Friday, March 4, 2016

Extravagance Verses Prudence


Does your husband trust you to be prudent with the way you spend his hard earned money or are you wasteful? Do you hide things from your husband that you bought without him knowing? Can he trust you to use his money wisely? "Wifely thriftlessness and extravagance have destroyed the happiness of many a household and wrecked many a home. On the other hand, many a man owes his prosperity to his wife's prudence and her wise administration of household affairs." {J. R. Miller}

Did you know there are many verses about being prudent in the Word? The prudent acts with knowledge {Proverbs 13:16}.  She knows how much money her husband makes and lives carefully within his income. She finds the healthiest food she can to feed her family at the best prices. For everything she buys, she researches carefully for a wise purchase instead of buying things because she "feels" like it. She never wastes money but realizes that God cares about the way she spends her money and she wants to bring glory to Him even in this area. She prays for wisdom and knowledge in this important area.

The prudent sees dangers and hides from it {Proverbs 27:12}. She knows how hard her husband works and does everything in her power to keep her family out of debt and the pain of it. She is content with little, if need be. She keeps enough food on hand in case of emergency situations.

A prudent person heeds rebuke {Proverbs 15:5}. It is a rare person who takes rebuke easily but a prudent woman will take rebuke and use it to refine herself and make her more like Jesus. If her husband rebukes her about the way she has spent some money, she will do what she can to rectify the situation by taking it back or cutting out in other areas. She will do her best to please her husband and appreciate her husband's rebukes.

House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord {Proverbs 19:14}. A prudent wife cannot compare to house and wealth since a prudent wife is from the Lord! A woman who wants expensive clothing, days at the spa, fake fingernails, model homes, expensive cars with all of the latest gadgets, lots of shoes and expensive jewelry, etc. and spends a ton of money on herself is not what the Lord has called us to do with our money. Sure, we can spend some ourselves but not be extravagant. We are strangers and pilgrims on this earth and others should be able to look at our lives and tell that this is not our home. Things of this world shouldn't matter that much to us. Things of the Lord should matter, instead. If you have a husband who spends a lot of money, even more reason for you to be prudent and careful in this area as an example of being prudent to him for a godly wife wins her disobedient husband without a word by her godly behavior. You don't need the best of everything. You need godliness with contentment.

"Every true wife makes her husband's interest her own. While he lives for her, carrying her image in his heart and toiling for her all her days, she thinks only of what will do him good." {J. R. Miller}

She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:12

***If you want to learn prudence from a godly women, learn from Laine who decided instead of trying to make money, she would live carefully within her husband's income of $30,000 a year and save any way she possibly could.

Comments (18)

Loading... Logging you in...
  • Logged in as
Lori
This is a very convicting post and after your recommendation a good while ago I know have Laines Letters saved to read every so often!. I find (don't know about you), the older I get, the less I want. I am really trying NOT to buy for example, clothing, unless I need it for a particular reason or something has worn out. I used to buy alot more in my younger years but I find now I just hate STUFF and bulging wardrobes!. It makes me smile when my husband encourages me to buy something and I tell him I don't need it!. He tries to treat me but I find I need less and less!.
Blessings to you and both of you have a wonderful weekend
Helen
4 replies · active 473 weeks ago
Melissa M.'s avatar

Melissa M. · 473 weeks ago

I agree with you, Helen. This a really convicting post for me.
I am the same, Helen. I don't like to buy a lot of stuff anymore. As we get older, we realize so much more clearly the fact that it is all going to burn so why store our treasures here.
We have a thing we do with our homeschool community is a clothing exchange. We bring our gently used clothes to the church where it is held. The tables are set up by dresses, jackets, blouses etc. We take what we need and it's all free. That way our husbands are happy we are spending hundreds of dollars on stuff we don't need. There even a table for the moms to pick up children's and men's clothing as we open this only for women and girls. It is such a blessing to be able to bless other ladies with our stuff and recieve free clothing, shoes, etc.
What a fabulous idea, Regina!
This can be really hard, because sometimes you know the money is there, so you ask for something and hubby says no. But then he will turn around and get something more expensive and seemingly pointless instead. And you feel like you are being mistreated or punished. (And that's not necessarily the case) but it just seems unfair. However, this post is true and convicting. I heard John MacArthur speak on proverbs 31 once and when it talks about the heart of her husband safely trusting in her he explained in Israel, if a husband was going on a journey he would lock all the valuables away while he was gone. He said for the husband of the proverbs 31 woman, he could hypothetically leave a credit card with no limit in the middle of the table, go away on business and still see it sitting there untouched and unused when he got back. He knew he could trust her with it. That convicted me as well. Great post.
2 replies · active 473 weeks ago
One of the biggest disputes between spouses is often over how to spend the money. Wives often like to "spend a little here and spend a little there" and husband's like to save save save, go out and buy the new boat... that a wife could care less about. Getting together in harmony on this issue and being able to find a happy middle is important to a healthy marriage. Most husbands are willing to be reasonable, so ask for a budget for certain things then stick to it. When he asks why did you spend x, y or z, you just smile and say it was in my budget.
We should certainly be goood stewards of our money. The woman in Proverbs was a business woman with her own money. She considerd a field and bought it. She planted a vineyard from her earnings, not her husband's. Still not seeing where all she did was stay home with dozens of babies. It says her children rise and call her blessed. It mentions she had servants. Perhaps they watched her children while she was selecting wool and flax and considering her field.
Lady Virtue's avatar

Lady Virtue · 473 weeks ago

Quite interesting timing on this post for me. Just today I gave many clothes away to Goodwill; things that were in good condition, but I'd not worn in a while. Part of the reason that even happens is because I have too many clothes to wear in a year! I want to give away anything I've not worn in 12 months or to dispose of it if it has worn out.
1 reply · active 473 weeks ago
This is exactly what I am trying to do, Lady Virtue. I remember someone saying that if you haven't worn or used something in a year, your most likely hoarding and we should give it away since someone else will probably wear or use it.
I forgot to mention that I don't like or need a lot of stuff either. In addition to participating in the clothing exchange my friends will sew modest dresses for me. I have modest dresses that I can give them to pass on to other ladies.
1 reply · active 473 weeks ago
Good for you, Regina!
My husband has no interest in what I spend. I am totally free, and that's because he knows that our family's financial security is always on my mind. I have been this way since our dating days. It's just the way I am.
2 replies · active 473 weeks ago
He trusts you, Mara!
Likewise with us Mara - I can buy what I want and my husband can buy what he likes - he knows that the finances are being looked after, the bills are all paid on time, money is being saved and the pension fund is taken care of. Its only the big items like cars and white goods that we make a joint decision. Money is the one thing we never argue over.
Amen and great thoughts, Lori. My grandmother had a saying she quoted, not for certain but it went something like this: "Pity the man whose wife throws more out the back door, than he can bring in the front". Much truth to this saying.
2 replies · active 473 weeks ago
It is very sad, Mrs. C, and it happens much too often.
Dear Mrs. C,

I wish I could share a photo of the scoop-shaped vintage ceramic spoon rest I recently purchased at a flea market. It says, "The wife can throw out more with a scoop than a man can bring in with a shovel." I don't want to use it as a spoon rest for fear it will break but instead will hang if in my kitchen for all my mentees (the young ladies I mentor) to see!

Great post, Lori! *hugs* to you both,
Kelley~

Post a new comment

Comments by