Can you believe that God commanded older women to teach young women to love their children? You would think this would come naturally for most women. However, just because a woman has deep feelings of love for her children doesn't mean she sacrificially loves her children as the Lord commands she love them for love has MUCH more to do with actions than feelings. If you sacrificially love your children, you will want to be home full-time with them; you will love their daddy and you will do everything you can to discipline them and train them in the ways of the Lord.
Many mothers seem to be too "sensitive" to discipline their children. They can't bear to say "no" to them or hurt them in any way. They even shelter them from their father's discipline when the Word specifically calls fathers to discipline their children. The problem with this is they are doing their children no favors. There will be many others in their children's life that will say "no" to them and the Lord's discipline will be much worse than your discipline or your husband's if they grow up to be in rebellion of the Lord's ways.
The popular "gentle" parenting is hurting children today. Yes, you are called to be gentle but firm by teaching your children right from wrong and obeying you immediately when you ask them to do something. When you see any signs of rebellion in them, nip it in the bud with a swat on the bottom or some other way that works but whatever you do, make sure you discipline your children so they will grow up to be disciplined adults. I recommend To Train Up a Child if you are struggling in this area. Yes, this book gets many bad reviews but they never teach parents to abuse their children in any way, as they are being accused. They raised five children to be joyful, disciplined and hard-working adults. The proof is in the results and they have produced beautiful fruit.
Also, train your children in the ways of the Lord. This is how Elisabeth Elliott's parents raised their children in the Lord. "Before I learned to read, I was read to, at least twice a day from the Bible and usually from another book or two as well. At family prayers, my father sometimes read a children's paraphrase of the Bible but when he opened his own Bible it was the KJV. We heard it seven days a week and consequently our minds were filled with thousands of phrases {effortlessly memorized} of flawless English and shaped by those majestic cadences. This was a priceless gift from our parents, which of course we had no appreciation for at the time. Growing up, I began to be aware of something far more important; my parents really believed that Book and honestly tried to live their whole lives in the light that it shed."
I took my children to AWANA weekly where they would memorize many Bible verses. I would also read the Bible to them every morning while they ate their breakfast. We were at church almost every Sunday. We tried to speak about the Lord and His ways often to them. This is one area that you must not neglect since their eternal souls are the very most important part of raising your children. If you have lost their soul to the world due to your negligence in this area, it will be the most devastating trial a godly parent will ever have to endure. Please teach your children the Word often.
Besides teaching them the Word and disciplining them, you must live out what you teach. Never let your children say you were a hypocrite because you didn't practice what you preached for our actions speak much louder than our words. Stop complaining and be thankful instead. They need to see the joy of the Lord in you which will attract them to the Lord. When they spill the milk or do something on accident, show them grace as Christ does to us. In all things, be an example of Jesus to your children. When you blow it, tell them and ask for their forgiveness. Be a role model to them of how someone who loves Jesus lives their life. Please take the time to discipline your children and raise them to know the Lord. They will one day grow up and be thankful that you did.
Now no chastening for the present seems to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
Hebrews 12:11
Now no chastening for the present seems to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
Hebrews 12:11
Logging you in...
Diana · 484 weeks ago
Anne · 484 weeks ago
I recently read on a Christian blog a mom giving this book a somewhat negative review-saying it did not work for her strong willed child. I was grieved for her. I feel that you must win the battle of the wills-everything is at stake. If your child can hold out for one hour, you must hold out for two. NOT because you are angry but because you love them more than they love themselves. Again, I am not a perfect mom but I was blessed to be given this book when my children were young and I am blessed to be their mom everyday now (time goes so fast, my oldest is in college and my youngest is 9)
I got to start homeschooling them when my oldest was halfway through the third grade-I worked till then so my heart is with the moms that have to drop their kids off and go to work for 8-10 hours. I would cry on my commute in.. Sooo thankful now. I have gleaned much wisdom from the Pearls for my children and my marriage. Thank you. Your blog is also a daily "attitude check" for me:)
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Also, there are websites dedicated to destroying godly books and blogs. They hate Christianity and what it stands for. I have been a recipient of this treatment and this is why I have to monitor every single comment I want on my blog. I only want comments that speak life and not death. They hate God so we shouldn't expect anything less.
Unfortunately, many of those moms who drop their children off somewhere to go to work want to do this. They much prefer this to being home full-time with their children. Those who want to come home, usually find a way to do it for with God ALL things are possible and He absolutely wants mothers home with their children.
Thank you for your comment, Anne, and your children are blessed to have you as their mother!
Talita · 484 weeks ago
Thank you Father God for being our provider.
We also get a lot of compliments about our children's manners. I also read 'To train up a child'. The moment I implemented the advice into my children's lives, I could see they felt more loved and secure. Our training according to God's ways is our everlasting inheritance to our children. It's not easy, but it is wonderful.
I was reading one of your posts to my husband the other day and he said he loves it that you are so straight forward. Thank you, Lori. God bless you and your family.
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Gena · 484 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Ken · 484 weeks ago
Hard work, serving others over self, seeking to please instead of be pleased all the time, kind words, controlling anger, watching out for what goes into the body their the eyes, ears and mouth, being on time, exercise, maintaining proper weight and nutrition are all disciplines that must be put on with the fruit of self-control. What few realize that the the punishments from a life with a lack of self-discipline is far worse than any pain of discipline one must accept to do the right thing in the first place. This is why accountability is so important. To have others help us to lead disciplined lives because we look into the future and do not like what we see as the results of our weaknesses or lack of self control.
As Lori has well said, probably the greatest gifts one can give to their children is an introduction to a strong relationship with Jesus, a love and security necessary to be whole, and the gift of a self-disciplined life lived with great self-control in all areas. It is never too late to get our weaknesses under control if we are willing to allow the Lord and others to hold us accountable.
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Amy · 484 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Anon M · 484 weeks ago
Lori Alexander 122p · 484 weeks ago
Genny · 484 weeks ago
I looked back on some of my old AWANA material and marvelled at how my elementary school student self was able to interpret scripture! Years in that program proved valuable in high school and college as I almost never struggled with Old English language in textbooks. I already knew most of it, it was like a second language! ☺
Joanna · 471 weeks ago
I actually live in a latin american country where my dad is a baptist missionary. I have a friend that has been really struggling with training her children, and I think parts of this post would be a great blessing to her. I say parts because she probably wouldn't understand the context of some of the paragraphs. I was wondering if you would give me permission to translate and share some of this post with her. I would try to be very faithful to what is written although I might have to change a few words for clarity. I will await your response before translating.
Thank you!
Lori Alexander 122p · 471 weeks ago