a lot like my husband. He loves to plan surprises but is very frugal. I could learn from Michelle Dugger's example. What a wonderful reminder! Thank you for the post!

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Cynthia Swenson · 598 weeks ago

I love the Duggers. They are wonderful & inspiring! Love & prayers, in Jesus, Cynthia

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Jeannie · 598 weeks ago

How is taking a wife who is afraid of heights up in a balloon "respecting her opinions"? I just don't understand that! It seemed to me that was the ultimate in disrespecting her!!

3 replies · active 594 weeks ago

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mvstephenson 44p · 598 weeks ago

They are such an inspiring couple!

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Michelle · 598 weeks ago

We have done both ( frugal and expensive) in the 24 years we have been married. The ones I remember most are the ones where we spent the least amount of money. He really took the time to think those times out to make sure I would enjoy them. One example is mothers day. I came home from work to find he had made a candle light dinner. After words he took me up stairs to a awaiting bubble bath with candles and soft music . As I soaked, he handed me a glass of wine then left. I had a whole hour to myself with out kids banging on the door. That's worth more then any expensive restaurant.

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kaygarland 20p · 598 weeks ago

If this was all televised, then it was designed to entertain their viewers and keep their "brand" going. Inexpensive dinner and hotel portrays their tv image and the blowing glass and balloon ride are things they hadn't yet done on their show. Got to keep the audience tuning in. What they may have done to celebrate privately--off camera-- is something we won't know.

2 replies · active 596 weeks ago

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Cynthia · 598 weeks ago

Yes, I think we need to keep in mind that reality TV isn't always a reflection of reality.

I didn't watch this show, but I don't think that hot air balloons are usually a "frugal" thing. It may have been that TLC paid or even suggested it, if they thought that Michelle doing something that terrified her would make for a more interesting episode than just eating a steak.

It's always good to be gracious when receiving a gift. That said, I have explained to my husband that unlike many women, I truly don't like flowers or jewellery, but am always up for vegetarian Indian food, a show or a fun activity. I also got a friend to go on and on about a local spa in front of him and strongly hint that it would make an excellent Mother's Day gift.

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Courtney · 598 weeks ago

I thought that episode was cute. Both Jim Bob and Josh put a lot of thought into their anniversary surprises. Are there really wives that would complain about that? My husband never plans big surprises or dates. He does little things for me every day, but big creative or romantic gestures have never been his thing. That is perfectly fine with me! I've never wished he was any different. But if he were to plan a big surprise like Jim Bob's, even if it was the last thing I wanted to do, I just think it would be so mean to complain. It's hard for me to imagine that anyone would be ungrateful!

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Fran · 598 weeks ago

Michelle's gentle and kind spirit of gratitude and graciousness allows her husband to lead in a way where he doesn't constantly draw attention to the fact that "I am in charge and you must obey/subject yourself....." Michelle's willingness to trust her husband and keep her eyes on the Lord's way enables Jim Bob to be a loving, God-centered leader who respects his wife's opinion and never comes off as dictatorial.

1 reply · active 598 weeks ago

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FABBY · 598 weeks ago

Oh, I loved Jim Bob's idea for their celebration, I don't care for the fancy restaurant kind, either, lol! Sometimes I don't even like them, hehehe I get perfume, or whatever I like and hubby cooks and I'm in heaven! I love Michelle's inteligence to just follow her sweet husband and even make him feel great and at times she makes him think by himself that what he's planning is not the best of ideas...like with the farm situation. Thank you sweet lady, this made me think what is really important.
Hugs,
FABBY

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PJB · 598 weeks ago

I'm really surprised that a for-cost studio activity, a meal, a hot air balloon ride, and a hotel stay is considered "frugal" in this day and age. I think a steak dinner would have been less expensive? Unless you mean that he planned this free-of-cost, because he chose to invite film crews to the celebration?

Anyhow, I'm glad Michelle was gracious. There's no reason to be standoffish when one's spouse is trying to be kind and loving... though, like some others, I'm not sure, "Let's challenge your fear of heights -- on our anniversary, on TV, you'll probably love it!" -- was an overly sensitive line of thought in the first place, even though it turned out fine. I guess if Michelle wanted a guy with high levels of that kind of sensitivity, she would have looked for that when dating. She's clearly got the kind of guy she enjoys and is very much in love with him still.

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Joluise · 598 weeks ago

A couple of things – balloon rides where I live (and its very popular here) are between $290 - $340 per person, not something I would consider frugal – I wonder if they got a discount! Secondly, this isn’t really about husbands as leader at all – this is about receiving a gift and enjoying it with one’s partner and having a fun and romantic time together. I would assume that if Michelle gave a surprise gift to her husband he would also behave in the same way. Isn’t that how husbands and wives should behave anyway.

PS I do hope my husband never gives me a balloon ride as I ter

1 reply · active 598 weeks ago

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Joluise · 598 weeks ago

Oops sorry I was meant to say:

PS I do hope my husband never gives me a balloon ride as I terrified of heights and he knows it.

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J Beth · 598 weeks ago

I can't imagine my husband doing something for our anniversary that he knows would truly frighten me. He's far too respectful.

1 reply · active 598 weeks ago

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Ken · 598 weeks ago

Is it possible what one wife views as "disrespect" is in reality no so at all? It is obvious from the story that she ended up loving the ride and adventure, so why not assume that her husband knows his wife well enough to pull off this adventure.. which ultimately he did.

I wonder what would happen in more marriages if wives stopped "feeling disrespected" and instead trusted their man so much to allow him to lead them to places they would have never gone on their own?

My daughter has a strong will, yet she allows her husband to coax her into many adventures she would have never gone on without her willingness to try and please him. She feels far from disrespected, but instead believes he will protect her and never take her beyond what she truly is capable of doing and achieving. She is a better and more adventurous person now, and loves it... and loves him for his leadership.

And of course, he he truly thought things were going to work out badly for you, a good husband would not push that far. Being a great follower means allowing one's husband some room to not just listen to you, but to trust him if he wants to take you to "new heights" (pun intended :).

Lastly, this issue can apply to many decisions in marriage. It would frighten my wife to death to move to Texas or Florida, away from family and friends, but if I felt it was best for her and the family, I would hope that she would trust em enough to jump into the adventure with me, with joy, even if the adventure failed. If a wife's fears are always to rule the decision making, a husband cannot lead... she is leading with her fears.

Perfect love is said to cast out all fears... so just as we throw our lives into the hands of the Father and say to Him take me where you will, why not do that same thing with the man you say you love and trust the most in the whole wide world? It will open up a whole new area of personal growth and oneness.

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Kelly P. · 597 weeks ago

In one episode Michelle went sky diving with one of her daughters, so she can't be too scared of heights. Praise the Lord for the Duggers faith! Michelle does an excellent job at pointing to the Lord (being salt and light to this dark world).

1 reply · active 597 weeks ago

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Lori · 597 weeks ago

I've enjoyed reading the variety of responses to this post. I know you have also. I'm probably the only person on the planet who hasn't watched a Dugger episode. My husband's too frugal to buy cable tv, and I wholeheartedly support him :)

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Elizabeth Ours · 596 weeks ago

The main point of this post can be applied in the opposite situation as well. My husband is not particularly frugal. My parents were very frugal, so I was brought up in that manner. It can be easy for me to criticize my husband when I think he is being wasteful or extravagant or spending too much money on something. I have had to learn to respect my husband for who he is and praise him for his strengths. Also, it is important that I don't compare him to other husbands, such as Jim Bob, who are very frugal.

The primary point of this post is that we respect and follow the leadership of our own husbands. When we disagree, we can follow Michelle's example and say, "Let's pray about this!" :)

Thank you for a great post!
Elizabeth (clicked over from Raising Arrows!)

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jodi · 596 weeks ago

We live in Arkansas and had just gone to the same place to eat for our anniversary just a few weeks before this episode aired. They do serve more than cornbread and beans and it is also the oldest daily working mill in the state. The War Eagle Mill is one of Northwest Arkansas tourist attractions. You just didn't get to see hardly any of it in the episode. I am truly inspired by this family and think they are great role models.

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